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SONGS    Compleat, 

Pleasant  and  Divertive ; 

SET    TO 

M  U  S  I  C  K 

and  other  Excellent  Masters  of  the  Town. 

Ending  with  some  ORATIONS,  made  and 
spoken  by  me  several  times  upon  the 
gether  with  some  Copies  of  VERSES,  PRO 
LOGUES,  and  EPILOGUES,  as  well  for  my 
own  PLAYS  as  those  of  other  Poets,  being 
all  Humerous  and  Comical. 



Printed  by  W.  Pearson,  for  J.  Tonson,  at 
SHAKESPEAR'S  Head,  against  Catherine 
Street  in  the  Strand,  1719. 


Alphabetical    TABLE 

OF    THE 

SONGS   and    POEMS 

Contained  in  this 


A  Page 

APalphry  Proud,  priced  up,  10 

A  Maiden  of  late,  whose  Namt^  22 

Arise,  arise,  my  Juggy,  my  Puggy,  44 

A  Doctor  without  any  Stomach^  50 

A  Pox  upon  this  cursed  Life,  63 

A  restless  Lover  I  esfiy'd,  115 

A  Shepherd  set  him  under  a  Thorn ,  136 

All  in  a  misty  Morning,  148 

A  late  Expedition  to  Oxford,  174 

As  I  came  from  Tottingham,  179 

A  lusty  young  Smith  at  his  Vice,  \  95 

All  Hail  to  the  Days  that  merit,  241 

Ah  cruel  bloody  Fate,  what  carfst,  284 

As  fair  Olinda  sitting  was,  298 

All  my  past  Life  is  mine  no  more",  306 

Ah  !  Chloris  awake,  314 

A  lass  /  my  poor  tender  Henri.  346 


An  Alphabetical  TABLE. 


th  Jockey  Young  and  Gay,  271 

Bless  Mortals,  bless  the  clearing,  286 

COme  listen,  good  People,  the  whilst,  \  5 

Come  my  Hearts  of  Gold,  47 

Cook  Lorrel  would  needs  have  the,  101 

Courtiers,  Courtiers,  think  it  no  harm,  142 

Could  Man  his  Wish  obtain,  237 

Caelia,  that  I  once  was  blest,  258 

Come  all  the  Youths  whose  Hearts,  283 

Come  Fair  one  be  kind,  339 

DID  not  you  hear,  243 

Dermot  lov'd  Shela  well  and,  325 

Dolly,  come  be  Brisk  and  Jolly,  331 


in*  Arly  in  the  dawning  of  a,  232 


FArewel  Three  Kings,  where  I,  6 

Fly  merry  News  among  the  Crews^  1 77 

Farweel  bonny  Wully  Craig,  250 

Farewel  the  Darling  Shades  I  love,  240 

For  Iris  /  sigh  and  hourly  die,  247 

Fancelia's  Heart  is  still  the  same,  304 

Fly  from  Olinda  young  and  fair,  305 

Foolish  Swain  thy  sighs  forbear,  349 

GOod  People  all,  I  pray  give  Ear,  4 

God  prosper  long  our  Noble  King,  289 

Go  tell  Amyntor  gentle  Swain,  302 


HAppy  the  Time  when  free  from,  251 

Happy  is  the  Country  Life,  288 

Here's  a  Health  to  those  Men,  341 



yLL  Sing  in  the  Praise,  ifyorfll,  12 

I'll  tell  you  a  Story,  a  Story  anon,  29 


An  Alphabetical  TABLE. 

Jenny  long  resisted  Wully's  fierce  Desire,  65 

Jockey  late  with  Jenny  walking,  90 

If  any  one  long  for  a  Musical  Song,  92 

/  am  a  Lover,  and  'tis  true,  104 

/  have  been  East,  and  I  have,  106 

I  find  I  am  a  Cuckold,  I  care,  108 

If  every  Woman  was.  serif  d  in,  no 

I  prithee  Sweet-heart  grant  me  my,  1 1 2 

In  Summer  time  when  Flowers,  122 

//  is  my  Delight  both  Night  and,  127 

Joan  to  the  May-Pole  away  let's  run,  145 

In  fifty-five,  may  I  never  thrive,  169 

If 't  please  you  for  jo  hear,  192 

In  our  Country,  and  in  your  Country,  196 

Instead  of  our  Buildings  and  Castles,  200 

I'll  sing  you  a  Song  of  my,  213 

/  a  tender  young  Maid  have  been,  2 1 6 

In  the  World  can  ever  a  Trade,  219 

In  the  Gar  diners  Paradise  sweetly,  221 

Jogging  on  from  yonder  Green,  229 

In  the  Shade  iipon  the  Grass,  250 

In  Courts,  Ambition  kills  the  great,  255 

In  Paul's  Church-yard  in  London,  263 

/  never  saw  a  Face  till  now,  303 

In  vain  she  frowns,  in  vain,  308 

In  the  long  Vocation,  317 



ate,  the  loveliest  thing, 

Katy's  a  Beauty  surpassing, 

LAdy,  sweet  now  do  not  frown,  80 

Ladys,  why  doth  Love  torment  you,  82 

Listen  Lordlings  to  my  Story,  85 

Long  have  I  grieved  for  to  see,  86 

Let  Monarchs  fight  for  Pow'r,  227 

Let  the  Soldiers  rejoyce,  277 

Lovely  Laurinda  !  blame  not  me,  309 

Let  Totnam  Court  and  Islington,  326 


An  Alphabetical  TABLE, 


MY  Masters  and  Friends,  and good \  2O 

My  Masters  and  Friends,  and  good.  23 

My  pretty  Maid,  fain  would  I  know,  7 1 

My  Mistress  is  a  Hive  of  Bees  in,  73 

My  Mother  she  will  not  endure,  75 

My  Mind  to  me  a  Kingdom  is,  88 

Maids  are  grown  so  Coy  of  late,  95 

My  Lord's  Son  must  not  be  forgot,  123 


NOw  listen  again  to  those  things,  34 

Now  Gentlemen  sit  ye  all  Merry,  49 

Not  long  ago  as  all  alone  I  lay,  77 

Now  all  my  Friends  are  laid  in,  1 16 

Now  fie  upon  a  Jealous  Brain,  1 1 8 

Nothing  than  Chloe  e'er  I  knew,  209 

Now  every  Place,  fresh  Pleasure  yields,  299 


OH  London  is  a  fine  Town,  40 

Oh  the  Miller,  the  dusty,  61 

Oh,  oh  lead  me,  lead  me  to  some>  126 

O  Love  is  longer  than  the  way,  1 3 1 

One  Evening  a  little  before  it  was  dark,  i  39 

On  Enfield  Common,  / met  a  Woman,  224 

One  Sunday  after  Mass,  Dormet  and,  278 

Oh  /  happy,  happy  Groves,  310 

On  Brandon  Heath,  in  sight  of,  344 


PRey  lend  me  your  Ear  if  you've,  1 8 

Pan  leave  Piping,  the  Gods  have,  26 

Prithee  Friend  leave  off  thy  Thinking,  79 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Toe,  311 

Poor  Cleonice  thy  Garlands  tear,  337 


SO  me  Christian  People  all  give  ear,  \ 

Since  Pop'ry  of  late  is  so  much,  32 

Some  Years  of  late,  in  Eighty  Eight,  37 

Shall  I  wasting  in  Despair,  \  20 

Some  Wives  are  Good,  and  some.  181 


An  Alphabetical  TABLE, 

Still  I'm  Wishing,  still  desiring,  262 

Smiling  Phillis  has  an  Air  so,  281 

Spare  mighty  Love,  oh  spare,  342 

THO'  it  may  seem  rude,  38 

There  was  an  Old  Woman,  45 

To  Hunt  the  Fox  is  an  Old  Sport,  55 

There  was  a  Maid  the  other  Day,  $7 

The?  bootless  I  must  needs  Complain,  59 

They  say  the  World  is  full  of  Pelf,  69 

There  was  a  Lady  in  the  North,  1 30 

There  was  a  Lass  in  Cumberland,  1 33 

The  Wit  hath  long  beholding  been,  157 

The  Beard  thick  or  thin,  1 60 

This  is  a  Structure  fair,  1 66 

TJiere  were  too  Bumpkins  lov'd,  171 

To  charming  Caelia's  Arms  I  flew,  185 

There  was  a  Man,  a  Shentleman,  187 

To  find  my  Tom  of  Bedlam,  1 89 

The  Devil  he  was  so  Weather  beat,  198 

The  Weather's  too  bleak  now,  205 

These  London  Wenches  are  so  stout,  206 

There  lately  was  a  Maiden  Fair,  210 

There  is  one  black  and  sullen,  256 

Three  merry  Lads  met  at  the  Rose,  259 

The  Fire  of  Love  in  Youthful  Blood,  265 

Tho*  the  Pride  of  my  Passion  fair.  301 

Thursday  in  the  Morn,  334 

The  mighty  state  of  Cuckoldom,  336 

Take  not  the  first  Refusal  ill,  352 



Pon  a  time  I  chanced  to  walk,  67 

Under  this  Stone  lies  one,  328 

Upon  the  Wings  of  Love  my,  348 


WHcn  Rich  Men  die,  whose  Purses,  8 

Will  you  please  to  give  car  a  while.  52 

When  Ize  came  first  to  London  Town,  96 

What  tho1  I  am  a  Country  Lass,  152 

Was  ever  a  Man  so  vc.vt  with-  155 


An  Alphabetical  TABLE. 

What  Creature's  that  with  his,  173 

While  the  Citizens  prate,  183 

Women  are  wanton,  yet  cunningly,  201 

What  if  Betty  grows  old,  203 

Whafs  a  Cuckold,  learn  of  me,  208 

When  Sawney  first  did  Wooe  me,  212 

What  need  we  take  care  for,  2 1 5 

Well  Pll  say  that  for  Sir  William,  223 

What  shall  I  do  to  shew  how,  235 

Why  does  the  Morn  in  Blushes  rise,  239 

When  Aureliayfrj/  /  courted,  249 

Whilst  Europe  is  alarm 'd  with,  253 

When  Troy  Town  for  Ten  Years  Wars,  266 

Why  should  we  boast  0/Lais,  273 

When  Cupid  from  his  Mother  fled,  280 

When  I  see  my  Strephon  languish,  307 


\7Our  Courtiers  scorn  we  Country,  99 

JL       You  Maidens  and  Wives,  163 

Young  Phaon  strove  the  Bliss  to  taste,  287 


SONGS  Compleat, 

Pleasant  and  Divertive,  &c. 

VOL.  IV. 

Three  Children  Sliding  on  the  THAMES 

I  JJ1£JJOME  Christian  People  all  give  Ear 

*  *     Unto  the  Grief  of  us, 

*Caus'd  by  tne  Death  of  three  Children  dear, 
*  The  which  it  happen'd  thus. 


VOL.  iv. 

SONGS  Compleat, 

And  eke  there  befel  an  Accident, 

By  fault  of  a  Carpenter's  Son ; 
Who  to  saw  Chips  his  sharp  Ax  lent, 

Woe  worth  the  time,  may  Lon — 

May  London  say,  Woe  worth  the  Carpenter, 

And  all  such  Blockhead  Fools  ; 
Would  he  were  hang'd  up  like  a  Serpent  here, 

For  Jesting  with  Edge  Tools. 

For  into  the  Chips  there  fell  a  spark, 

Which  put  out  in  such  Flames  ; 
That  it  was  known  into  Southwark, 

Which  lives  beyond  the  Thames. 

For  lo  the  Bridge  was  wondrous  high, 

With  Water  underneath ; 
O'er  which  as  many  Fishes  fly, 

As  Birds  therein  do  Breath. 

And  yet  the  Fire  consum'd  the  Bridge, 

Not  far  from  place  of  Landing  ; 
And  tho'  the  Building  was  full  big, 

It  fell  down  Notwithstanding. 

And  eke  into  the  Water  fell 

So  many  Pewter  Dishes  ; 
That  a  Man  might  have  taken  up  very  well 

Both  Boyl'd,  and  Roasted  Fishes. 

And  thus  the  Bridge  of  London  Town, 

For  Building  that  was  sumptuous ; 
Was  all  by  Fire  half  Burnt  down, 

For  being  too  contemptuous. 

And  thus  you  have  all  but  half  my  Song, 

Pray  list  to  what  comes  after  ; 
For  now  I  have  Cool'd  you  with  the  Fire, 

I'll  Warm  you  with  the  Water. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  3 

I'll  tell  you  what  the  River's  Name  is, 

Where  these  Children  did  slide  a; 
It  was  fair  London's  swiftest  Thames, 

That  keeps  both  Time  and  Tide  a. 

All  on  the  Tenth  of  January, 

To  Wonder  of  much  People ; 
'Twas  Frozen  o'er  that  well  'twould  bear, 

Almost  a  Country  Steeple. 

Three  Children  Sliding  thereabout, 

Upon  a  place  too  Thin ; 
That  so  at  last  it  did  fall  out, 

That  they  did  all  fall  In. 

A  great  Lord  there  was  that  laid  with  the  King, 
And  with  the  King  great  Wager  makes ; 

But  when  he  saw  he  could  not  Win, 
He  Sigh'd  and  would  have  drawn  Stakes. 

He  said  it  would  bear  a  Man  for  to  slide, 

And  laid  a  Hundred  Pound ; 
The  King  said  it  would  break,  and  so  it  did, 

For  Three  Children  there  were  Drown'd. 

Of  which  One's  Head  was  from  his  Shoulder — 
Ears  stricken  whose  Name  was  John  ; 

Who  then  Cry'd  out  as  loud  as  he  cou'd, 
O  Lon-a  Lon-a  London. 

0  tut-tut-turn  from  thy  Sinful  Race, 
Thus  did  his  Speech  decay ; 

1  Wonder  that  in  such  a  Case, 

He  had  no  more  to  say. 

And  thus  being  drown'd  a-lack,  a-!ack, 
The  Water  ran  down  their  Throats  ; 

And  stops  their  Breaths  Three  Hours  by  the  Clock, 
Before  they  could  get  any  Boats. 

B  2  Ye 

SONGS  Compleat, 

Ye  Parents  all  that  Children  have, 

And  ye  that  have  none  yet ; 
Preserve  your  Children  from  the  Grave, 

And  teach  them  at  Home  to  sit. 

For  had  these  at  a  Sermon  been, 

Or  else  upon  Dry  Ground  ; 
Why  then  I  would  never  have  been  seen, 

If  that  they  had  been  Drown'd. 

Even  as  a  Huntsman  ties  his  Dogs, 
For  fear  they  should  go  from  him ; 

So  tie  your  Children  with  Severities  Clog, 
Untie  'em,  and  you'll  undo  'em. 

God  Bless  our  Noble  Parliament, 
And  rid  them  from  all  Fears ; 

God  Bless  th'  Commons  of  this  Land, 
And  God  Bless  some  o'th'  Peers. 

PHIL.  PORTER'S  Farewel.    To  the  same  Tune. 

GOOD  People  all,  I  pray  give  Ear, 
My  Words  concern  ye  much ; 
I  will  repeat  a  Hector's  Life, 
Pray  God  ye  be  not  such. 

There  was  a  Gallant  in  the  Town, 

A  Brave  and  Jolly  Sporter ; 
Ther  was  no  Lady  in  the  Land, 

But  he  knew  Jiow  to  Court  her. 

His  Person  Comely  was  and  Tall, 
More  Comely  have  been  few  Men  ; 

Which  made  him  well  belov'd  of  Men, 
But  more  belov'd  of  Women. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  5 

Besides  all  this,  I  can  you  tell, 

That  he  \vas  well  Endowed 
With  many  Graces  of  the  Mind, 

Had  they  been  well  bestowed. 

He  was  as  Liberal  as  the  Sun, 

His  Gold  he  freely  spent ; 
Whether  it  were  his  own  Estate, 

Or  that  it  were  him  lent. 

For  Valour  he  a  Lyon  was, 

I  say  a  Lyon  bold  ; 
For  he  no  Living  Man  did  Fear, 

That  Sword  in  Hand  did  hold. 

And  when  that  he  with  glittering  Blade, 

Did  e'er  assail  his  Foes  \ 
Full  well  I  tro,  they  did  not  miss 

Their  Belly  full  of  Blows. 

A  French  Man  once  assaulted  him, 

And  told  him  that  he  Ly'd  ; 
For  which  with  Quart  pot  he  him  slew, 

And  so  the  French  Man  Dy'd, 

Three  Danes,  Six  Germans,  and  Five  Swedes, 

Met  him  in  Lane  of  Drury  ; 
Who  cause  they  took  of  him  the  Wall, 

He  Kill'd  them  in  his  Fury. 

Upon  his  Body  welladay, 

Full  many  a  Scar  he  bore  ; 
His  Skin  did  look  like  Sattin  Pinck'd, 

With  Gashes  many  a  Score. 

Oh  !  had  he  lost  that  Noble  Blood 

For  Country's  Liberty ; 
Where  could  all  England  then  have  found 

So  brave  a  Man  as  he  ? 


SONGS  Compleat, 

But  Woe  is  me  these  Virtues  great, 

Were  all  Eclips  'd  with  Vice  ; 
Just  so  the  Sun  that  new  Shines  bright, 

Is  darkn'd  in  a  trice. 

For  he  did  Swagger,  Drink  and  Game, 

Indeed  what  would  he  not  \ 
His  Psalter  and  his  Catechise 

He  utterly  forgot. 

But  he  is  gone,  and  we  will  let 

No  more  of  him  be  said  ; 
They  say  'tis  naught  for  to  reveal 

The  Vices  of  the  Dead. 

Besides  we  have  some  cause  to  think 
That  he  may  'scape  Tormenting  ; 

For  the  Old  Nurse  that  Watch'd  with  him, 
Did  say  he  Dy'd  Repenting. 

The  Second  PART. 

FArewel  Three  Kings,  where  I  have  spent 
Full  many  an  Idle  Hour  ; 
Where  oft  I  Won,  but  never  Lost, 
If  'twere  within  my  Power. 

Where  the  Raw  Gallants  I  did  chuse, 

Like  any  Rag-a-muffin  ; 
But  now  I'm  sick  and  cannot  Play, 

Who'll  trust  me  for  a  Coffin. 

Farewel  my  dearest  Pickadilly, 

Notorious  for  great  Dinners  ; 
Oh  what  a  Tennis-  Court  was  there  ! 

Alas  !  too  good  for  Sinners. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  7 

Farewel  Spring-Garden  where  I  us'd 

To  Piss  before  the  Ladies  ; 
Poor  Souls  !  Who'll  be  their  Hector  now 

And  get  'em  pretty  Babies. 

Farewel  the  Glory  of  Hide-Park, 

Which  was  to  me  so  dear ; 
Ah,  since  I  can't  enjoy  it  more, 

Would  I  were  Buried  there. 

Farewel  Tormenting  Creditors, 
Whose  Scores  did  so  Perplex  me  ; 

Well !  Death  I  see  for  something's  good, 
For  now  they'll  cease  to  vex  me. 

Farewel  true  Brethren  of  the  Sword, 

All  Martial  Men  and  Stout ; 
Farewell  dear  Drawer  at  the  Fleece, 

I  cannot  leave  thee  out. 

My  Time  draws  on,  I  now  must  go, 

From  this  beloved  Light; 
Remember  me  to  pretty  Sue, 

And  so  dear  Friends  good  Night 

With  that  on  Pillow  low  he  laid 

His  Pale  and  Drooping  Head ; 
And  streight  e'er  Cat  could  lick  her  Ear, 

Poor  Philly  he  was  Dead. 

Now  God  Bless  all  that  will  be  Blest, 

God  Bless  the  Inns  of  Court ; 
And  God  bless  D 'Avenant 's  Opera, 

Which  is  the  Sport  of  Sports. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

On  the  DEATH  o/]o.  Wright. 
7!?  the  same  Tune. 

WHEN  Rich  Men  Die,  whose  Purses  swell 
With  Silver  and  with  Gold ; 
They  straight  shall  have  a  Monument, 
Their  Memories  t'uphold. 

Yet  all  that  Men  can  say  of  them, 

They  lived  so  unknown ; 
Is  but  to  write  upon  their  Tomb, 

Here  lieth  such  a  one. 

When  Joseph  Wright,  who  Dyed  Poor, 

(Tho'  Simon  was  his  Porter) 
Shall  Die  as  if  he  ne'er  had  been, 

And  want  his  Worth's  Reporter. 

Full  many  a  Cann  he  often  Drank, 

In  Fleet-Street  in  the  Cellar  ; 
Yet  he  must  unremember'd  Die, 

Like  some  base  Fortune-teller. 

He  made  the  Ballad  of  the  Turk, 

And  sung  it  in  the  Street ; 
And  Shall  he  Die,  and  no  Man  heed  it  ? 

No  Friends,  it  is  not  meet. 

He  lived  in  a  Garret  high, 

Not  much  below  the  Steeple  ; 
And  shall  he  Die,  alass  poor  Jo, 

Unknown  unto  the  People. 

He  had  a  Dog,  his  Name  was  Trot, 

Th'  Dog  with  him  did  lye  ; 
Shall  Tobit  Live  for  his  Dog's  sake, 

And  Jo  neglected  Die  ? 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  9 

He  had  no  Curtains  to  his  Bed, 

But  yet  for  t'other  Quart ; 
Coin  he  would  find,  and  shall  he  Die 

And  no  Man  lay't  to  Heart  ? 

He  hated  all  the  Female  Sex, 

Who  knew  his  private  Grudge ; 
And  must  he  therefore  Die  forgot  ? 

I  leave  the  World  to  Judge. 

Each  Term  he  ask'd  his  Father  Blessing, 

On  bended  Knee  demurely  ; 
Who  then  did  give  him  Shillings  Ten, 

And  must  he  die  Obscurely  ? 

No,  Jo,  I'll  bid  Peace  to  thy  Bones, 

Tho'  they  were  Sick  and  Crasie ; 
And  must  be  quite  made  New  again, 

Before  that  Heaven  can  raise  thee. 

And  since  thou'rt  gone,  and  there  is  none 
Who  knoweth  where  to  find  thee ; 

I'll  fix  this  Truth  upon  thy  Name, 
Thou  didst  leave  Wit  behind  thee. 

Wit  that  shall  make  thy  Name  to  last, 
When  Taritorfs  Jests  are  Rotten ; 

And  Gcorge-a- Green,  and  Mother  Bunch 
Shall  all  be  quite  forgotten. 

Now  if  you  ask  where  Jo  is  gone, 

You  think  I  cannot  tell ; 
Oh  he  is  Blest,  for  he  was  Poor, 

And  could  not  go  to  Hell. 

But  for  his  Father,  Rich  in  Bags, 

The  Devil  ought  to  have  him  ; 
That  took  no  Care  of  such  a  Son, 

Till  'twas  too  late  to  save  him. 


io  SONGS  Compleat, 


A  FABLE.     To  the  same  Tune. 

APalphry  Proud,  prick'd  up  with  Pride, 
Went  Prancing  on  the  Way ; 
By  chance  a  Mill-horse  he  espy'd, 
At  whom  he  'gan  to  Neigh. 

And  scornfully  with  great  Disdain 

The  Palphry  he  stood  still ; 
And  laughed  at  the  silly  Horse, 

Which  carry 'd  sacks  to  Mill. 

Stand  back,  quoth  he,  thou  moyling  Ass, 

A  Shame  to  Beggars  kind  ; 
Give  place  to  me,  thy  Lord,  to  pass, 

Thou  Drudge  and  toiling  Hind. 

And  with  these  Words  he  flung  his  Heels, 

And  by  the  Mill-Horse  pass'd ; 
To  whom  the  silly  Jade  in  Field, 

Did  thus  reply  at  last. 

Well,  Well,  quoth  he,  with  mournful  Mind, 

Full  little  know'st  thou  yet ; 
E'er  that  thou  come  unto  thy  End, 

Who  on  thy  Back  shall  sit. 

When  I  was  Young,  as  thou  art  now, 

Full  little  did  I  Care ; 
And  never  thought  upon  these  Sacks, 

Which  now  to  Mill  I  bear. 

I  could  both  Manage,  Stop  and  Turn, 

Curvet,  and  bravely  Fling ; 
At  Tilts  and  Turnaments  I  serv'd, 

Likewise  to  Run  a  Race  at  Ring. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  1 1 

Then  was  I  fed  with  Corn  and  Hay, 

And  had  each  thing  at  Will ; 
But  when  my  Strength  did  wear  away, 

I  sold  was  to  the  Mill. 

And  thou  which  proudly  here  dost  Prance, 

And  giv'st  no  Man  the  Way ; 
Full  little  dost  thou  know  how  soon 

Thou  shalt  come  to  decay. 

Thy  Master's  Stable  is  no  Grange, 

Boast  not  therefore  of  Strength  ; 
Yet  not  so  Constant  is  by  chance, 

As  thou  shalt  find  at  length. 

Bucephalus  upon  his  Back 

A  Mighty  Monarch  bore  ; 
When  he  had  spent  his  fresh  green  Youth, 

The  Dogs  his  Flesh  did  Tear. 

A  Horse,  a  Hound,  a  Hawk,  a  Man, 

Serve  but  their  Youthful  Prime  ; 
Therefore  take  heed  if  thou  be  Wise, 

Lay  hold  while  it  is  Time. 

Trust  not  then  to  after  Wou'ds, 

Gape  not  for  had  I  list ; 
Ten  Birds  on  Wing  are  not  so  good 

As  One  upon  the  Fist. 

With  store  of  Shells  in  Pease-cod  time, 

Besure  thou  shalt  be  Fed  ; 
With  fair  Words  and  sweet  ones  too, 

Besure  thou  shalt  be  led. 

And  when  thy  Strength  does  wear  away, 

And  Beauty  'gins  to  fade  ; 
Away  then  with  this  Doating  Ass, 

He  serveth  for  the  Spade. 


12  SONGS  Compleat, 

Lo  here  you  lusty  lads  to  learn, 

Under  a  Caveat  told  ; 
That  Younglings  spend  their  fresh  green  Youth, 

Not  thinking  to  be  Old. 

Therefore  hoist  not  your  Sails  too  high, 

Disdain  not  simple  Will ; 
For  many  a  sturdy  Horse  e'er  now, 

Hath  carried  Sacks  to  Mill. 

The  Royal  REGIMENT. 
By  Jo.  HAYNES. 


I'LL  Sing  in  the  Praise,  if  you'll  lend  but  an  Ear, 
Of  the  fierce  Royal  Regiment,  but  don't  think  I 
For  I   vow  and  protest,  they're  as  brave  Men  and 

As  ever  Old  Rome  bred,  or  New  Iniskilling. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  1 3 

Lord,  had  you  but  seen  'em  March  with  that  Decorum, 
That  no  Roman  Triumph  cou'd  e'er  go  before  'em ; 
Some  Smoaking,  some  Whistling,  all  meaning  no  Harm, 
Like  Yorkshire  Attorneys,  coming  up  to  the  Term. 

On  Long-tails,  on  Bob-tails,  on  Trotters  and  Pacers, 
On  Pads,  Hawkers,  Hunters,  on  Higlers  and  Racers ; 
You'd  have  sworn  Knights  and  Squires,  Prigs,  Cuckolds, 

and  Panders, 
Appear'd  all  like  so  many  brave  Alexanders. 

Those  Warriours  who  through  all  Dangers  must  go, 
Most  bravely  despising  Blood,  Battle  and  Foe ; 
Was  Mounted  on  Steeds  the  last  Lord-Mayors  Day, 
From  T'urky,  Spain,  Barbary,  Coach,  Cart  and  Dray. 

'Twas  that  very  Day  their  high  Prowess  was  shown, 
In  guarding  the  King  thro'  the  Fire-works  o'  th'  Town; 
Tho'  Sparks  were  Unhorst,  and  their  lac'd  Coats  were 

Yet  they  dreaded  no  Squibs,  from  Man,  Woman,  or 


The  Cornet  whose  Nose,  tho'  it  spoke  him  no  Roman, 
Was  Mounted  that  Day  on  a  Horse  fearing  no  Man  ; 
No  wonder,  for  all  o'er  his  Trappings  so  sumptuous, 
He   ty'd    Squibs   and   Crackers ;   'twas  mighty  Pre 

But  mark  his  Design,  Faith  'tis  worth  your  Admiring, 
'Twas  to  let  the  Queen  see  how  his  Horse  wou'd  stand 

Firing ; 

Not  wisely  considering  Her  Majesty's  Marry'd, 
And  he  had  been  Hang'd,  had  some  Body  Miscarry'd. 

All  Hearts  true  as  Steel,  but  of  all  the  brave  Fellows, 
The  Scriv'ner  for  my  Money,  who  was  so  Zealous ; 
He  sent  for  the  Lease  of  his  own  House  from  Home, 
To  make  out  a  Cov'ring  for  the  Troop's  Kettle-Drum. 

The  Lieutenant  Colonel  being  thrown  by  a  Gennet, 
His  Son-in-Law  fancying  some  Treachery  in  it ; 


14  SONGS  Compleat, 

Gave  the  Horse  the  Oats,which  the  Beast  took  they  say, 
But  Swore  by  the  Lord  they  went  down  like  chopt  Hay. 

He  the  Horse  of  some  Irish  Papist  did  buy, 
So  doubting,  as  well  he  might,  his  Loyalty ; 
He  made  him  to  Eat  with  his  Oats  Gunpowdero, 
And  -Prance  to  the  Tune  of  Old  Lilly-bur lero. 

The  Tub-preaching  Saint  was  so  Zealous  a  Blade, 
In  Jack-Boots  day  &  night  he  Sleep'd,  Preach'd  & 


To  call  'em  to  Prayers  he  needs  no  Saints  Bell, 
For  Gingling  his  Spurs  Chimes  'em  in  all  as  well. 

A  Noble  stout  Scriv'ner  who  now  shall  be  Nameless, 
That  in  Day  of  Battle  he  might  be  found  Blameless  ; 
A  War-Horse  of  Wood  of  a  Dutch  Carver  buys, 
To  learn  with  more  safety  the  Horse  Exercise. 

With  one  Eye  on's  Honour,  the  other  on  Gain, 
He  fixes  a  Desk  on  Bticcphalus 's  Main  ; 
That  so  by  this  means  he  his  Prancer  bestriding, 
Might  practice  at  once  both  his  Writing  and  Riding. 

But  Oh  the  sad  News  that  their  Joy  quite  confounds, 
To  Ireland  their  own  like  the  last  Trumpet  Sounds  ; 
Lord,  Lord  how  this  set  them  to  writing  Petitions, 
And  thinking  of  nothing  but  Terms  and  Conditions. 

Ah  !  who'll  March  for  me  ?  Speak  any  that  dare, 
Here's  a  Horse  &-a  Hundred  Pound  for  him,  that's  fair; 
Dear    Courtier    excuse    me     from    Teague-land  and 

And   take   which  you   please,  Sir,   my   Wife  or  my 


Some  feign'd  themselves  Lame,  some  feign'd  them 
selves  Clapt, 

At  last  finding  all  themselves  by  themselves  Trapt ; 
The  King  most  unanimously  they  Addrest, 
And  told  him  the  Truth,  it  was  all  but  a  Jest. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  1 5 

A  Jest,  quoth  the  King,  and  with  that  the  King  Smil'd, 
Come  it  ne'er  shall  be  said  that  a  good  Jest  was  spoil'd  ; 
Therefore  I  dismiss  you,  in  Peace  all  depart, 
Sir,  'tis  more  Your  Goodness,  than  our  desert. 

Thus  being  deliver'd  from  th'  tedious  Vexation, 
Of  being  Defenders  of  this  or  that  Nation  ; 
They  Kiss'd  Royal  Fist,  and  were  Drunk  all  for  Joy, 
Then  broke  all  their  Swords,  and  cry'd,  Vive  le  Roy. 

A  Sad  and  lamentable  Account  of  an  un 
happy  Accident  that  befel  a  young  Gen- 
tleman,  by  a  Fall  from  his  Horse,  whereby 
he  most  dangerously  hurt  his  Nose  and 
Chin.  The  Words  by  Mr.  FISHBURN. 

COME  listen,  good  People,  the  whilst  I  relate, 
An  Accident  most  Unfortunate, 
Of  a  Horse,  and  a  Gentleman,  and  a  sad  Fate, 
Which  no  Body  can  deny. 


1 6  SONGS  Compleat, 

Then  first  of  the  First,  says  the  Country  Parson, 
It  was  a  Mad  Beast  as  e'er  was  clap'd  Arse  on, 
And  he  would  Run  furiously  like  a  Mars  on, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

It  was  not  a  Horse,  nor  a  Mare,  but  a  Gelding, 
A  Run-away  Beast  that  will  not  be  held  in, 
To  say  the  Truth,  'twas  a  very  Heilding, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

To  tell  you  his  Colour,  his  Age,  ,pr  his  Feature, 
At  what  he  was  Rated,  or  what  was  his  Stature, 
Why  Faith  'twould  be  something  besides  our  Matter, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

But  now  to  Proceed  something  faster, 
And  tell  you  the  Cause  of  this  sad  Disaster, 
Ay,  and  how  this  Horse  did  serve  his  Master, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

As  this  Horse  and  his  Master  were  going  to  Bed, 
(The  Master  and  Horse,  I  should  have  said) 
Away  ran  this  Horse  as  if  he  had  fled, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Onwards  went  Pegassus,  there  let  him  Stray, 
Off  went  the  Gentleman,  there  let  him  lay, 
For  this  Beast  had  not  the  Good  Manners  to  stay, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Then  an  angry  Charioteer  did  approach, 

With  a  Pox  take  your  Worship,  you  have  spoil'd  the 


Which  was  before  as  Sound  as  a  Roach, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

But  the  Lady  in  milder  Terms  did  begin, 
With  alass  good  Gentleman,  pray  have  him  in, 
Lord  how  he  has  hurt  his  Nose  and  his  Chin, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  1 7 

And  when  they  had  sit  him  down  in  a  Chair, 
They  all  of  his  Life  began  to  despair, 
At  length  they  did  venture  to  put  up  this  Prayer, 
Which  no  Body,  £c. 

O  Thou  that  Present st  us  at  Bed  and  Board, 
Some  help  to  this  Dying  Man  afford, 
For  our  Squire  we  fear,  is  as  Drunk  as  a  Lord, 
Which  no  Body,  6°<r. 

But  then  came  a  Couple,  I  took  'em" for  Dray-men, 
But  they  prov'd  a  Brace  of  your  Praying  Lay-men, 
The  one  cry'd  God  Bless  him,  the  other  cry'd  Amen, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Then  a  Pox  of  your  Praying,  crys  out  a  Painter, 
Unless  you  had  a  prevailing  Saint  here, 
Such  Winning's  enough  to  make  a  Man  faint  here, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Then  First  he  did  wisely  Examine  his  Skull, 
His  Legs  and  his  Arms  he  next  did  pull, 
Which  made  this  Calf  roar  out  like  a  Bull, 
Which  no  Body,  £c. 

At  Portsmouth  there  lately  did  Land  an  Hamburgean, 
Who  Eat  Pickl'd  Dog,  and  took  it  for  Sturgeon, 
So  we  had  a  Painter  instead  of  a  Surgeon, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

But  then  came  a  Lawyer  to  make  up  the  round, 
And  he  to  the  Purpose  a  Proverb  had  found, 
He  that's  Born  to  be  Hang'd  shall  never  be  Drown'd 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Then  come  some  Old  Women  to  make  up  the  Ditty, 
With  alas  good  Gentleman,  Faith  'twas  a  Pity, 
He  was  the  Prettiest  Man  in  all  the  City, 
Which  no  Body  can  deny. 

VOL.  iv.  c  The 

1 8  SONGS  Compleat, 


To  the  same  T^tne. 

PRey  lend  me  your  Ear  if  you've  any  to  spare. 
You  that  love  Common-wealth  as  you  hate  com 
mon  Prayer, 

That  can  in  a  Breath,  Pray,  Dissemble  and  Swear. 
Which  no  Body  can  deny,  deny ;  which  no  Body  can 

I'm  first  on  the  wrong-side,  and  then  on  the  right, 
To  Day  I'm  a  Jack,  and  to  morrow  a  Mite, 
I  for  either  King  Pray,  but  for  neither  dare  Fight. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Sometimes  I'm  a  Rebel,  sometimes  I'm  a  Saint, 
Sometimes  I  can  Preach,  and  at  other  times  Cant ; 
There  is  nothing  but  Grace  I  thank  God  that  I  want. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Old  Babylon's  Whore,  I  cannot  endure  her, 
I'm  a  Sanctify'd  Saint,  there's  none  can  be  Purer, 
For  Swearing  I  hate  like  any  Non-Juror. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Of  our  Gracious  King  William  I  am  a  great  Lover, 
Yet  I  side  with  a  Party  that  Prays  for  another, 
^J'd  drink  the  King's  Health,  take  it  one  way  or  t'other, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Precisely  I  creep  like  a  Snail  to  the  Meeting, 
Where  Sighing  I  sit,  and  such  sorrowful  Greeting, 
Makes  me  hate  a  long  Prayer  and  two  hours  Prating. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diverlive.  \  9 

And  then  I  sing  Psalms  as  if  never  weary, 
Yet  I  must  confess,  when  I'm  Frolick  and  Merry ; 
More  Musick  I  find  in  A  Boat  to  the  Ferry. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

I  can  pledge  ev'ry  Health  my  Companions  drink  round, 
I  can  say,  Heaven  Bless,  or  the  Devil  Confound ; 
I  can  hold  with  the  Hare,  and  run  with  the  Hound. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

I  can  Pray  for  a  Bishop,  and  Curse  an  Arch-Deacon, 
I  can  seem  very  sorry  that  Charleroy's  Taken  ; 
I  can  any  thing  say  to  save  my  own  Bacon. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Sometimes  for  a  good  Common-wealths  I  am  wishing, 

0  Oliver,  Oliver,  give  us  thy  Blessing, 
For  in  troubled  Waters  now  I  love  Fishing. 

Which  no  Body,  &c. 

The  Times  are  so  ticklish  I  vow  and  profess, 

1  know  not  which  Party  or  Cause  to  embrace ; 

I'll  side  with  those  to  besure  that  are  least  in  Distress. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

With  the  Jacks  I  rejoyce  that  Savoy's  defeated, 
With  the  Whigs  I  seem  pleas'd  he  so  bravely  Retreated, 
Friends  and  Foes  are  by  me  both  equally  treated. 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Each  Party  you  see,  is  thus  full  of  great  Hope, 
There  are  some  for  the  Devil  and  some  for  die  Pope, 
And  I  am  for  any  thing,  but  for  a  Rope. 
Which  no  Body  can  deny,  &c. 

c  2  The 

2O  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  CUT-PURSE.     By  B.  JOHNSON. 

Y  Masters  and  Friends,  and  good  People  draw 
_    _          near, 
And  look  to  your  Purses,  for  that  I  do  say, 
And  tho'  little  Money  in  them  you  do  wear, 
It  cost  more  to  get  than  to  lose  in  a  Day ; 
You  oft  have  been  told, 
The  Young  and  the  Old, 
And  bidden  beware  of  the  Cut-purse  so  bold  ; 
Then  if  you  take  heed  not,  free  me  from  the  Curse, 
Who  give  you  fair  Warning  for  and  the  Cut-purse. 
Youth,  Youth,  thou  hatfst  better  been  starved  at  Nurse, 
Then  for  to  be  hanged  for  cuffing  a  Purse. 

It  hath  been  upbraided  to  Men  of  my  Trade, 
That  oft-times  we  are  the  Cause  of  this  Crime, 

Alack  and  for  pity,  why  should  it  be  said  ? 
As  if  they  regarded  the  Place  or  Time  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  2 1 

Examples  have  been, 
Of  some  that  were  seen, 
In  Westminster- Hall,  yea,  the  Pleaders  between  : 

Then  why  should  the  Judges  be  free  from  this  Curse, 
More  than  my  poor  self,  for  cutting  the  Purse  ? 
Youth,  Youth,  &c. 

At  Worcester  'tis  known  well,  and  even  i'th'  Jayl, 

A  Knight  of  good  worth  did  there  shew  his  Face, 
Against  the  small  Sinner  in  rage  for  to  rail, 
And  lost  Ipse  Facto,  his  Purse  i'th'  Place  ; 
Nay,  even  from  the  Seat 
Of  Judgment  so  great, 

A  Judge  there  did  loose  a  fair  Purse  of  Velvet, 
O  Lord  for  thy  Mercy,  how  wicked  or  worse, 
Are  those  that  so  venture  their  Necks  for  a  Purse  ? 
Youth,  Youth,  &c. 

At  Plays  and  at  Sermons,  and  at  the  Sessions, 
Tis  daily  their  Practice  such  Booties  to  make  ; 

Yea,  under  the  Gallows  at  Executions, 

They  stick  not,  but  stare  about  Purses  to  take ; 
Nay,  once  without  Grace, 
At  a  better  place, 

At  Court,  and  at  Christmass  before  the  King's  Face ; 

Alack  then  for  pitty  must  I  bear  the  Curse, 

That  only  belong  to  the  cunning  Cut-purse  ? 
Youth,  Youth,  &c. 

But  oh  you  vile  Nation  of  Cut-Purses  all, 

Relent  and  Repent,  and  amend,  and  be  sound, 
And  know  that  you  ought  not  by  honest  Mens  Fall, 
To  advance  your  own  Fortunes,  to  die  above  Ground ; 
And  tho'  you  go  Gay, 
In  Silks,  as  you  may, 

It  is  not  the  High-way  to  Heaven  (they  say), 
Repent,  then  Repent  ye  for  better  for  worse, 
And  Kiss  not  the  Gallows  for  Cutting  a  Purse. 
Youth,  Youth,  &c. 


22  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  MAIDEN'S  Longing.     To  the  same 

A  Maiden  of  late, 
Whose  Name  sweet  Kate, 
She  dwelt  in  London  near  Aldersgate  ; 
Now  list  to  my  Ditty,  declare  it  I  can, 
She  would  have  a  Child,  without  help  of  a  Man. 

To  a  Doctor  she  came, 

A  Man  of  Great  Fame, 

Whose  deep  Skill  in  Physick  Report  did  proclaim, 
Quoth  she,  Mr.  Doctor  shew  me  if  you  can, 
How  I  may  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

Then  listen,  quoth  he, 
Since  so  it  must  be, 

This  wondrous  strange  Med'cine  I'll  shew  presently ; 
Take  Nine  Pound  of  Thunder,  Six  Legs  of  a  Swan, 
And  you  shall  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

The  Wool  of  a  Frog, 

The  Juice  of  a  Log, 

Well  Parboil'd  together  in  the  Skin  of  a  Hog, 
With  the  Egg  of  a  Moon  Calf,  if  get  you  can, 
And  you  shall  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

The  Love  of  false  Harlots, 

The  Faith  of  false  Varlots, 

With  the  Truth  of  Decoys  that  walk  in  their  Scarlets, 
And  the  Feathers  of  a  Lobster  well  fry'd  in  a  Pan, 
And  you  shall  conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

Nine  drops  of  Rain, 

Brought  hither  from  Spain, 

With  the  Blast  of  a  Bellows  quite  over  the  Main, 
With  eight  Quarts  of  Brimstone  Brew'd  in  a  Beer-Cann, 
And  you  shall  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  23 

Six  Pottles  of  Lard, 

Squeezed  from  a  Rock  hard, 
With  Nine  Turkey  Eggs,  each  as  long  as  a  Yard, 
With  a  Pudding  of  Hail-stones  well  bak'd  in  a  Pan, 
And  you  shall  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

These  Med'cines  are  good, 

And  approved  have  stood, 
Well  temper'd  together  with  a  Pottle  of  Blood, 

Squeez'd  from  a  Grashopper  and  the  Nail  of  a  Swan, 
To  make  Maids  Conceive  without  help  of  a  Man. 

Upon  the  PYRAMID.     By  Mr.  Ratcliffe. 
To  the  foregoing  Tune. 

MY  Masters  and  Friends,  and  good  People  draw 

For  here's  a  New  Sight  which  you  must  not  escape, 
A  Stately  young  Fabrick  that  cost  very  dear, 
Renown'd  for  strait  Body  and  Barbary  shape  j 
A  Pyramid  much  high'r, 
Than  a  Steeple  or  Spire, 
By  which  you  may  guess  there  has  been  a  Fire. 

Ah  London  th'adst  better  have  built  New  Burdello's, 
T'  encourage  She-Traders  and  lusty  Young  Fellows. 

No  sooner  the  City  had  lost  their  old  Houses, 

But  they  set  up  this  Monument  wonderful  tall ; 
Tho'  when  Christians  were  Burnt,  as  Fox  plainly  shews 


There  was  nothing  set  up  but  his  Book  in  the  HalL 
And  yet  these  Men  can't 
In  their  Conscience  but  grant, 
That  a  House  is  unworthy  compar'd  to  a  Saint. 
Ah  London,  &c. 


24  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Children  of  Men  in  erecting  old  Babel, 
To  be  saved  from  Water  did  only  desire  : 
So  the  City  presumes  that  this  young  one  is  able, 
When  occasion  shall  serve,  to  secure  them  from  Fire. 
Blowing  up  when  all's  done 
Preserves  the  best  Town, 

But  this  Hieroglyphic  will  soon  be  blown  down. 
Ah  London,  &c. 

Some  say  it  resembles  a  Glass,  fit  for  Mum, 

And  think  themselves  Witty  by  giving  Nick-names  : 
An  Extinguisher  too  'tis  fancied  by  some, 
As  set  up  on  purpose  to  put  out  the  Flames, 
But  what  ever  they  shall 
This  Workmanship  call, 

Had  it  never  been  thought  on  'thad  been  a  Save-all. 
Ah  London,  &c. 

Some  Passengers  seem  to  suspect  the  grave  City, 
As  Men  not  so  wise  as  they  shou'd  be,  or  so ; 
And  oftentimes  say,  'tis  a  great  deal  of  pity 

So  much  Coin  shou'd  be  spent,  and  so  little  to  show. 
But  these  Men  ne'er  stop 
To  pray  for  going  up, 

For  all  that's  worth  seeing,  is  when  y'are  a-top. 
Ah  London,  &c. 

But  O  you  proud  Nations  of  Citizens  all, 

Supposing  y'had  rear'd  but  only  one  Stone, 
And  on  it  Engrav'd  a  stupendious  Tale, 

Of  a  Conflagration  the  like  was  ne'er  known  : 
It  had  been  as  good 
T'have  humour'd  the  Croud, 
And  then  y'had  prevented  their  Laughing  aloud. 
Ah  London  tttadst  better  have  built  New  Burdello's, 
T  encourage  She-Traders,  and  lusty  Young  Fellows. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

On  the  Lovely  Mrs.  K.  W. 


Ate,  the  loveliest  thing, 

That  e'er  was  form'd  by  Nature, 

Flora  i'th'  pride  of  Spring, 

Ne'er  wore  so  sweet  a  Feature. 

Her  Air,  her  Port,  her  Mien, 

Her  Lips,  her  Eyes,  Complexion, 

Had  Jove  when  on  Earth,  but  seen, 
He  had  doted  to  Perfection. 

With  Kisses  and  Blisses  one's  drown'd, 

In  Seas  of  liquid  Pleasure  ; 
Such  store  of  Riches  there  I  found, 

She's  an  endless  Mine  of  Treasure. 


26  SONGS  Compleat, 


E^;z  leave  Piping,  the  Gods  have  done  Feasting, 
There's  never  a  Goddess  a  Hunting  to  Day ; 
tals  marvel  at  Condon's  Jesting, 
That  gives  the  assistance  to  entertain  May. 
The  Lads  and  the  Lasses,  with  Scarfs  on  their  Faces, 

So  lively  as  passes,  trip  over  the  Downs : 
Much  Mirth  and  Sport  they  make,  running  at  Parley- 
Lord  what  haste  they  make  for  a  Green-gown  ! 

John  with  Gillan,  Harry  with  Frances, 

Meg  and  Mary,  with  Robin  and  Will, 
George  and  Margery  lead  all  the  Dances, 

For  they  were  reported  to  have  the  best  Skill : 
But  Cicily  and  Nancy,  the  fairest  of  many, 

That  came  last  of  any,  from  out  of  the  Towns, 
Quickly  got  in  among  the  midst  of  all  the  Throng, 

They  so  much  did  long  for  their  Green-gowns. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  2  7 

Wanton  Deborah  whispered  with  Dorothy, 

That  she  would  wink  upon  Richard  and  Sy m, 
Mincing  Maudlin  shew'd  her  Authority, 

And  in  the  Quarrel  would  venture  a  Limb. 
But  Sibel  was  sickly,  and  could  not  come  quickly, 

And  therefore  was  likely  to  fall  in  a  Swoon, 
Tib  would  not  tarry  for  Tom,  nor  for  Harry, 

Lest  Christian  should  carry  away  the  Green-gown. 

Blanch  and  Bettrice,  both  of  a  Family, 

Came  very  lazy  lagging  behind  ; 
Annise  and  Aimable  noting  their  Policy, 

Cupid  is  cunning,  although  he  be  blind  : 
But  Winny  the  Witty,  that  came  from  the  City, 

With  Parnel  the  Pretty,  and  Besse  the  Brown  ; 
Clem,  Joan,  and  Isabel,  Sue,  Alice  and  bonny  Nell, 

Travell'd  exceedingly  for  a  Green-gown. 

Now  the  Youngsters  had  reach'd  the  green  Meadow, 

Where  they  intended  to  gather  their  May, 
Some  in  the  Sun-shine,  some  in  the  Shadow, 

Singled  in  Couples  did  fall  to  their  Play  ; 
But  constant  Penelope,  Faith,  Hope  and  Charity, 

Look'd  very  modestly,  yet  they  lay  down  ; 
And  Prudence  prevented  what  Rachel  repented, 

And  Kate  was  contented  to  take  a  Green-gown. 

Then  they  desired  to  know  of  a  truth, 

If  all  their  Fellows  were  in  the  like  Case, 
Nem  call'd  for  Ede,  and  Ede  for  Ruth, 

Ruth  for  Marcy,  and  Marcy  for  Grace; 
But  there  was  no  speaking,  they  answer'd  with  squeak 

The  pretty  Lass  breaking  the  head  of  the  Clown  ; 
But  some  were  Wooing,  while  others  were  doing, 

Yet  all  their  going  was  for  a  Green-gown. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

Bright  Apollo  was  all  this  while  peeping, 

To  see  if  his  Daphne  had  been  in  the  Throng ; 
But  missing  her  hastily  downwards  was  creeping, 

For  Thetis  imagin'd  he  tarried  too  long  : 
Then  all  the  Troop  mourned  and  homeward  returned, 

For  Cynthia  scorned  to  smile,  or  to  frown  ; 
Thus  they  did  gather  May^  all  the  long  Summer-day, 

And  at  Night  went  away  with  a  Green-Gown. 

The  Ballad  of  King  JOHN  and  the  Abbot 

— _ — I 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  29 

I'LL  tell  you  a  Story,  a  Story  anon, 
Of  a  Noble  Prince,  and  his  Name  was  YJn%John; 
For  he  was  a  Prince,  a  Prince  of  great  might, 
He  held  up  great  Wrongs,  and  he  put  down  great  Right, 
Derry  down,  down,  hey  derry  down. 

I'll  tell  you  a  Story,  a  Story  so  merry, 
Concerning  the  Abbot  of  Canterbury  ; 
And  of  his  House-keeping  and  high  Renown, 
Which  made  him  repair  to  fair  London  Town. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

How  now,  Brother  Abbot !  'tis  told  unto  me, 
That  thou  keep'st  a  far  better  House  than  I ; 
And  for  thy  House-keeping  and  high  Renown, 
I  fear  thou  hast  Treason  against  my  Crown. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

I  hope  my  Liege,  that  you  owe  me  no  Grudge, 
For  spending  of  my  true  gotten  Goods  ; 
If  thou  dost  not  answer  me  Questions  Three, 
Thy  Head  shall  be  taken  from  thy  Body. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

When  I  am  set  on  my  Steed  so  high, 
With  my  Crown  of  Gold  upon  my  Head ; 
Amongst  all  my  Nobility,  with  Joy  and  much  Mirth, 
Thou  must  tell  me  to  One  Penny  what  I  am  Worth. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

And  the  next  Question  you  must  not  flout, 
How  long  I  shall  be  Riding  the  World  about  ? 
And  the  Third  Question  thou  must  not  shrink, 
But  tell  to  me  truly  what  I  do  think. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

O  These  are  hard  Questions  for  my  shallow  Wit, 
For  I  cannot  answer  your  Grace  as  yet, 
But  if  you  will  give  me  Three  days  space, 
I'll  do  my  Endeavour  to  answer  your  Grace. 
Derry  down^  &c. 


30  SONGS  Compleat, 

0  Three  Days  space  I  will  thee  give, 

For  that  is  the  longest  day  thou  hast  to  Live ; 
And  if  thou  dost  not  answer  these  Questions  right, 
Thy  Head  shall  be  taken  from  thy  Body  quite. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

And  as  the  Shepherd  was  going  to  his  Fold, 
He  spy'd  the  old  Abbot  come  riding  along ; 
How  now  Master  Abbot,  you're  welcome  home, 
What  News  have  you  brought  from  good  King  John. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

Sad  News,  sad  News,  I  have  thee  to  give, 
For  I  have  but  Three  Days  space  for  to  Live ; 
If  I  do  not  answer  Him  Questions  Three, 
My  Head  will  be  taken  from  my  Body. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

When  He  is  set  on  His  Steed  so  high, 
With  His  Crown  of  Gold  upon  his  Head ; 
Amongst  all  his  Nobility,  with  Joy  and  much  Mirth, 

1  must  tell  Him  to  One  Penny  what  He  is  worth. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

And  the  next  Question  I  must  not  flout, 
How  long  He  shall  be  Riding  the  World  about ; 
And  the  Third  Question  I  must  not  shrink. 
But  tell  to  Him  truly  what  he  does  Think. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

O  Master  did  you  never  hear  it  yet, 
That  a  Fool  may  learn  a  Wise  Man  Wit  ? 
Lend  me  but  your  Horse  and  your  Apparel, 
I'll  ride  to  fair  London  and  answer  the  Quarrel. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

Now  I  am  set  on  my  Steed  so  high, 
With  my  Crown  of  Gold  upon  my  Head ; 
Amongst  all  my  Nobility,  with  Joy  and  much  Mirth, 
Now  tell  me  to  One  Penny  what  I  am  worih. 
Derry  down,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  3 1 

For  Thirty  Pence  our  Saviour  was  Sold, 
Amongst  the  false  Jews,  as  you  have  been  told  ; 
And  Nine  and  Twenty's  the  Worth  of  Thee, 
For  I  think  thou  art  One  Penny  worser  than  he. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

And  the  next  Question  thou  maist  not  flout, 
How  long  I  shall  be  Riding  the  World  about  ? 
You  must  Rise  with  the  Sun,  and  Ride  with  the  same, 
Until  the  next  Morning  he  Rises  again  : 
And  then  1  am  sure,  You  will  make  no  doubt, 
But  in  Twenty  Four  Hours  you'll  Ride  it  about. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

And  the  Third  Question  thou  must  not  shrink, 
But  tell  me  truly  what  I  do  Think  ? 
All  that  I  can  do,  and  'twill  make  your  Heart  Merry, 
For  you  think  I'm  the  Abbot  of  Canterbury, 
But  I'm  his  poor  Shepherd  as  you  may  see, 
And  am  come  to  beg  Pardon  for  he  and  for  me. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

The  King  he  turn'd  him  about,  and  did  Smile, 
Saying  thou  shalt  be  Abbot  the  other  while ; 
O  no  my  Grace,  there  is  no  such  need, 
For  I  can  neither  Write  nor  Read. 
Derry  down,  &c. 

Then  Four  Pounds  a  Week  will  I  give  unto  thee, 
For  this  merry  true  Jest  thou  hast  told  unto  me ; 
And  tell  the  old  Abbot  when  thou  comest  home, 
Thou  hast  brought  him  a  Pardon  from  good  King  John: 
Derry  down,  down,  hey  derry  down* 


SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Catholick  BALLAD  : 

Or,  An  Invitation  to  Popery,  upon  Con 
siderable  Grounds  and  Reasons. 



Since  Pofiry  of  late  is  so  much  in  Debate, 
And  great  strivings  have  been  to  restore  it, 
I  cannot  forbear  only  to  declare, 
That  the  Ballad-makers  are  for  it. 

We'll  dispute  it  no  more,  these  Heretical  Men, 
Have  exposed  our  Books  unto  Laughter; 

So  that  many  do  say  'twill  be  our  best  way 
To  sing  for  the  Cause  hereafter. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  33 

O  the  Catholick  Cause  !  now  assist  me  my  Muse, 

How  earnestly  I  do  desire  thee  ! 
Neither  will  I  Pray  to  St.  Bridget  to  Day, 

But  only  to  thee  to  Inspire  me. 

Whence  should  Purity  come,  but  from  Catholick  Rome  ? 

I  wonder  much  at  your  Folly  ; 
For  St.  Peter  was  there,  and  left  an  old  Chair, 

Enough  to  make  all  the  World  Holy. 

For  this  Sacred  old  Wood  is  so  excellent  good, 

If  Tradition  may  be  believed  ; 
That  whoever  sits  there,  needs  never  more  fear 

The  danger  of  being  deceived. 

If  the  Devil  himself  should  (God  Bless  us)  get  up, 

Tho'  his  Nature  we  know  to  be  Evil ; 
Yet  whilst  he  sat  there,  as  divers  will  swear, 

He  would  be  an  Infallible  Devil. 

Now  who  sits  in  this  Seat  but  our  Father  the  Pope  ? 

So  that  here's  a  plain  Demonstration ; 
As  clear  as  Noon-day,  we're  in  the  right  way, 

And  all  others  are  Doom'd  to  Damnation. 

If  this  will  not  suffice,  yet  to  open  your  Eyes, 

Which  are  blinded  in  bad  Education  ; 
We  have  Arguments  Twenty,  and  Miracles  plenty, 

Enough  to  convince  a  whole  Nation. 

If  you  give  but  good  heed,  you  shall  see  the  Host  bleed, 

And  if  anything  can  perswade  ye ; 
An  Image  shall  Speak,  or  at  least  it  shall  Squeak, 

In  the  Honour  of  our  Lady. 

You  shall  see  without  doubt,  the  Devil  cast  out, 

As  of  old  by  Erra  Pater  ; 
He  shall  skip  about  and  tear,  like  a  Dancing-bear ; 

When  he  feels  the  Holy  Water. 

VOL.  IV.  D  If 

34  SONGS  Compleat, 

If  yet  doubtful  you  are,,  we  have  Relicks  most  r; 

We  can  shew  you  the  Sacred  Manger ; 
Several  Loads  of  the  Cross,  as  good  as  e'er  was, 

To  preserve  your  Souls  from  Danger. 

Should  I  tell  you  of  all,  it  would  move  a  Stone-wall, 

But  I  spare  you  a  little  for  pity ; 
That  each  one  may  prepare,  and  rub  up  his  Ear, 

For  the  Second  Part  of  my  Ditty. 

The  Second  PART.      To  the  same  Tune. 

NOW  listen  again  to  those  things  that  remain, 
They  are  Matters  of  weight  I  assure  you  ; 
And  the  First  thing  I  say,  throw  your  Bibles  away, 
'Tis  impossible  else  for  to  Cure  you. 

O  that  Pestilent  Book  !    Never  on  it  more  look, 

I  wish  I  could  speak  it  out  louder ; 
It  has  done  more  Men  harm,  I  dare  boldly  affirm, 

Than  th'  Invention  of  Guns  and  Powder. 

As  for  Matters 'of  Faith,  believe  what  the  Church  saith, 
But  for  Scriptures  leave  that  to  the  Learned ; 

For  these  are  Edge  Tools,  and  you  Lay-men  are  Fools, 
If  ye  touch  them  y'are  sure  to  be  harmed. 

But  pray  what  is  it  for  that  you  make  all  this  stir  ? 

You  must  Read,  you  must  Hear  and  be  Learned ; 
If  you'll  be  on  our  part,  we  will  teach  you  an  Art, 

That  you  need  not  be  so  much  Concerned. 

Be  the  Church's  good  Son,  and  your  work  is  half  done, 
After  that  you  may  do  your  own  pleasure  ; 

If  your  Beads  you  can  tell,  and  say  Ave  Mary  well, 
Never  doubt  of  the  Heavenly  Treasure. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  35 

For  the  Pope  keeps  the  Keys,  and  can  do  what  he 

And  without  all  peradventure  ; 
If  you  cannot  at  the  Fore,  yet  at  the  Back-dore 

Of  Indulgence  you  may  enter. 

But  First  by  the  way,  you  must  make  a  short  stay, 

At  a  place  call'd  Purgatory ; 
Which  the  Learned  us  tell,  in  the  Buildings  of  Hell, 

Is  about  the  Middlemost  Story. 

'Tis  a  monstrous  Hot  place,  and  a  Mark  of  disgrace, 

In  the  Torment  on't  long  to  endure  ? 
None  are  kept  there  but  Fools,  and  poor  pitiful  Souls, 

Who  can  no  ready  Money  procure. 

For  a  handsome  round  Sum,  you  may  quickly  be  gone, 

For  the  Church  has  wisely  Ordain'd  : 
That  they  who  build  Crosses,  and  pay  well  for  Masses, 

Should  not  there  be  too  long  detain'd. 

So  that  'tis  a  plain  Case,  as  the  Nose  on  ones  Face, 

We  are  in  the  surest  Condition  ; 
And  none  but  poor  Fools  and  some  niggardly  Owls, 

Need  fall  into  utter  Perdition. 

What  aileth  you  then,  O  ye  Great  and  Rich  Men, 

That  ye  will  not  hearken  to  Reason  ; 
Since  as  long  as  y'have  Pence,  ye  need  scruple  no 

Be  it  Murder,  Adultrey,  or  Treason. 

And  ye  sweet  natur'd  Women,  who  hold  all  things 

My  Addresses  to  you  are  most  hearty  ; 
And  to  give  you  your  due,  you  are  to  us  most  true, 

And  we  hope  we  shall  gain  the  whole  Party. 

If  you  happen  to  Fall,  your  Pennance  shall  be  small, 

And  although  you  cannot  forego  it ; 
We  have  for  you  a  Cure,  if  of  this  you  be  sure 

To  Confess  before  you  go  to  it. 

D  2  There 

36  SONGS  Compleat, 

There  is  one  Reason  yet,  which  I  cannot  omit, 
To  those  who  affect  the  French  Nation  ; 

Hereby  we  advance  the  Religion  of  France, 
The  Religion  that's  only  in  Fashion. 

If  these  Reasons  prevail,  (as  how  can  they  fail  ?) 

To  have  Popery  entertain'd  ; 
You  cannot  conceive,  and  will  hardly  believe, 

What  Benefits  hence  may  be  gain'd. 

For  the  Pope  shall  us  Bless,  (that's  no  small  Happiness) 

'And  again  we  shall  see  restor'd 
The  Italian  Tiade,  which  formerly  made 

"This  Land  to  be  so  much  ador'd. 

O  the  Pictures  and  Rings,  the  Beads  and  fine  things, 

The  good  Words  as  sweet  as  Honey ; 
All  this  and  much  more  shall  be  brought  to  our  Door, 

For  a  little  dull  English  Money. 

Then  shall  Justice  and  Love,  and  what  can  move, 

Be  restor'd  again  to  our  Britain ; 
And  Learning  so  common,  that  every  Old  Woman 

Shall  say  her  Prayers  in  Latin. 

Then  .the  Church  shall  bear  sway,  and  the  State  shall 


i Which  is  now  look'd  upon  as  a  Wonder; 
And  the  Proudest  of  Kings,  and  all  Temporal  things, 
Shall  submit  and  truckle  under. 

And  the  Parliament  too,  who  have  tak'n  us  to  do, 
And  have  handl'd  us  with  so  much  Terror ; 

May  chance  on  that  score  ('tis  no  time  to  say  more) 
They  may  chance  to  acknowledge  their  Error. 

If  any  Man  yet  shall  have  so  little  Wit, 

As  still  to  be  Refractory  ; 
I  swear  by  the  Mass,  he  is  a  meer  Ass 

And  so  "there's  an  end  of  a  Story. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tivc.  37 

Sir  FRANCIS  DRAKE  :  Or,  Eighty  Eight. 
To  the  same  Time. 

SOME  Years  of  late,  in  Eighty  Eight, 
As  I  do  well  remember  a  ; 
It  was,  some  say,  on  the  Ninth  of  May, 
And  some  say  in  September  a. 

The  Spanish  Train  launch'd  forth  a-main, 

With  many  a  fine  Bravado  ; 
Whereas  they  thought,  but  it  prov'd  nought, 

The  Invincible  Armado. 

There  was  a  little  Man  that  dwelt  in  Spain, 

That  shot  well  in  a  Gun  a ; 
Don  Pedro  height,  as  Black  a  Wight, 

As  the  Knight  of  the  Sun  a. 

King  Phillip  made  him  Admiral, 

And  bad  him  not  to  stay  a  ; 
But  to  destroy  both  Man  and  Boy, 

And  so  to  come  away  a. 

The  Queen  was  then  at  Tillbury, 
What  could  we  more  desire  a  ; 

Sir  Francis  Drake,  for  Her  sweet  sake, 
Did  set  'em  all  on  Fire  a. 

Away  they  ran  by  Sea  and  Land, 
So  that  one  Man  slew  Three-score  a ; 

And  had  not  they  all  run  away, 
O  my  Soul,  we  had  killed  more  a. 

Then  let  them  neither  brag  nor  boast, 

For  if  they  come  again  a  ; 
Let  them  take  heed  they  do  not  speed, 

As  they  did  they  knew  when  a. 

38  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  BALLAD  called, 

The  Jovial  Bear- ward.    To  the  same  T^me. 

XHO'  it  may  seem  rude 
For  me  to  intrude 
e  my  Bears  by  chance  a ; 
Twere  sport  for  a  King, 
If  they  could  Sing 
As  well  as  they  can  Dance  a. 

Then  to  put  you  out 

Of  fear  or  doubt ; 
I  came  from  St.  Katherine  a  ; 

These  Dancing  Three> 

By  the  help  of  me, 
Who  am  keeper  of  the  Sine  a. 

We  sell  good  Ware, 

And  we  need  not  care 
Tho'  Court  and  Country,  knew  it 

Our  Ale's  o'th'  best,  . 

And  each  good  Guest 
Prays  for  their  Souls  that  Brew  it 

For  any  Ale-house, 

We  care  not  a  Louse, 
Nor  Tavern  in  all  the  Town  a ; 

Nor  the  Vintry  Cranes, 

Nor  St.  Clement  Danes, 
Nor  the  Devil  can  put  us  down  a  ; 

Who  has  once  here  been, 

Comes  hither  agen, 
The  Liquor  is  so  mighty ; 

Beer  strong  and  stale, 

And  so  is  our  Ale, 
And  it  burns  like  Aqua  Vita. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  tive.  39 

The  Wives  of  Wapping, 

They  trudge  to  our  Tapping 
And  still  our  Ale  desire  a ; 

And  there  sit  and  Drink, 

Till  they  Spew  and  Stink, 
And  often  Piss  out  the  Fire  a. 

From  Morning  to  Night, 

And  about  to  Day-light, 
They  sit,  and  never  grudge  it ; 

Till  the  Fish-Wifes  join 

Their  single  Coin, 
And  the  Tinker  pawns  his  Budget 

If  their  Brains  be  not  well, 

Or  Bladders  do  swell, 
To  ease  them  of  their  Burden  ; 

My  Lady  will  come 

With  a  Bowl  and  a  Broom, 
And  her  Hand-Maid  with  a  Jordan. 

From  Court  we  invite 

Lord,  Lady,  and  Knight, 
Squire,  Gentlemen,  Yeomen  and  Groom ; 

And  all  our  stiff  Drinkers, 

Smiths,  Porters  and  Tinkers, 
And  the  Beggars  shall  give  you  room. 

SONGS  Compleat, 


OH  London  is  a  fine  Town,  and  a  gallant  City, 
'Tis  Govern'd  by  the  Scarlet  Gown,  come  listen 

to  my  Ditty ; 

This  City  has  a  Mayor,  this  Mayor  is  a  Lord, 
He  Governeth  the  Citizens  upon  his  own  accord  : 
He  boasteth  his  Gentility,  and  how  Nobly  he  was  born  ; 
His  Arms  are  three  Ox-heads •,  and  his  Crest  a  Rampant 

The  first  Journey  his  Lordship  takes,  is  to  Westminster- 

Attended  by  twelve  Companies,  for  he  must  have  'em 

The  Barges  are  made  all  fine  and  gay,  for  his  Lordship 
and  the  best, 

And  Dung-boats  and  Lyters  provided  for  the  rest. 

Then  at  the  Exchequer  he's  sworn  upon  a  Shoe-soal, 
That  he  will  be  no  wiser  Man  than  was  his  Brother 


The  Sword  is  born  before  'em  up  and  down  the  Stairs, 
To  Fright  away  the  little  Boys  that  laugh  at  our  Lord- 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  41 

And  when  that  is  ended,  home  again  he  comes, 
With  joyful  Noise  upon  the  Thames  of  Trumpets  and 
of  Drums  ;  [j°gs> 

His  Lordship  lands  at  /Wj- Wharf,  and  on  along  he 
Attended  by  his  Companies,  as  Hungry  as  any  Dogs. 

Then  in  comes  the  Carver,  and  boldly  falls  to  work, 

With  Knife  like  Scimiter  as  fierce  as  any  Turk ; 

He  hit  upon  the  Goose-bone,  and  turn'd  both  Edge 

and  point, 
Till  he  look'd  upon  my  Lord-Mayor,  he  could  not  hit 

the  Joint. 

Then  up  came  Custard  with  Twenty  Four  Nukes, 
As  you  may  find  recorded  in  John  Stow's  Books ; 
And  why  it  was  so  big,  if  you  wou'd  know  the  Reason, 
It  was  to  keep  their  Chaps  at  work  that  would  be  prat 
ing  Treason. 

Then  they  go  to  Greenwitch  all  in  the  City  Barge, 
And  there  they  have  a  Noble  Treat  all  at  the  City 

Charge ; 
And  when  they  come  to  Cuckold' s-Point,  they  make  a 

Gallant  Show, 
Their  Wives  bid  the  Musick  play  Cuckolds-all-a-row. 

Then  they  go  to  Paul's  Church  e'er  Morning-Prayer 

begins,  [Pins ; 

And  as  they  go  along  the  Street,  they  stoop  to  pick  up 

But  if  you'd  know,  I'll  tell  you  the  Moral  Reason  of  it, 

They  that  would  to  Riches  grow,  must  stoop  for  little 


My  Lord-Mayor  rides  along  the  Street  like  unto  a  Law 
maker,  [Baker ; 

With  Forty  Catch-poles  at  his  Arse,  to  Prosecute  the 

And  when  he  comes  to  the  Baker's  Stall,  and  finds  his 
Bread  too  light, 

He  sends  it  home  to  his  own  House,  to  Feast  both 
Lord  and  Knight. 


42  SONGS  Compleat, 

Then  to   the  Sessions-House  they  go,  the  Sessions  for 

to  keep, 

Until  that  the  Recorder  comes  they  all  are  fast  asleep ; 
They  call  up  their  Juries  by  Twelves  and  by  Twelves, 
And  if  they  Hang  up  no  Man,  they  may  go  Hang 


So  then  they  borrow  Boots  and  Spurs,  and  out  of  Town 

they  ride, 

To  see  the  Bears  baited  on  the  Bank  side  ; 
And  when  that  they  have  done,  they  all  return  again, 
Like  so  many  Apes,  with  each  his  Golden-Chain. 

Then  to  hear  a  Sermon  once  a  Year,  he  rides  unto  the 

And  there  sits  full  three  Hours  long,  and  brings  away 

but  little ; 
And  when  that  he  comes  home,  he  sits  down  at  his 

And  if  he  has  not  Minc'd  Pyes,  his  Cheer's  not  worth 

a  Turd. 

My  Lady  says  unto  my  Lord  when  all  the  Guests  are 

I  do  intend  to  Morrow  next  to  invite  my  Friend  Sir 


For  I  don't  think  it  fit  always  to  have  Trades-men, 
I  pray  therefore  let  me  rub  in  a  Courtier  now  and  then. 

My  Lady  boldly  ask'd  my  Lord  what  dishes  she  should 

To  entertain  her  friend  Sir  John,  that  was  so  fine  and 

My  Lord  he  nam'd  a  Calves-head,  at  which  she  made 

a  Pish, 
And  swore  she'd  have  a  Turkey-cock,  for  she  loved  a 

standing  Dish. 

Next  once  a  year  into  Essex  a  Hunting  they  do  go, 
To  see  'em  pass  along,  O  'tis  a  most  pretty  show ; 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


Through  Cheap-side  and  Fenchurch-street,  and  so  to  Aid- 
gate  Pump, 

Each  Man  with's  Spurs  in's  Horses  sides,  and  his  Back- 
Sword  cross  his  Rump. 

My  Lord  he  takes  a  staff  in  Hand,  to  beat  the  Bushes 


I  must  confess  it  was  a  work  he  ne'er  had  done  before  ; 
A    Creature    bounceth    from  a  Bush,  which    made 

them  all  to  Laugh, 
My  Lord  he  cry'd  a  Hare,  a  Hare,  but  it  proved  an 

Essex  Calf. 

And  when  they  had  done  their  Sport,  they  came  to 

London,  where  they  dwell ; 
Their  Faces  all  so  torn  and  scratch'd,  their  Wives  scarce 

knew  them  well ; 

For  'twas  a  very  great  Mercy  so  many  'scap'd  alive, 
For  of  Twenty  Saddles  carried  out,  they  brought  again 

but  Five. 



44  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Rise,  arise,  my  Juggy,  my  Puggy, 
Arise,  get  up  my  Dear ; 
The  Night  is  Cold, 
It  bloweth,  it  snoweth, 
/  must  be  Lodged  here. 

My  Juggy,  my  Puggy, 

My  Honey,  my  Bunny, 
My  Love,  my  Dove,  my  Dear ; 

O  the  Night  is  Cold, 

It  Bloweth,  it  Snoweth, 
/  must  be  Lodged  here. 

Be  gone,  be  gone,  my  Jockey,  my  Jockey, 
Be  gone,  be  gone,  my  Dear ; 

The  Night  is  warm, 

'Twill  do  you  no  harm, 
You  cannot  be  Lodged  here. 

My  Jockey,  my  Jockey, 
My  Willy,  my  Billy, 
My  Joy,  my  Joy,  my  Dear ; 
O  the  Night  it  is  warm,  &c. 

Farewel,  farewel,  my  Juggy,  my  Puggy, 
Farewel  my  Love,  my  Dear  ; 

Now  will  I  be  gone  from  whence  I  come, 
If  I  cannot  be  Lodged  here. 
My  Juggy,  &c, 

Return,  return,  my  Willy  my  Billy, 
Return  my  Love  and  Dear ; 

The  Weather  doth  change, 

Then  seem  not  strange, 
Thou  shalt  be  Lodged  here. 

My  Jockey,  &c. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  tive. 



To  curb  rising  Thoughts. 

was  an  Old  Woman  that  had  but  One  Son, 
|         And  he  had  neither  Land  nor  Fee ; 
He  took  great  Pains, 
But  got  little  Gains, 
Yet  fain  a  Landlord  he  would  be, 

With  afadariddle  la,  fa  la  da  riddle  la,  fa  la  la  fa  la 
la  re. 

And  as  he  was  a  going  Home, 
He  met  his  Old  Mother  upon  the  High-way  j 
O  Mother,  quoth  he, 
Your  Blessing  grant  me, 
Thus  the  Son  to  the  Mother  did  say. 
With  a  fa,  &c. 

I  ha' 

46  SONGS  Compleat, 

I  ha'  begg'd  Butter-milk  all  this  long  Day, 
But  I  hope  I  shan't  be  a  Beggar  long ; 

For  I've  more  Wit  come  into  this  Pate, 
Then  e'er  I  had  when  I  was  Young. 
With  a  fa,  &c. 

This  Butter- milk  I  will  it  sell, 

A  Penny  for  it  I  shall  have  you  shall  see ; 
With  that  Penny  I  will  buy  me  some  Eggs, 
I  shall  have  Seven  for  my  Penny. 
With  a  fa,  &c. 


And  those  Seven  Eggs  I'll  set  under  a  Hen, 

Perhaps  Seven  Cocks  they  may  chance  for  to  be  ; 

And  when  those  Seven  Cocks  are  Seven  Capons, 
There  will  be  Seven  Half-Crowns  for  me. 
With  a  fa,  &c. 

P.ut  as  he  was  going  Home, 

Accounting  up  of  his  Riches  all ; 
His  Foot  it  stumbled  against  a  Stone, 

Down  came  Butter-milk  Pitcher  and  all. 
With  a  fa,  ^. 


His  Pitcher  was  broke,  and  his  Eggs  were  dispatch1  d. 
This  'tis  to  count  Chickens  before  they  are  Hatch  d. 
With  a  fa  da,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  47 

The  Reformed  Drinker. 

y  Hearts  of  Gold, 
Let  us  be  Merry  and  Wise  ; 
It  is  a  Proverb  of  Old, 

Suspicion  hath  double  Eyes  : 
Whatsoever  we  say  or  do, 

Let's  not  Drink  to  disturb  the  Brain ; 
Let's  Laugh  for  an  Hour  or  Two, 
And  ne'er  be  Drunk  again. 

A  Gup  of  old  Sack  is  good, 

To  drive  the  Cold  Winter  away  ; 
Twill  Cherish  and  Comfort  the  Blood 

Most  when  a  Man's  Spirits  decay  : 
But  he  that  doth  Drink  too  much, 

Of  his  Head  he  will  complain ; 
Then  let's  have  a  gentle  Touch, 

And  never  be  drunk  again. 

Good  Claret  was  made  for  Man, 

But  Man  was  not  made  for  it ; 
Let's  be  Merry  as  we  can, 

So  we  Drink  not  away  our  Wit : 


48  SONGS  Compleat, 

Good  Fellowship  is  abus'd, 

And  Wine  will  infect  the  Brain  ; 
But  we'll  have  it  better  us'd, 
And  ne'er  be  drunk  again. 

When  with  good  Fellows  we  meet, 

A  Quart  among  Three  or  Four ; 
Twill  make  us  stand  on  our  Feet, 

While  others  lye  Drunk  on  the  Floor 
Then  Drawer  go  fill  a  Quart, 

And  let  it  be  Claret  in  Grain  ; 
'Twill  Cherish  and  Comfort  the  Heart, 

But  we'll  ne'er  be  Drunk  again. 

Here's  a  Health  to  our  Noble  King, 

And  to  the  Queen  of  his  Heart; 
Let's  Laugh  and  Merrily  Sing, 

And  he's  a  Coward  that  will  start : 
Here's  a  Health  to  our  General, 

And  to  those  that  were  in  Spain; 
And  to  our  Colonel, 

And  we'll  ne'er  be  Drunk  again. 

Enough's  as  good  as  a  Feast 

If  a  Man  did  but  Measure  know  ; 
A  Drunkard's  worse  than  a  Beast, 

For  he'll  Drink  till  he  cannot  go  : 
If  a  Man  could  Time  recal, 

In  a  Tavern  that's  spent  in  vain ; 
We'd  learn  to  be  Sober  all, 

And  never  be  Drunk  again. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  49 

A  true  Character  of  sundry  TRADES  and 
CALLINGS  :  or  a  new  Ditty  of  Innocent 
Mirth.  To  the  same  Time. 

XT  OW  Gentlemen  sit  ye  all  Merry, 
1  >     I'll  Sing  you  a  Song  of  a  Want; 
I'll  make  you  as  Merry  as  may  be, 

Tho'  Money  begins  to  grow  scant : 
A  Woman  without  e'er  a  Tongue, 

She  never  can  Scold  very  loud ; 
'Tis  just  such  another  great  Want, 

When  a  Fidler  wants  his  Croud  : 
Good  People  I  tell  unto  you, 

These  Lines  they  are  absolute  New ; 
For  I  hate  and  despise  the  telling  of  Lies, 

This  Ditty  is  Merry  and  True. 

A  Ship  that's  without  e'er  a  Sail, 

May  be  driven  the  Lord  knows  whither ; 
'Tis  just  such  another  sad  Want, 

When  a  Shoemaker  wants  his  Leather : 
A  Man  that  has  got  but  One  Leg, 

Will  make  but  a  pitiful  Runner  ; 
And  he  that  has  no  Eyes  in  his  Head, 

Will  make  but  a  sorrowful  Gunner  : 
Good  People  I  tell  unto  you, 

These  Lines  they  are  absolute  New  ; 
For  I  hate  and  despise  the  telling  of  Lies ', 

This  Ditty  is  Merry  and  True. 

VOL.  iv.  E  The 

50  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Second  PART.      To  the  same  Tune. 

A    Doctor  without  any  Stomach, 
JL±  Will  make  but  a  pitiful  Dinner ; 
And  he  that  has  got  no  Victuals  to  eat, 

Will  quickly  look  thinner  and  thinner  : 
A  Bell  without  ever  a  Clapper, 

Will  make  but  a  sorrowful  Sound  ; 
And  he  that  has  no  Land  of  his  own, 

May  work  on  another  Man's  Ground  : 
Good  People  I  tell  unto  you, 

These  Lines  they  are  absolute  New  ; 
For  I  hate  and  despise  the  telling  of  Lies, 

This  Ditty  is  Merry  and  True. 

A  Blacksmith  without  his  Bellows, 

He  need  not  to  rise  very  soon  ; 
And  he  that  has  no  Cloaths  to  put  on, 

May  lie  a  Bed  till  'tis  Noon  : 
An  Inn-keeper  without  any  Custom, 

Will  never  get  store  of  Wealth  ; 
And  if  he  has  never  a  Sign  to  hang  up, 

He  may  e'en  go  Hang  up  himself : 
Good  People,  &c. 

A  Miller  without  any  Stones, 

He  is  but  a  sorrowful  Soul ; 
And  if  that  he  has  no  Corn  to  Grind, 

He  need  not  stand  taking  of  Toll : 
The  Taylor  we  know  he  is  loth 

To  take  any  Cabbage  at  all ; 
If  he  has  no  Silk,  Stuff,  or  Cloth, 

To  dp  that  good  Office  withal  : 
Good  People,  &c. 

A  Woman  without  e'er  a  Fault, 
She  like  a  bright  Star  will  appear ; 

But  a  Brewer  without  any  Mault, 
Will  make  but  pitiful  Beer. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  5 1 

A  Man  that  has  got  but  one  Shirt, 
When  e'er  it  is  wash'd  for  his  Hide ; 

I  hope  it  can  be  no  great  hurt, 
To  lye  in  his  Bed  till  'tis  dry'd : 

Good  People,  &c. 

A  Mountebank  without  his  Fools, 

And  a  Skip-kennel  turn'd  out  of  Place  ; 
A  Tinker  without  any  Tools, 

They  are  all  in  a  sorrowful  case  : 
You  know  that  a  Dish  of  good  Meat, 

It  is  the  true  stay  of  Man's  Life  ; 
But  he  that  has  nothing  to  Eat, 

He  need  not  to  draw  out  his  Knife  : 
Good  People,  &c. 

A  Pedlar  without  e'er  a  Stock, 

It  makes  him  look  pitiful  Blue  ; 
A  Shepherd  without  e'er  a  Flock, 

Has  little  or  nothing  to  do  : 
A  Farmer  without  any  Corn, 

He  neither  can  give,  sell  or  lend ; 
A  Huntsman  without  e'er  a  Horn, 

His  Wife  she  must  stand  his  good  Friend : 
Good  People,  &c. 

A  Plow-man  that  has  ne'er  a  Plow, 

I  think  he  may  live  at  his  ease  ; 
A  Dairy  without  e'er  a  Cow, 

Will  make  but  bad  Butter  and  Cheese  : 
A  Man  that  is  pitiful  Poor, 

Has  little  or  nothing  to  lose ; 
And  he  that  has  never  a  Foot, 

It  saves  him  the  buying  of  Shoes  : 
Good  People  I  tell  unto  you, 

These  Lines  they  are  absolute  Neiv  ; 
For  I  hate  and  despise  the  telling  of  Lies, 

This  Ditty  is  Merry  and  True. 

E   2 

52  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Warren  without  e'er  a  Cunny, 

Is  Barren  and  so  much  the  worse  ; 
And  he  that  is  quite  without  Money, 

Can  have  no  great  need  of  a  Purse  : 
I  hope  there  is  none  in  this  place, 

That  now  is  not  pleas'd  with  this  Song ; 
Come  buy  up  my  Ballads  apace, 

And  I'll  pack  up  my  Awls  and  begone : 
Good  People  I  tell  unto  you, 

These  Lines  they  are  absolute  New  ; 
For  I  hate  and  despise  the  telling  of  Lies, 

This  Ditty  is  Merry  and  True. 

The  New  ENGLAND  Ballad. 

WILL  you  please  to  give  ear  a  while  untp  me, 
And  streight  I  chill  tell  you  where  c'h'  have 

C'ha  been  to  New  England,  but  now  cham  come  o'er, 
I'ch  think  they  shall  catch  me  go  thither  no  more. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  53 

Before  Tse  went  thither,  Lord,  how  Yoke  did  tell 
How  Vishes  did  grow,  and  how  Birds  did  dwell, 
All  one  amongst  t'other,  in  the  Wood  and  the  Water, 
Ise  thought  'triad  been  true,  but  I  found   no    such 

When  first  Ise  did  Land,  they  mazed  me  quite, 
\nd  'twas  of  all  days  on  a  Saturday  Night ; 
.se  wondered  to  see  strange  Buildings  were  there, 
Twas  all  like  the  standings  at  Woodbury  Fair. 

Well,  that  Night  I  slept  till  near  Prayer  time, 
Next  Morning  I  wonder'd  I  heard  no  Bells  Chime ; 
At  which  I  did  ask,  and  the  Reason  I  found, 
Twas  because  they  had  ne'er  a  Bell  in  the  Town. 

At  last  being  warned,  to  Church  we  repair'd, 
rVhere  I  did  think  certain  we  should  have  some  Pray'rs  ; 
But  the  Parson  there  no  such  matter  did  teach, 

They  scorn'd  to  Pray,  for  all  one  could  Preach. 

The  first  thing  they  did,  a  Psalm  they  did  Zing, 

ise  pluck'd  out  my  Psalm-Book  I  with  me  did  bring ; 

And  tumbled  to  seek  him  'cause  they  caw'd  him  by's 

But  they'd  got  a  new  Zong  to  the  Tune  of  the  same. 

When  Sermon  was  ended,  was  a  Child  to  Baptize, 
Bout  Zixteen  Years  old,  as  Yolks  did  zurmise ; 
He  had  neither  Godfather,  nor  Godmother,  yet  was 

quiet  and  still, 
But  the  Priest  durst  not  Cross  him,  for  fear  of  ill  will. 

Ah,  Sirrah,  thought  I,  and  to  Dinner  Ise  went, 
And  gave  the  Lord  Thanks  for  what  he  had  sent ; 
Next  day  was  a  Wedding,  the  Brideman  my  Friend, 
Did  kindly  invite  me,  so  thither  Ise  wend. 

But  this  above  all,  me  to  wonder  did  bring, 
To  see  Magistrate  Marry  them,  and  had  ne'er  a  Ring ; 
Ise  thought  they  would  call  me  the  Woman  to  give, 
But  I  think  the  Man  stole  her,  they  ask'd  no  Man  leave. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

Now  this  was  New  Dorchester,  as  they  told  unto  me, 
A  Town  very  Famous  in  all  that  Country ; 
They  said  'twas  new  Buildings,  I  grant  it  is  true, 
Yet  Methinks  Old  Dorchester's  as  fine  as  the  New. 

Well  there  I  staid  amongst  'em  till  ch'  was  weary  at 

my  Heart, 

At  length  there  came  Shipping,  I  got  leave  to  depart ; 
But  when  all  was  ended,  and  ch'  was  coming  away, 
I  had  Threescore  good  Shillings  at  last  for  to  pay. 

But  when  I  saw  this,  I  Swore  on  the  more, 
That  I'd  stay  there  no  longer  to  Swear  upon  Shoar ; 
Ise  bid  a  Farewel  to  Fowlers  and  Fishers, 
Praying  God  to  bless  Old  England  and  all  the  good 

The  Ballad  of  FOX-Jfuntmg, 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  5  5 

TO  Hunt  the  Fox  is  an  Old  Sport, 
Used  both  in  City  and  Court ; 
Nor  are  the  Academicks  free, 
No  Beast  they  chase  so  much  as  he  : 
They  that  think  all  Pleasures  vain, 
Will  sometimes  follow ,  will  sometimes  follow ',  will 
sometimes  follow  the  Fox's  Train. 

The  Gallant  who  each  Hour  invents 
Some  pretty  pleasing  Compliments  ; 
And  thinks  no  Phrase  so  neat  and  pure, 
As  Votres  humble  Serviteur : 

Slights  his  Lady's  nice  Disdain, 

And  sometimes  follows,  &c. 

The  Plodding  Student  that  doth  look 
Upon  no  Object  but  his  Book  ; 
And  thinks  that  all  he  doth  Project, 
Too  wise  is  for  Old  Men  t'effect :  * 

Will  sometimes  ease  his  troubled  Brain, 

By  following,  &c. 

The  Clergy-men  live  Merry  Lives, 
They  get  fine  Livings  and  fine  Wives  ; 
The  Church's  State  they  finely  Rule, 
Yet  with  a  Cup  their  Zeal  they'll  cool : 

The  Poet  writes  no  pleasant  Strain, 

Unless  he  follows,  &c. 

Physicians  that  with  Skill  profound, 
Can  make  the  sickly  Patient  sound  ; 
They  Cure  one  Grief,  and  leave  a  worse, 
Call'd  the  Consumption  of  the  Purse  : 

Yet  once  a  Month  will  not  refrain, 

But  follows  still,  &c. 

The  Lawyers,  as  I  understand, 

Can  warrant  your  Case,  if  it  be  good  ; 


56  SONGS  Compleat, 

And  tempting  Fees  on  both  sides  take, 
And  new  Demurs  can  make  : 

Although  his  chief  delight  is  Gain, 

He  follows  still,  &c. 

The  little  Fox  at  length  is  found, 
Where  he  lies  lurking  under  Ground ; 
He  Earths  himself  in  Cellars  deep, 
When  he  from  Mortals  View  would  creep  : 

Till  gentle  slumber  charms  his  Brain, 

And  then  concludes,  and  then  concludes  the  Fox's  Train. 

The  Longing  MAID. 

Pleasant  and  Dwertive. 



THERE  was  a  Maid  the  other  Day, 
That  sighed  sore  God  wot ; 
And  said  all  Wives  might  sport  and  play, 

But  Maidens  they  may  not : 
Full  Fifteen  have  I  liv'd  she  said, 

Poor  Soul,  since  I  was  Born  : 
And  if  I  chance  to  Die  a  Maid, 
Apollo  is  forsworn. 

Oh,  Oh,  for  a  Husband, 

Still  this  was  her  Song ; 
I  will  have  a  Husband,  I  will  have  a  Husband, 

A  Husband  Old  or  Young. 

An  Ancient  Suitor  to  her  came, 

His  Beard  was  almost  Grey  ; 
Tho'  he  was  Old  and  she  was  Young, 

She  could  no  longer  stay  : 
Unto  her  Mother  went  this  Maid, 

And  told  her  by  and  by ; 
That  she  a  Husband  needs  must  have, 

She  had  a  reason  why  ; 
Oh,  Oh,  &c. 


58  SONGS  Compleat, 

She  had  not  been  a  Wedded  Wife 

One  quarter  of  a  Year ; 
But  she  was  weary  of  this  Life, 

And  grew  into  a  Jeer  : 
The  Old  Man  snorting  by  her  side, 

She'd  nought  but  Sigh  and  Groan ; 
Did  ever  Woman  this  abide, 

'Tis  better  lye  alone. 

Oh,  Oh,  Oh  what  a  Husband,  what  a  Life  lead  I, 
Out,  out  of  such  a  Husband,  such  a  Husband, 
Fie,  fie,  fie,  fie,  fie,  fie. 

To  live  a  Wedded  Life,  she  said, 

A  Twelve  Month,  'tis  too  long ; 
As  I  have  done,  poor  Soul,  she  cry'd, 

That  am  both  Fair  and  Young : 
When  other  Wives  can  have  their  Will, 

They  are  not  like  to  me  ; 
I  mean  to  go  and  try  my  Skill, 

And  seek  a  Remedy  : 

Oh,  Oh,  Oh  what  a  Husband,  what  a  Life  lead  I, 
Out,  out  of  such  a  Husband,  such  a  Htisband, 
fie,  fie,  fie,  fie,  fie,  fie. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


A  Woman  once  found  out. 

THO'  bootless  I  must  needs  Complain, 
My  Fate  is  so  extream  ; 
I  iov'd,  and  was  belov'd  again, 

Yet  all  was  but  a  Dream, 
For  as  that  love  was  quickly  got, 

So  it  was  quickly  gone ; 
I'll  touch  no  more  a  Flame  so  hot. 
Pd  rather  lie  alone. 

No  Creature,  be  she  ne'er  so  Fair, 

Shall  any  more  beguile 
My  Fancy  with  a  feigned  Tear, 

Nor  tempt  me  with  a  Smile ; 


SONGS  Compleat, 

I'll  never  think  Affection  feign'd, 

That  is  so  fairly  shewn  ; 
I'll  touch  no  more  a  Flame  so  hot, 

I'd  rather  lie  alone. 

Should  now  the  little  God  conspire 

Again  t'entrap  my  Mind  ; 
And  strive  to  set  my  Heart  on  Fire, 

Alas,  the  Boy's  too  Blind  : 
For  such  I'll  never  venture  Smiles, 

Nor  hazard  Mirth  for  none  ; 
Nor  yet  regard  a  Woman's  Wiles, 

fd  rather  lie  alone. 

The  blazing  Torch  is  soon  burnt  out, 

The  Diamond's  light  abides  ; 
The  Fire  her  Glory  hurls  about, 

The  Woman  her  Virtue  hides  : 
That  spark,  (if  any  should  be  mine) 

That  else  shews  like  to  none  ; 
For  if  to  e'ery  Eye  she  shine, 

I'd  rather  lie  alone. 

No  Woman  shou'd  deceive  my  Thought, 

With  Colours  not  in  Grain  ; 
Nor  put  a  Love  so  slightly  wrought, 

Into  my  Hands  again  : 
I'll  pay  no  more  so  dear  for  Wit, 

I'll  live  upon  my  own  ; 
Nor  shall  Affection  trouble  it, 

Pd  rather  lie  alone. 

And  so  I'll  set  my  Heart  at  rest, 

My  loving  Labour's  lost ; 
I'll  be  no  more  so  rarely  Blest, 

To  be  so  strangely  crost : 
The  Love-lost  Turtle  so  doth  die, 

The  Phenix  is  but  One  ; 
They  seek  no  Mates,  no  more  will  I, 

Pd  rather  lie  alone. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 


A  Ballad  of  all  the  TRADES. 
Set  by  Mr.  AKEROYDE. 

OH  the  Miller,  the  dusty,  musty  Miller, 
The  Miller,  that  beareth  on  his  Back ; 
He  never  goes  to  Measure  Meal, 

But  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid  holds 
ope  the  sack. 

O  the  Baker,  the  bonny,  bonny  Baker, 

The  Baker  that  is  so  full  of  Sin  ; 
He  never  heats  his  Oven  hot, 

But  he  thrusts,  but  he  thrusts,  but  he  thrusts  his 
Maiden  in. 

O  the  Brewer,  the  lusty,  lusty  Brewer, 

The  Brewer  that  Brews  Ale  and  Beer ; 
He  never  heats  his  Liquor  hot, 

But  he  takes,  but  he  takes,  but  he  takes  his  Maid 
by  the  Geer. 


62  SONGS  Compleat, 

O  the  Butcher,  the  bloody,  bloody  Butcher, 
The  Butcher  that  sells  both  Beef  and  Bone  ; 

He  never  grinds  his  Slaught'ring  Knife, 

But  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid  must 
turn  his  Stone. 

O  the  Weaver,  the  wicked,  wicked  Weaver, 

That  followeth  a  weary  Trade  \ 
He  never  shoots  his  Shuttle  right, 

But  he  shoots,  but  he  shoots,  but  he  shoots  first  at 
his  Maid. 

O  the  barber,  the  neat  and  nimble  Barber, 

Whose  Trade  is  ne'er  the  worse  ; 
He  never  goes  to  Wash  and  Shave, 

But  he  trims,  but  he  trims,  but  he  trims  his  Maiden 

O  the  Taylor,  the  fine  and  frisking  Taylor, 
The  Taylor  that  gives  so  good  regard ; 

He  never  goes  to  measure  Lace, 

But  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid  holds 
out  his  Yard. 

O  the  Blaksmith,  the  lusty,  lusty  Blacksmith, 

The  best  of  all  good  Fellows ; 
He  never  heats  his  Iron  hot, 

But  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid  must 
blow  the  Bellows. 

O  the  Tanner,  the  Merry,  Merry  Tanner, 

The  Tanner  that  draws  good  Hides  into  Leather  \ 

He  never  strips  himself  to  work, 

But  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid,  but  his  Maid  and  he's 

O  the  Tinker,  the  sturdy,  sturdy  Tinker, 

The  Tinker  that  deals  all  in  Mettle ; 
He  never  clencheth  home  a  Nail, 

But  his  Trull,  but  his  Trull,  but  his  Trull  holds  up 
the  Kettle. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  63 

The  Woman  wears  the  BREECHES. 
Tune,  Three  Children  sliding  on  the  Thames.     Pag.  i. 

A    Pox  upon  this  cursed  Life, 
_/-\_  Where  shall  I  make  my  moan  ? 
For  I  am  troubled  with  a  Wife, 

Like  her  there's  few  or  none. 

Like  unto  her  there  cannot  be 

Another  such  a  one  : 
For  when  the  Priest  did  Marry  me, 

Then  my  good  Days  were  gone. 

Therefore  take  heed  good  Neighbours  all, 

I  wish  you  to  beware, 
For  when  my  Wife  doth  Scold  and  Baul, 

Then  Skimington  is  there. 

This  sawcy  Jack  behind  my  Back, 

And  eke  before  my  Face  : 
Maintains  my  Wife  to  Bait  and  Strife, 
Which  is  a-Woful  Case. 

And  now  I  see  no  Remedy, 

But  I  must  needs  complain 
On  him  you  know,  that  wrought  this  Woe, 

In  England  or  in  Spain. 

One  Skimington  about  doth  run, 

In  City  and  in  Town, 
Come  Man  and  Child  with  Spear  and  Shield, 

And  help  to  beat  him  down. 

And  you  good  Wives,  bring  out  your  Knives, 

And  cut  out  both  his  Stones  ; 
And  two  or  three  then  may  agree, 

To  break  some  of  his  Bones. 
)K  With 

64  SONGS  Compleat, 

With  Rakes  and  Reels,  ond  Oven-Peels, 
With  Mawkin  and  with  Flayl ; 

With  Whips  and  Slings,  and  other  things, 
To  beat  him  Top  and  Tail. 

Then  let  him  run  to  Islington, 

Or  else  into  the  Vyes, 
Where  two  or  three  they  may  agree 

To  pick  out  both  his  Eyes. 

Then  let  him  fly  to  Coventry ', 

Or  else  to  London-stone, 
And  like  a  wretch  in  Middlesex, 

There  let  him  make  his  Moan. 

All  Marry'd  Men  that  see  him  then, 
Will  shake  their  Heads,  and  say, 

He  shall  have  neither  Meat  nor  Drink, 
But  let  him  march  away. 

Then  all  the  Bells  in  London  Town 
Shall  ring  both  fine  and  brave, 

When  they  have  bury'd  Skimington, 
And  laid  him  in  his  Grave. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


Jj?««y  long  resisted 
Wully's  fierce  desire  ; 
She  the  more  persisted, 

Coyness  rais'd  his  Fire. 
When  he'd  reap'd  the  Treasure, 

And  the  Virgin's  Spoils, 
He  found  such  short  Pleasure, 
Answer'd  not  his  Toils. 

jfenny  lay  neglected 

In  her  Lover's  Arms, 
"When  she  was  rejected, 

She  try'd  all  her  Charms  : 
Then  she  did  discover, 

That  no  Trick,  nor  Art, 
Tho't  might  win  a  Lover, 

Cou'd  regain  his  Heart. 

VOL.  IV. 


66  SONGS  Compleat, 

KATY'S  Beauty.     On  Madam  K.  W. 

TV"  Attfs  a  Beauty  surpassing, 
J\^  She's  a  Sweet  Garden  to  pass  in, 
In  Town  there  is  not  like  a  Lass  in, 
So  Sweet,  so  Charming  is  she. 

Her  Eyes  like  Stars  do  so  twinkle, 
Her  Face  is  smooth,  without  wrinkle, 
Her  Chin's  adorn'd  with  a  Dimple, 
Like  the  Charms  above  her  Knee. 

Her  Lips  as  Red  as  a  Rose  is, 
And  round  and  pretty  her  Nose  is  ; 
Her  Breath's  a  sweet  mixture  of  Posies ; 
None  on  Earth's  compar'd  to  she. 

Her  Belly's  a  Hill  of  Sweet  Pleasure, 
In  Bush  enclos'd  lies  the  Treasure, 
If  you  once  make  but  a  Seasure, 
Your  lost  in  an  Extasie. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

The  QUEEN  of  MAY. 

UPon  a  time  I  chanced  to  walk  along  a  Green, 
Where  pretty  Lasses  danced  in  strife  to  chuse  a 
Queen  ; 
Some  homely  drest,  some  handsom,  some  pretty,  and 

some  gay, 

But  who  excell'd  in  Dancing,  must  be  the  Queen  of 

From  Morning  till  the  Evening,  their   Controversy 

And  I,  as  Judge,  stood  gazing  on,  to  Crown  her  that 

excell'd  ; 
At  last  when  Ph<zbus  Steeds  had  drawn  their  Wayn 

We  found  and  crown'd  a  Damsel  to  be  the  Queen  of 


F  2  Full 

68  SONGS  Compleat, 

Full  well  her  Nature  from  her  Face  I  did  admire, 
Her  Habit  well  become  her,  altho'  in  poor  Attire ; 
Her  Carriage  was  so  good,  as  did  appear  that  Day, 
That  she  was  justly  chosen  to  be  the  Queen  of  May.  , 

Then  all  the  rest  in  Sorrow,  and  she  in  sweet  Content, 
Gave  over  till  the  Morrow,  and  homewards  strait  they. 


But  she  of  all  the  rest,  was  hindred  by  the  way, 
For  ev'ry  Youth  that  met  her,  must  Kiss  the  Queen  of 


At  last  I  caught  and  stay'd  her  a  while  with  me  alone,' 
And  on  a  Bank  I  laid  her,  when  all  the  rest  were 


She  fearing  some  Mischance,  cry'd  out,  forbear  I  pray, 
Yet  I   could  still  do  nothing  but  Kiss  the  Queen  of 


Thus  we  together  tumbled  at  least  an  hour  or  more, 
And  like  a  Fool,  I  Fumbled,  as  I  had  done  before : 
But  when  that  Night  was  come,  by  chance  I  got  the  day, 
And  yet  a  lass,  did  nothing  else  but  Kiss  the  Queen; 

of  May. 
Her  thoughts  of  coming  thither,  both  Grief  and  Joy 

begot,  [what, 

She  smil'd  and  wept  together,  yet  knew  not  well  for 
And  still  desir'd  to  go,  but  yet  she  seem'd  to  stay,       : 
Yet  I  alas,  &c. 

She  sigh'd  and  pray'd  for  pity  that  I  would  once  give 

o'er  [for  more  : 

Yet  were  her  Words  so  Wity,  they  shew'd  she  wish'd 
Then  seeming  to  defend  it,  her  Fort  she  did  betray ; 

Yet  I  alas,  &°<r. 

Thus  shaking  Hands  at  last  we  part,  but  she  appear'd 
Both  heavy  Ey'd  and  Hearted,  with  that  she  felt  and 

fear'd  ; 
Then  turning  round  we   parted,  she  speechless  went 

her  way, 

Because  I  could  do  nothing  but  Kiss  the  Queen  of  May. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 

The  True  WORLD. 


say  the  World  is  full  of  Pelf, 
^     But  I  think  there's  no  Chink, 

For  I  have  little  my  self ; 

When  Pockets  are  full,  then  Gentlemen  borrow, 
And  one  ought  not  to  trust, 
To  be  paid  as  to  Morrow. 


70  SONGS  Compleat, 


Then  let  them  seek  the  World  throughout, 
From  the  Usurer,  to  his  best  Friend^ 

Ask  here,  and  ask  there, 

And  the  Devil  a  Penny  they'll  lend. 

Your  honest  Citizens  bends  the  Brow, 
And  complains  there's  no.  Gains, 

For  to  be  got  by  Gentlemen  now ; 
For  when  he  does  his  Book  survey, 

He  doth  find  more  left  behind, 
Then  swears  they'll  never  pay. 
Then  let  them,  &c. 

When  Gentlemen  to  th'  Scrivners  come, 
They  will  crave  their  Name  to  have, 

And  the  next  day  will  give  them  their  Doom ; 
Mean  time  the  Usurer  Plots  his  Head, 

About  the  'state  left  of  late 

By  the  Father  who  is  yet  scarce  Dead, 
Then  let  them,  &c. 

If  you  your  Gamester  will  accost, 

He'll  prevent  your  Intent, 
With  G —  D —  him  his  Money's  lost, 

Your  Courtier  he  can  Kiss  your  Hand, 
Cog  and  Lie,  and  deny, 

And  swear  if  he  had  it,  you  shall  it  command. 

Then  let  them  seek  the  World  throughout \ 
From  the  Usurer,  to  his  best  Friend, 

Ask  here,  and  ask  there, 

And  the  Devil  a  Penny  they'll  lend. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



1  njn ~       — U± — L 

C  HO. 

MY  pretty  Maid,  fain  would  I  know 
What  thing  it  is  will  breed  Delight, 
That  strives  to  stand,  yet  cannot  go, 
That  feeds  the  Mouth  that  cannot  bite. 

With  a   Humbledum,    Grumbledum,   humbledunt 

grumbledum  hey. 

With  a  Humbledum,    Grumbledum,   humbledum 
grumbledum  hey. 


J2  SONGS  Compleat, 

It  is  a  pretty  pricking  thing, 
A  pleasing  and  a  standing  thing, 
'Twas  the  Truncheon  Mars  did  use, 
A  Bed-ward  bit  which  Maidens  chuse. 
With  a  Jfumbledum,  &c. 

It  is  a  Shaft  of  Cupid's  cut, 
'Twill  serve  to  Rove,  to  Prick,  to  Butt ; 
There's  never  a  Maid,  but  by  her  will 
Will  keep  it  in  her  Quiver  still. 
With  a  Humbledum,  &c. 

'Tis  a  Fryer  with  a  Bald-Head, 
A  Staff  to  beat  a  Cuckold  Dead  ; 
It  is  a  Gun  that  shoots  point-blank  ; 
It  hits  betwixt  a  Woman's  Flank, 
With  a  Humbledum,  &c. 

It  has  a  Head  much  like  a  Mole's, 
And  yet  it  loves  to  creep  in  Holes  : 
The  fairest  She  that  e'er  took  Life, 
For  love  of  this,  became  a  Wife. 


With  a  Humbledum,    Grumbledum,   humbledum 

grnmbledum  hey. 
With  a  Humbledumy   Grumbledum,   humbledum, 

grumbledum  hey. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 




Y  Mistress  is  a  Hive  of  Bees  in  yonder  flowry 

ro"  her  they  come  with  loaden  Thighs,  to  ease  them 

of  their  Burden  : 
As  under  the  Bee-Hive  lieth  the  Wax,  and  under  the 

Wax  is  Honey. 

So  under  her  Waste  her  Belly  is  plac'd,  and  under  that 
her  C — ny. 


74  SONGS  Compleat, 

My  Mistress  is  a  Mine  of  Gold,  would  that  it  were  her 

To  let  me  dig  within  her  Mould,  and  roll  among  her 

As  under  the  Moss  the  Mould  doth  lye,  and  under  the 

Mould  is  Mony, 
So  under,  &c. 

My  Mistress  in  a  Morn  si  May,  which  drops  of  Dew 

down  stilleth, 
Where  e'er  she  goes  to  sport  and  play,  the  Dew  down 

sweetly  trilleth, 
As  under  the  Sun  the  Mist  doth  lye,  so  under  the  Mist 

it  is  Sunny, 
So  under,  &c. 

My  Mistress  is  a  pleasant  Spring,  that  yieldeth  store  of 

Water  sweet, 
That  doth  refresh  each  wither'd  thing  lies  trodden  under 

Her  Belly  is  both  white  and  soft,  and  downy  as  any 

That  many  Gallants  wish  full  oft  to  play  but  with  her 

C— ny. 

My  Mistress  hath  the  Magick  Sprays,  of  late  she  takes 

such  wondrous  pain, 
That  she  can  pleasing  Spirits  raise,  and  also  lay  them 

down  again, 
Such  power  hath  my  tripping  Doe,  my  little  pretty 

That  many  would  their  Lives  forego,  to  play  but  with 

her  C — ny. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


The  forgetful  MOTHER. 

MY  Mother  she  will  not  endure 
That  I  should  Married  be, 
Altho'  my  Father  do  procure 

A  Husband  fit  for  me  ; 
Wherein  she  doth  me  much  abuse, 
My  Father's  profer  to  refuse  ; 
For  younger  Maids  than  I  are  sped, 
And  yet  forsooth,  I  must  not  Wed. 


76  SONGS  Compleat, 

My  Mother  she  breeds  all  the  Jars, 

And  ill  she  does  me  use, 
And  Love  and  Age  breeds  all  the  Wars, 
Which  grieves  me  to  refuse. 
Before  she  was  as  old  as  I, 
She  with  a  Man  six  Weeks  did  lie  ; 
Judge  you  how  much  she  doth  me  wrong, 
To  make  me  live  a  Maid  so  long. 

For  now  I  am  of  lawful  Years, 

A  Twelve  Month's  time  and  more, 
As  by  the  Church-Book  plain  appears, 
Which  doth  my  Age  implore. 
For  now  I  am  Sixteen  years  old, 
Why  should  I  then  be  thus  controul'd, 
And  discontent  to  lie  alone ; 
None  knows  my  Grief,  but  by  their  own. 

I  do  believe  in  Heart  and  Mind, 

There  is  no  greater  Pain 
Can  fall  upon  us  Woman-kind, 
And  breedeth  all  our  Pain, 
To  lie  alone,  all  by  my  self, 
It  breeds  Disease,  instead  of  Health ; 
And  shortly  it  will  end  my  Days, 
For  so  I  know  the  Doctor  says. 

My  Father's  Care  I  must  commend, 

And  Pains  that  he  doth  take  ; 
My  Mother  speaks  not  as  a  Friend, 
That  I  shan't  have  a  Mate. 
Altho'  my  Mother  doth  refuse 
That  I  my  youthful  time  should  use, 
I  me^ii  not  long  to  stay  un-wed, 
Nor  yet  to  keep  my  Maiden-head. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  77 


NOT  long  ago  as  all  alone  I  lay  upon  my  Bed, 
'Twixt  sleeping  and  waking,  this  Maggot  came 

in  my  Head, 
Which  caus'd  me  in  the  Mind  to  be,  the  meaning  for 

to  know, 

With  Skill  and  Wit,  and  then  I  writ  of  Cuckolds  all 

Methoughts  I  heard  a  Man  and's  Wife,  as  they  to 
gether  lay. 

Being  quite  void  of  strife,  she  thus  to  him  did  say, 

Quoth  she,  Sweet-heart,  if  thou  wilt  Sport,  my  Love,  to 
thee  I'll  show 

A  pretty  thing  shall  make  thee  sing  of  Cuckolds  all  a- 

Peace  Wife,  quoth  he  to  her  again,  I'm  sure  thou 

dost  but  Jest, 

Altho'  I  am  Cornuted  plain,  I  am  no  common  Beast ; 
Yet  ev'ry  Woman's  like  to  thee,  for  ought  that  I  do 

And  each  Man  may  be  like  to  me,  Cuckolds  all  a-row. 

There's   neither   Lord,   nor   Gentleman,    Citizen,   or 


That  liveth  in  the  City,  or  the  Country  Town, 
But  may  carry  Horns  about  them,  tho'  they  them  never 

For  Gallants  are  like  other  Men,  Cuckolds  all  a-row. 


7&  ;b  o  N  G  s  Lompleat, 

Your  Tradesmen  in  the  City,  that  sells  by  Weight 

and  Measure, 
Perhaps  may  wear  a  horned  Brow,  for  Profit  or  for 

When  they  to  sell  their  Wares  begin,  that  make  so 

great  a  show, 
Their  Wives  may  play  at  In  and  In,  Cuckolds  all  a- 


Your  Country  prating  Lawyers  that  gets  the  Devil  and 


That  Pleads  every  Term  in  Westminster  Hall, 
His  Wife  in  the  Country,  for  ought  that  he  does  know, 
May  let  his  Client  have  a  Fee,  Cuckolds  all  a-row. 

The  Parson  of  the  Parish  I  hope  shall  not  go  free, 
While  he  is  in  his  Study,  another  may  be 
A  dandling  of  his  Wife,  and  do  the  thing  you  know, 
And  make  him  wear  his  Corner'd  Cap,  Cuckolds  all  a- 

If  any  one  offended  be,  and  think  I  do  him  wrong, 
For  naming  of  a  Cuckold,  in  this  my  merry  Song, 
Let  him  subscribe  his  Name,  and  eke  his  Dwelling 

And  he  and  I  will  soon  agree,  like  Cuckolds  all  a-row. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive, 


BACCHUS  against  CUPID. 

PRithee  Friend  leave  off  thy  Thinking, 
Cast  thy  Cares  and  Love  away ; 
Troubles  still  are  drown'd  in  Drinking, 

Do  not,  do  not  then  delay ; 
Bacchus  cares  not  for  thy  Will, 
But  will  have  us  Drinking  still. 

Do  but  view  this  Glass  of  Claret, 

How  invitingly  it  looks  ; 
Drink  it  quickly,  or  you'll  marr  it, 

Pox.  of  Fighting,  or  of  Books  : 
Let  us  have  good  store  of  Wine, 
Hang  him  then  that  does  repine. 

Call  the  Drawer,  bid  him  fill  it, 

As  full  as  ever  it  can  hold  : 
O  take  heed  you  do  not  spill  it, 

'Tis  more  precious  far  than  Gold  ; 
Let  us  Drink,  and  then  'twill  prove, 
Drinking's  better  Sport  than  Love. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

JOAN  to  her  LADY. 

LAdy,  sweet  now  do  not  frown, 
.   Nor  in  Anger  call  me  Clown, 
For  your  servant  Joan  may  prove, 
Like  your  self,  as  deep  in  Love ; 
And  as  absolute  a  Bit, 
Man's  sweet  liquorish  Tooth  to  fit. 
The  Smock  alone  the  difference  makes, 
5 }  Cause  yours  is  spun  of  finer  Flax.    ' 

What  avails  the  Name  of  Madam  ? 
Came  not  all  from  Father  Adam  ? 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  8  r 

Where  does  one  exceed  the  other  ? 
Was  not  Eve  our  common  Mother  ? 
Then  what  odds  'twixt  you  and  Joan  ? 
Truly  in  my  Judgment,  none. 
The  Smock,  &c. 

Ladies  are  but  Blood  and  Bone, 
Skin  and  Sinews,  so  is  Joan, 
Joaris  a  Piece  for  a  Man  to  bore, 
With  his  Wimble,  your's  no  more. 
Then  what  odds,  £c. 

It  is  not  your  flaunting  Tires, 
Are  the  cause  of  Men's  Desires  ; 
They're  other  Darts  which  Lusts  pursue, 
Those  Joan  has  as  well  as  you. 
Then,  £c. 

What  care  we  for  Glorious  Lights, 
Women  are  used  in  the  Nights  ; 
And  in  Night  in  Women-kind, 
Kings  and  Clowns  like  Sport  do  find. 
Then,  &c. 

Were  there  two  in  Bed  together, 
There's  not  a  Pin  to  chuse  'twixt  either; 
Both  have  Eyes,  and  both  have  Lips ; 
Both  have  Thighs  and  both  have  Hips. 
Then,  &c. 

When  your  Hand  puts  out  the  Candle, 
And  you  at  last  begin  to  handle, 
Then  you  go  about  to  do 
What  you  should  be  done  unto. 
Then,  &c. 

Who  can  but  in  Conscience  say, 
Fie,  fie,  for  shame  away,  away, 
Putting  Finger  in  the  Eye, 
Till  you  have  a  fresh  Supply. 

Then,  &c. 
VOL.  iv.  G  CONSENT 


SONGS  Compleat, 

CON  SENT  at  last. 


T     Adys,  why  doth  Love  torment  you  ? 

J ,.  Cannot  I  your  Griefs  remove  ? 

Is  there  none  that  can  content  you 
With  the  sweet  delights  of  Love  ? 
O  No,  no,  no,  no,  no ;  0  No,  no,  no,  no,  no,  no,  no* 

Beauty  in  a  perfect  Measure, 

Hath  the  Love  and  wish  of  all : 
Dear,  than  shall  I  wait  the  Pleasure, 
That  commands  my  Heart  and  all : 
0  No,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  83 

If  I  grieve,  and  you  can  ease  me, 

Will  you  be  so  fiercely  bent, 
Having  wherewithal  to  please  me, 

Must  I  still  be  Discontent  ? 
O  No,  &c. 

If  I  am  your  faithful  Servant, 

And  my  Love  does  still  remain ; 
Will  you  think  it  ill  deserved, 

To  be  favour'd  for  my  pain  ? 
O  No,  &c. 

If  I  should  then  but  crave  a  Favour, 

Which  your  Lips  invite  me  to, 
Will  you  think  it  ill  Behaviour 

Thus  to  steal  a  Kiss  or  two  ? 
O  No,  &c. 

All  Amazing  Beauty's  Wonder, 

May  I  presume  your  Breast  to  touch  ? 
Or  to  feel  a  little  under, 

Will  you  think  I  do  too  much  ? 
O  No,  &c. 

Once  more  fairest,  let  me  try  ye, 

Now  my  wish  is  fully  sped, 
If  all  Night,  I  would  lye  by  ye, 

Shall  I  be  refus'd  your  Bed. 

O  No,  no,  no,  no,  no :  O  No,  no,  no,  no,  no,  no,  no. 

G  2  The 

#4  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Glory  of  all  CUCKOLDS. 

-&-      -&-. 

T     Isten  Lordlings  to  my  Story, 
I    _,  I  will  sing  of  Cuckolds  Glory  ; 
And  thereat  let  none  be  vext, 
None  can  tell  whose  turn  is  next : 
And  tho'  it  now  is  held  in  scorn, 
I'll  Sing  the  praise  of  noble  HORN. 

Diana  was  a  Virgin  pure, 

Among  the  rest  Chaste  and  Demure ; 

But  you  know  well  that  I  am  sure, 

What  Acteon  did  endure  : 

If  Men  have  HORNS  from  such  as  she, 

I  pray  then  let  us  all  agree, 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

Let  thy  Friend  enjoy  his  Rest, 
What  tho'  he  wears  Acteoris  Crest ; 
Malice  nor  Venome  at  him  spit, 
He  wears  but  what  the  Gods  think  fit : 
Confess  he  is  by  Time's  Recorder, 
Knight  of  great  Diana's  Order. 

Luna  was  no  Venial  Sinner, 

Yet  she  hath  a  Man  within  her ; 

And  to  cut  off  Cuckolds  Scorns, 

She  decks  his  Head  with  Silver  HORNS 

And  if  the  Man  in  Heaven's  thus  D  rest, 

We  Men  on  Earth  like  him  are  Blest 

A  True  SATYR. 
'Set  by  Mr.  AKEROYDE. 

86  S  CXN  G  s  Compleat, 

LONG  have  I  grieved  for  to  see 
Of  all  Estates  in  each  Degree  ; 
I  have  Laugh'd,  I  have  Quaft  and  have  Wept, 
And  a  stir  like  a  Cur  have  I  kept : 
But  now  here  I  stand  with  a  Whip  in  my  Hand, 

Come  along,  come  along,  come  along,  come  along,  I  must 
lash  you, 

Come  you  Divines  that  should  be  Pure, 

That  keep  a  Man  to  serve  the  Cure  ; 

You  do  Teach  not  to  Preach,  but  to  show 

Places  fine,  Such  Divines  as  you  are  slow : 

Your  Benefits  you'll  keep,  whilst  another  feeds  the 

Comealotig,  &c. 

Come  you  that  live  so  by  the  Law, 
That  keep  your  Neighbours  so  in  Awe ; 
If  a  Hog  or  a  Beast  you  espy 
In  the  Ground,  to  the  Pound  they  must  hie  : 
Whole  Towns  you  will  bruit  with  a  Pettifogging  Suit, 
Come  along,  &c. 

Come  you  that  brag  so  of  your  Wealth, 
Because  you  have  a  little  Pelf; 
'Tis  your  Gold  makes  you  so  bold  to  do  wrong, 
Men  are  the  worse  that  your  Purse  is  so  strong  : 
To  build  houses  high  to  the  Peoples  Misery, 
Come  along,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  87 

But  what's  become  of  the  Estate, 

The  which  your  Father  left  of  late  ; 

You  have  no  care  for  to  spare,  but  to  spend, 

Till  you  bring  ev'ry  thing  to  an  end : 

You'll  Drink  away  your  Health,  and  Dice  away  your 

Come  along,  &c. 

Come  you  Quack-salvers  that  do  kill 

Sometimes  a  Patient  by  your  Skill ; 

You  will  urge  them  to  Purge  and  let  Blood, 

You  will  tell  that  it  will  do  them  good  : 

You  will  ease  them  of  their  Purse,  tho'  their  Bodies 

be  the  worse, 
Come  along,  &c. 

Come  you  Ladies  that  do  wear 

More  Fashions  than  Sundays  in  the  Year ; 

With  your  Locks,  Ribbond  Knots,  and  silk  Roses ; 

With  your  Spots  on  your  Face  and  your  Noses  : 

Your  bear  Breasts  and  your  Back,  discover  what  you 

Come  along,  &c. 

Come  you  Tradesmen  of  the  City, 

That  are  so  Cunning  and  so  Witty ; 

I  would  know  how  you  grow  Rich  so  fast, 

You  will  swear  you  sell  your  Ware  for  less  than't  cost : 

Or  else  you'll  give  the  buying,  but  I'll  not  believe  the 

Come  along,  &c. 

Come  along  you  Puritan, 

That  make  your  self  a  Holy  Man  ; 

Tho'  you  lift  up  your  Eyes  when  you  Pray, 

And  frequent  Four  Sermons  in  a  Day  : 

Under  pretence  of  pure  Life,  and  yet  will  Kiss  your 

Neighbour's  Wife, 
Come  along,  &c. 


88  SONGS  Compleat, 

But  now  I  am  so  weary  grown, 
That  I  must  let  the  rest  alone; 
I  should  slash  more  with  my  Lash,  did  I  dare, 
Many  more,  now  therefore  them  I  spare  : 
The  rest  I  leave  to  the  Judges  and  the  Sheriffs, 
And  they  shall  lash  you. 


I ^-1 — ^d — I-  ^ 

MY  Mind  to  me  a  Kingdom  is, 
Such  perfect  Joys  therein  I  find ; 
That  it  excels  all  other  Bliss, 

The  World  affords  or  grows  by  Kind  : 
Tho'  much  I  want  that  most  would  have, 
Yet  still  my  Mind  forbids  to  crave. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  89 

No  Princely  Pomp,  no  Wealthy  store, 

No  force  to  win  the  Victory  ; 
No  cunning  Wit  to  salve  a  Sore, 

No  shape  to  feed  a  loving  Eye : 
To  none  of  these  am  I  in  Thrall, 
For  why,  my  Mind  to  me  is  all. 

Content  I  live  with  this  my  stay, 
I  wish  no  more  than  may  suffice  ; 

I  press  to  bear  no  mighty  Sway, 

Look  what  I  want,  my  Mind  supplies  : 

Thus  do  I  Triumph  like  a  King, 

Content  with  that  my  Mind  doth  bring. 

Some  have  too  much,  and  yet  do  want, 

I  little  have,  but  wish  no  more  ; 
They  are  but  Poor,  for  much  they  want, 

And  I  am  Rich,  with  little  store  : 
They  Poor,  I  Rich,  they  Beg,  I  give, 
They  lack,  I  leave,  they  Pine,  I  live. 

Some  weigh  their  Pleasure  by  their  Lust, 
Their  Wisdom  by  the  rage  of  Will ; 

Their  Treasure  is  their  only  Trust, 

And  crooked  Craft  their  School  of  Skill : 

But  all  the  Pleasure  I  can  find, 

Is  the  Content  of  a  quiet  Mind. 

My  Health  is  Wealth  and  perfect  Ease, 
A  Conscience  clean,  my  chief  defence  ; 

I  do  not  seek  by  Bribes  to  please, 
Nor  by  Deceit  to  give  Offence  : 

Thus  do  I  live,  thus  will  I  die, 

Wou'd  all  did  as  well  as  I. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Bashful  SCOT. 



zztn}_j,_A~  —i—C- — ftj- 

—  9— 5— F F— I— / — h — • 

T  <7C^5y  kte  with  y«wy  Walking, 
J    On  a  Day  in  Summer  Season  ; 
Like  a  Lout  with  his  Love  sat  talking, 
When  he  should  be  doing  Reason  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  9 1 

Jockey  lost,  Jockey  lost, 
His  time  to  Dally,  his  time  to  Dally, 
Whilst  he  cry'd,  Sweet,  sweet,  sweet, 
Sweet  Jenny,  shall  I?  shall  I? 

Jenny,  as  must  Woman  use, 

To  deny  when  they  would  have  it, 
With  faint  Tongue  she  did  refuse, 

When  her  Looks  did  seem  to  crave  it : 

Still  he  cry'd,  still  he  cry'd, 
When  he  shou'd  dally,  when  he  shou'd  dally, 
Jenny  sweet,  sweet,  sweet,  sweet, 
Sweet  Jenny,  shall  I?  shall  I? 

She  that  now  was  grown  more  willing, 
When  she  saw  his  backward  dealing, 
To  prevent  her  own  Heart's  illing, 
With  a  Sigh  her  Love  revealing, 

Said  alass  !  said  alass  ! 

When  he  would  dally ;  when  he  would  dally, 
Now  you  stand  Sweet,  sweet,  sweet, 
Sweet  Jenny,  Shall  I?  Shall  I? 

He  perceiv'd  by  her  Replying, 

That  a  Nay  was  Yea,  in  Wooing, 
And  that  asking  without  trying, 
Was  the  way  to  Love's  Undoing ; 
Now  he  knows,  now  he  knows, 
When  he  should  dally,  when  he  should  dally, 
Not  to  stand  sweet,  sweet,  sweet \ 
Sweet  Jenny  Shall  I?  Shall  f? 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Wanton  TRICK. 

— •=— i—  arr-f — f  -f  ~» — f — H  .— r 


IF  any  one  long  for  a  Musical  Song, 
Altho'  that  his  Hearing  be  thick, 
The  sound  that  it  bears  will  ravish  his  Ears, 
Whoop,  'tis  but  a  Wanton  Trick. 

A  pleasant  young  Maid  on  an  Instrument  play'd, 
That  knew  neither  Note,  nor  Prick  ; 

She  had  a  good  Will  to  live  by  her  Skill, 
Whoop,  &c. 

A  Youth  in  that  Art  well  seen  in  his  Part, 

They  call'd  him  Darbyshire  Dick, 
Came  to  her  a  Suitor,  and  wou'd  be  her  Tutor, 

Whoop,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  93 

To  run  with  his  Bow  he  was  not  slow, 

His  Fingers  were  nimble  and  quick, 
When  he  play'd  on  his  Bass,  he  ravish'd  the  Lass, 

Whoop,  £c. 

He  Woo'd  her  and  Taught  her,  until  he  had  brought 

To  hold  out  a  Crotchet  and  Prick, 
And  by  his  direction,  she  came  to  Perfection, 

Whoop,  &c. 

With  Playing  and  Wooing  he  still  would  be  doing, 
And  call'd  her  his  pretty  sweet  Chick  : 

His  reasonable  Motion  brought  her  to  Devotion, 
Whoop,  &c. 

He  pleas'd  her  so  well,  that  backwards  she  fell, 

And  swooned,  as  tho'  she  were  sick  ; 
So  sweet  was  his  Note,  that  up  went  her  Coat, 

Whoop,  &c. 

The  string  of  his  Viol  she  put  to  the  Trial, 
Till  she  had  the  full  length  of  the  Stick  ? 

Her  white  Belly'd  Lute  she  set  to  his  Flute, 
Whoop,  &c. 

Thus  she  with  her  Lute,  and  he  with  his  Flute, 

Held  every  Crotchet  and  Prick  ; 
She  learned  at  leisure,  yet  paid  for  the  Pleasure, 

Whoop,  &c. 

His  Viol-string  burst,  her  Tuten  she  Curst, 

However  she  play'd  with  the  Stick, 
From  October  to  yune.3h&.  was  quite  out  of  Tune, 

Whoop,  &c. 

With  sheming  her  Hand  to  make  the  Pin  stand, 

The  Musick  within  her  grew  Thick, 
Of  his  Vial  and  Ltite  appeared  some  Fruit, 

Whoop,  &c. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

And  then  she  repented,  that  e'er  she  consented, 

To  have  either  Note  or  Prick  ; 
For  Learning  so  well  made  her  Belly  to  swell, 

Whoop,  &c. 

All  Maids  that  make  trial  of  a  Lute  or  a  Vial, 
Take  heed  how  you  handle  the  Stick  : 

If  you  like  not  this  Order,  come  try  my  Recorder ', 
Whoop,  &c. 

And  if  that  this  Ditty  forsooth  doth  not  fit  ye, 
I  know  not  what  Musick  to  Prick, 

There's  never  a  Strain  but  in  time  will  be  twain, 
Whoop,  'tis  but  a  Wanton  Trick. 

The  Silly  MAIDS. 

H-y— • CR    — *- I — -— i- 


Pkasanl  and  Diver  five.  95 

MAids  are  grown  so  Coy  of  late, 
Forsooth  they  will  not  Marry ; 
hey're  in  their  Teens  and  past, 
They  say  they  yet  can  tarry  : 
But  if  they  knew  how  sweet  a  thing 

It  is  in  Youth  to  Marry, 
They  would  sell  their  Hose  and  Smock, 
E'er  they  so  long  would  tarry. 

Winter  Nights  are  long  you  know, 

And  bitter  cold  the  Weather, 
Then  who's  so  fond  to  lie  alone, 

When  two  may  lie  together  ? 
And  is't  not  brave  when  Summer  comes, 

With  all  the  Fields  inrolled, 
To  take  a  Green-Gown  on  the  Grass, 

And  wear  it  uncontrouled  ? 

For  she  that  is  most  Coy  of  all, 

If  she  had  time  and  leisure, 
Would  lay  away  severest  Thoughts, 

And  turn  to  Mirth  and  Pleasure : 
For  why,  the  fairest  Maid  sometimes 

Puts  on  the  Face  of  Folly, 
And  Maids  do  ne'er  repent  so  much 

As  when  they  are  too  Holy, 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  North-Country  Mans  SONG,  on  the 
View  of  London  Sights. 

Set  by  Mr.  AKEROYDE. 


WHen  Ize  came  first  to  London  Town, 
Ize  war  a  Noviz,  as  many  mo  Men  are; 
Ize  thought  the  King  had  liv'd  at  the  Crown, 

And  all  the  way  to  Heaven  had  been  thro'  the  Star. 

Ize  zet  up  my  Horse,  and  Ize  went  to  Fowls, 
Uds  nigs,  quoth  I,  what  a  Kirk  beth'  here, 

Then  Ize  did  swear  by  all  Kurson  Souls, 
It  was  a  Mile  long,  or  very  near. 

The  top  wor  as  high  as  any  Hill ; 

A  Hill,  quoth  I,  nay  as  a  Mountain, 
But  Ize  went  up  with  very  good  Will, 

But  gladder  was  I  to  come  down  again. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  9  7 

For  as  I  went  up,  my  Head  ga  round, 
Then  be  it  known  to  all  Kurson  People ; 

A  Man  is  no  little  way  fro  the  Ground, 
When  he's  o'th'  top  of  Paul's  Steeple. 

Ize  lay  down  my  Hat,  and  Ize  went  to  Pray, 

But  wor  not  this  a  pitiful  Case  ? 
A'vor  Ize  had  done,  it  wor  stolen  away, 

Who'd  a  thought  Thieves  had  been  in  that  place. 

Now  vor  my  Hat  Ize  made  great  moan, 

A  stander  by  then  to  me  said, 
Thou  dost  not  observe  the  Scripture  aright, 

For  thou  mun  a  watch'd  as  well  as  pray'd. 

From  thence  to  Westminster  Ize  went, 
Where  many  a  brave  Lawyer  Ize  did  see  ; 

But  zome  there  had  a  bad  intent, 

I'm  zure  my  Purse  was  stolen  from  me. 

Now  to  zee  the  Tombs  was  my  desire, 
Ize  went  with  many  brave  Fellows  store ; 

Ize  gan  them  a  Penny,  that  was  their  Hire, 
And  he's  "but  a  Fool  that  will  give  any  more. 

Then  through  the  Rooms  the  Fellow  me  led, 
Where  all  the  Zights  were  to  be  zeen  ; 

And  snuffling  told  me  through  the  Nose, 

What  formerly  the  Names  of  those  had  been. 

Here  lies,  quoth  he,  Henry  the  Third, 
Thou  ly'st  like  a  Knave,  he  says  never  «,  Word  ; 

And  here  lies  Richard  the  Second  Interr'd, 
And  here  stands  good  King  Edward's  Sword. 

And  under  this  Chair  lies  Jacob's  Stone, 
The  very  same  Stone  is  now  in  the  Chair ; 

A  very  good  Jest ;  had  Jacob  but  One  ? 
How  got  he  so  many  Sons  without  a  pair  ? 

VOL.  iv.  H  Ize 

98  SONGS  Compleat, 

Ize  staid  not  there,  but  down  with  the  Tide, 
Ize  made  great  hast,  and  Ize  went  my  way  ; 

For  Ize  was  to  zee  the  Lyons  beside, 
And  the  Paris-Garden  all  in  a  Day. 

When  Ize  came  there,  Ize  was  in  a  Rage, 
Ize  rail'd  on  him  that  kept  the  Bears  ; 

Instead  of  a  Stake,  was  suffer'd  a  Stage, 
And  in  Hunks  his  House  a  Crew  of  Players. 

Then  through  the  Bridge  to  the  Tower  Ize  went, 

With  much  ado  Ize  entered  in  : 
And  after  a  Penny  that  I  had  spent, 

One  with  a  loud  Voice  did  thus  begin. 

This  Lyon's  the  King's,  and  that's  the  Queen's 
And  this  is  the  Princes  that  stands  hereby  : 

With  that  I  went  near  to  look  in  the  Den, 
Cods  body  !  quoth  he,  why  come  you  so  nigh. 

Ize  made  great  haste  unto  my  Inn, 

Ize  Zupt,  and  Ize  went  to  Bed  betimes  ; 

Ize  Slept,  and  Ize  Dream'd  what  I  had  Zeen, 
And  wak'd  again  by  Cheap-side  Chimes. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 


A  BALLAD  of  the  Courtier  and  the  Country 

* — 

YOUR  Courtiers  scorn  we  Country  Clowns, 
We  Country  Clowns  care  not  for  Court ; 
But  we'll  be  as  merry  upon  the  Downs, 

As  you  are  at  Midnight  with  all  your  Sport. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

You  Hawk,  you  Hunt,  you  lie  upon  Pallets, 

You  Eat,  you  Drink,  the  Lord  knows  how ; 
We  sit  upon  Hillocks,  and  pick  up  our  Sallets, 
And  drink  up  a  Sillibub  under  a  Cow. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 
H  2 

TOO  SONGS  Compleat, 

Your  Masques  are  made  for  Knights  and  Lords, 

And  Ladies  that  go  fine  and  gay ; 
We  Dance  to  such  Musick  the  Bag-pipe  affords, 

And  trick  up  our  Lasses  as  well  as  we  may, 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

Your  Cloaths  are  made  of  Silk  and  Sattin, 
And  ours  are  made  of  good  Sheeps  Grey ; 

You  mix  your  Discourses  with  pieces  of  Latin, 
We  speak  our  English  as  well  as  we  may. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

Your  Chambers  are  hung  with  Cloth  of  Arras, 
Our  Meadows  bedeck'd  as  fine  as  may  be  ; 

And  from  our  Sport  you  never  shall  bar  us, 

Since  Joan  in  the  Dark,  is  as  good  as  my  Lady. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

Your  Courtiers  clip  and  cull  upon  Beds, 
We  Jumble  our  Lasses  upon  the  Grass  ; 

And  when  we  have  gotten  their  Maiden-heads, 
They  serve  to  make  a  Courtier's  Lass. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

You  Dance  Courants  and  the  French  Braul, 

We  Jig  the  Morris  upon  the  Green ; 
And  we  make  as  good  sport  in  a  Country-Hall, 

As  you  do  before  the  King  and  the  Queen. 

With  a  Padding,  &c. 

Then  Ladies  do  not  us  disdain, 

Although  we  wear  no  gaudy  Cloaths  ; 
You'll  find  as  much  Pith  in  a  Country  Swain, 

When  he  plucks  up  your  gay  Embroider'd  Cloaths. 

With  a  Padding^  &c. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


A  BALLAD  catfd  COOK-LORREL.     The 
Words  by  BEN.  JOHNSON. 

COok-Lorrel  would  needs  have  the  Devil  his  Guest, 
And  bid  him  once  into  the  Peak  to  Dinner  ; 
Where  never  the  Fiend  had  such  a  Feast, 
Provided  him  yet  at  the  charge  of  a  Sinner. 

His  Stomach  was  queasie,  (for  coming  there  Coach'd) 
The  jogging  had  caus'd  some  Crudities  rise  ; 

To  help  it  he  call'd  for  a  Puritan  poach'd, 
That  used  to  turn  up  the  Eggs  of  his  Eyes. 

And  so  recovered  unto  his  Wish, 

He  sat  him  down,  and  he  fell  to  Eat; 
Promoter  in  Plumb-broth  was  the  first  Dish, 

His  own  privy  Kitchin  had  no  such  Meat. 

Yet  tho'  with  this  he  much  were  taken, 
Upon  a  sudden  he  shifted  his  Trencher, 

As  soon  as  he  spied  the  Bawd  and  Bacon, 
By  this  you  may  note  the  Devil's  a  Wencher. 


IO2  SONGS  Compleaty 

Six  pickled  Taylors  sliced  and  cut, 

Sempsters,  Tire-women,  fit  for  his  Pallet ; 

With  Feather-Men  and  Perfumes  put, 

Some  Twelve  in  a  Charger  to  make  a  grand  Sallet 

A  Rich  fat  Usurer  stewed  in  his  Marrow, 

And  by  him  a  Lawyers  Head  and  Green-sawce , 

Both  which  his  Belly  took  in  like  a  Barrow, 
As  if  till  then  he  had  never  seen  Sawce. 

Then  Carbonado'd  and  Cook'd  with  pains, 
Was  brought  up  a  Cloven  Serjeant's  Face ; 

The  Sawce  was  made  of  the  Yeoman's  Brains, 
That  has  been  beaten  out  with  his  own  Mace. 

Two  roasted  Sheriffs  came  whole  to  the  Board, 
(The  Feast  had  nothing  been  without  'em) 

Both  living  and  dead  they  were  Fox'd  and  Furr'd, 
Their  Chains  like  Sausages  hung  about  'em. 

The  very  next  Dish  was  the  Mayor  of  a  Town, 

With  a  Pudding  of  Maintenance  thrust  in  his  Belly  ; 

Like  a  Goose  in  the  Feathers  drest  in  his  Gown, 
And  his  couple  of  Hindi-Boys  boil'd  to  a  Jelly. 

A  London  Cuckold  hot  from  the  spit, 

And  when  the  Carver  up  had  broke  him ; 

The  Devil  chopt  up  his  Head  at  a  bit, 

But  the  Horns  were  very  near  like  to  have  choak'd 

The  Chine  of  a  Letcher  too  there  was  roasted, 
With  a  plump  Harlot's  Haunch  and  Garlick ; 

A  Pandor's  Pettitoes  that  had  boasted 

Himself  for  a  Captain,  yet  never  was  Warlike, 

A  large  fat  Pasty  of  a  Midwife  hot, 

And  for  cold  bak'd  Meat  into  the  Story  ; 

A  reverend  Painted  Lady  was  brought, 

And  Coffm'd  in  Crust  till  now  she  was  hoary. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  103 

To  these,  an  overgrown  Justice  of  the  Peace, 

With  a  Clark  like  a  Gizard  thrust  under  each  Arm  ; 

And  Warrants  for  Sippets  laid  in  his  own  Grease, 
Set  over  a  Chaffing-dish  to  be  kept  warm. 

The  Jowl  of  a  Jaylor  served  for  Fish, 

A  Constable  sous'd  with  Vinegar  by ; 
Two  Aldermen-Lobsters  asleep  in  a  Dish, 

A  Deputy-Tart,  a  Church- Warden-Pye. 

All  which  devour'd  he,  then  for  a  close, 

Did  for  a  full  Draught  of  Darby  call ; 
He  heav'd  the  huge  Vessel  up  to  his  Nose, 

And  left  not  till  he  drank  up  all. 

Then  from  the  Table  he  gave  a  start, 

Where  Banquet  and  Wine  were  nothing  scarce  ; 

All  which  he  started  away  with  a  Fart, 

From  whence  it  was  called  the  Devil's  Arse. 

And  there  he  made  such  a  breath  with  the  Wind, 
The  hole  too  standing  open  the  while ; 

That  the  scent  of  the  Vapour  before  and  behind, 
Hath  foully  perfumed  most  part  of  the  Isle. 

And  this  was  Tobacco,  the  Learned  suppose, 
Which  since  in  Country,  Court  and  Town  ; 

In  the  Devil's  Glister-pipe  smoaks  at  the  Nose 
Of  Polecat  and  Madam,  of  Gallant  and  Clown. 

From  which  wicked  Weed,  with  Swine's-flesh  and  Ling, 
Or  any  thing  else  that's  feast  for  the  Fiend ; 

Our  Captain  and  we  cry  God  save  the  King, 
And  send  him  good  Meat  and  Mirth  without  end. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Just  BARGAIN. 


T  Am  a  Lover,  and  'tis  true  ; 

J_    Fair  Daphne  I'm  in  Love  with  you  ; 
Woman  thou  art,  for  ought  I  see, 
Yet  more  assur'd  I  wish  to  be : 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

Such  Trial  then  do  not  refuse, 
As  all  Men  in  their  Bargains  use. 

Men  feel  the  Pullen  when  they  lay, 
If  they  be  plump,  and  so  wou'd  I, 
Men  ride  their  Nags,  and  try  their  Pace, 
The  like  would  I  do  in  this  case. 
Who  will  buy  Land,  e'er  they  do  know, 
What  Fruit  on  it  is  apt  to  grow  ? 

Now  if  any  of  my  Parts,  or  all, 
You  will  then  to  Tryal  call, 
You  shall  both  see,  and  feel,  and  taste. 
Lest  you  repent  your  Bargain  past  : 
Then  Part  with  Part  let  us  Compare, 
There's  no  Deceit  in  open  Ware. 

Your  Legs  and  Feet  are  strait  and  fine, 
And  look  you  here  pray  what  are  mine  ? 
You  have  a  round  and  lusty  Thigh  ; 
And  look  you  here,  pray  what  have  I  ? 
But  yet  that  part  that  all  must  bind, 
O  shew  not,  least  you  strike  me  Blind. 


Old  English  ALE. 

io6  SONGS  Compleat, 

•0-m — =^ 

T  Have  been  East,  and  I  have  been  West, 
J_    I  have  been  far  in  the  Nor -th-  Country  ; 
I  have  drank  Wine  and  Beer  of  the  best, 
And  Liquor  that  Men  call  Ipse. 

I've  been  in  Flanders  and  in  France, 

I've  been  in  Spain  and  Italy  ; 
And  I've  seen  many  a  Man  by  chance, 

Fall  down  to  the  Ground  with  Ipse. 

The  strongest  Wine  in  Flanders  or  Spain, 

Or  yet  in  the  Palgravds  Country, 
'Tis  nothing  like  t'our  English  Ale, 

That  Liquor  of  Life,  called  Ipse. 

The  strongest  Soldier  that  ever  did  fight, 
Or  the  bravest  Commander  of  a  Marshalsea, 

May  be  brought  to  the  Ground,  I  hold  him  a  Groat, 
If  he  swagger  too  long  with  Ipse. 

The  Preacher,  the  Teacher,  the  Priest  and  the  Clark, 

The  Doctor  of  Law  and  Divinity  ; 
May  stumble  and  fall  sometimes  in  the  Dark 

If  their  Caps  be  fudled  with  Ipse. 

It  makes  grave  Counsellors  slumber  and  sleep, 
When  they  should  speak  they  cannot  see, 

They  sit  like  Momes,  for  want  of  Wit, 
When  their  Caps  be  fudled  with  Ipse. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  107 

The  whiffling  Gallants  of  the  Inns  of  Court, 

.  Do  hinder  their  Studies  certainly, 
They're  sometimes  glad  to  pawn  their  Suit, 
For  fudling  their  Caps  with  Ipse. 

The  Papist,  the  Puritan  Protestant  too, 
And  all  other  Religions  whatever  they  be, 

Altho'  in  some  Points  they  cannot  agree, 
Yet  none  of  them  differ  in  Ipse. 

The  Taylor  that  eats  more  Bread  at  a  Meal, 
Than  any  Tradesman  does  at  three, 

A  half-penny  Loaf  will  serve  him  a  Week, 
If  his  Cap  be  fudled  with  Ipse. 

The  Smith  and  the  Shoemaker  is  not  behind, 
They  never  were,  nor  never  will  be, 

If  they  be  Drunk,  'tis  but  their  Kind, 
To  fuddle  their  Caps  with  Ipse. 

If  Tradesmen  they  would  but  forego, 
The  Vices  that  hinder  their  Quality, 

The  Malt-man  may  go  hang  himself, 
And  the  Brewer  with  his  strong  Ipse. 

SON  G  s  Conipleat, 

The  Growth  ofCUCKOLDOM. ' 

I  Find  I  am  a  Cuckold, 
I  care  not  who  doth  know  it ; 
It  is  my  Doom,  therefore  welcome, 

I  mean  to  undergo  it. 
Which  makes  me  sing,  Come  along,  come  along, 

All  you  that  deride  or  scorn, 
The  proudest  he  who  e'er  he  be, 
Perchance  will  wear  the  Horn. 

The  Parson  of  our  Parish, 

That  no  Man  thinks  Polluted, 
Along  with  me  for  Company, 

He  kindly  goes  Cornuted. 
Which  makes  me  sing,  come  along,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  1 09 

It  is  a  darksom  Passion, 

And  y_et  there  is  no  fear  on't, 
Like  an  Ague  Fit  they  come  by  it, 

Pew  Gentlemen  are  clear  on't. 
Which,  £c. 

Ten  thousand  in  this  Kingdom, 

Are  subject  to  this  Branding, 
As  Squires  and  Knights,  and  City  Wiglits, 

For  want  of  Understanding. 
Which,  &c. 

The  best  Jest  that  ever  I  heard, 
One  swore  his  Wife  was  Constant, 

When  behind  the  Screen,  and  a  Door  between, 
He  was  Cuckold  in  an  Instant. 
Which,  &c. 

At  Westminster  in  Term  time, 

When  all  the  Lawyers  Musters, 
Like  Bucks  in  May  you  may  see  them  play, 

With  their  Velvet  Shooes  in  Clusters. 
Which,  &c. 

If  you  walk  the  Town  of  London, 

Where  the  Flat-caps  call  Men  Cousins, 
If  you  look  about  my  Masters  out, 

You'll  find  Thirteen  to  the  Dozen. 
Which  makes  me  sing,  Come  along,  come  along, 

All  you  that  deride  or  scorn, 
The  proudest  he  who  Jer  he  be, 

Perchance  will  wear  the  Horn. 


SONGS  Compleat, 
If  every  Woman  was  servd  in  her  kind. 

^^b^zzfrzfbr^pzz^  .  :$z=    =1 
te-_4r-4==EL-4=:         ,  zJES— ^-1 

IF  every  Woman  was  serv'd  in  her  Kind, 
And  every  Man  had  his  due  Desert, 
The  Rooms  in  Bridewel  would  be  well  lin'd, 

And  a  Coach  would  not  pass  in  the  Streets  for  a 

Yet  I'm  a  little  vex'd  at  the  Heart, 

And  fain  wou'd  I  have  my  grief  to  be  known 
The  Parish  would  have  me  play  a  fine  Part, 
And  Father  a  Child  that  is  none  of  my  own. 

Full  Twelve  Months  I  cross'd  the  Seas, 

Mean  time  I  was  crost  as  much  on  the  Land, 
For  all  the  while  my  Wife  sat  at  her  ease, 

And  had  her  Companions  at  her  Command ; 
There's  never  a  Gallant  but  set  at  her  Hand, 

And  said  it  was  pity  she  should  be  alone, 
And  now  they  would  have  me  subscribe  to  a  Bond, 

And  Father,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  tive.  1 1 1 

Let  every  Father  take  care  for  his  Child, 

And  seek  to  provide  for  the  Mother  and  that, 
Altho'  I'm  a  Buck,  I  am  not  so  Wild, 

To  nail  up  my  Horns  for  another  Man's  Hat, 
I'll  never  grieve,  but  let  it  pass, 

Since  'tis  my  Fortune  to  be  overthrown, 
Altho'  I'm  an  Ox,  I'll  ne'er  be  an  Ass, 

To  Father,  &c. 

A  Man  may  be  made  a  Cuckold  by  chance, 

And  put  out  another  Man's  Child  to  Nurse, 
And  hoodwink  his  Horns  with  Ignorance, 

But  he  that's  a  Wittal  is  ten  times  worse ; 
And  that  knows  his  Cross  and  his  Curse, 

And  still  will  be  led  by  a  Strumpet's  Moan, 
May  sit  and  sell  Horns  at  Britain 's  Burse, 

For  Fathering^  &c. 

And  if  that  you  will  be  my  Judge, 

Isn't  that  Man  wonderful  base, 
To  be  another  Man's  Slave  and  his  Drudge, 

And  sell  all  his  Credit  for  Disgrace  ? 
No,  I  was  never  sprung  from  that  Race, 

To  call  that  my  Seed  that  another  hath  sown, 
And  I'll  never  look  our  King  in  the  Face, 

If  I  Father  a  Child  that  is  none  of  my  own. 


SONGS  Compleat, 


T  Prithee  Sweet-heart  grant  me  my  desire, 
\     For  I  am  thrown  as  the  old  Proverb  goes, 
Out  of  the  Frying-pan,  into  the  Fire, 

And  there  is  none  that  pities  my  Woes. 
Then  hang  or  drown  thy  self,  my  Muse, 
For  there  is  not  a  T— d  to  chuse. 

Most  Maids  prove  Coy  of  late,  tho'  they  seem  Holier, 

Yet  I  believe  they  are  all  of  a  Mind  ; 
Like  unto  like,  quoth  the  Devil  to  the  Collier, 

And  they'll  be  true  when  the  Devil  is  Blind  : 
Let  no  one  trust  to  their  desire, 
For  the  burnt  Child  still  dreads  the  Fire. 

What  tho'  my  Love  as  white  as  a  Dove  is, 
Yet  you  would  say,  if  you  knew  all  within  ; 

Shitten  come  Shite  the  beginning  of  Love  is, 
And  for  her  Favour  I  care  not  a  Pin  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  113 

No  Love  of  mine  she  e'er  shall  be, 
Sir-Reverence  of  her  Company.  , 

What  tho'  her  Disdainfulness  my  Heart  hath  cloven, 

Yet  I  am  of  so  stately  a  Mind  j 
I'll  not  creep  in  her  A —  to  bake  in  her  Oven, 

Tho'  'tis  an  old  Proverb,  that  Cat  will  to  kind : 
But  I  will  say  until  I  die, 
Farewel  and  be  hang'd,  that's  twice  Good-bye. 

Alas,  no  Enjoyments,  nor  Comfort  I  can  take, 
In  her  that  regards  not  the  worth  of  a  Lover  ; 

A  T —  is  as  good  for  a  Sow,  as  a  Pancake  : 
Swallow  that  Gudgeon,  I'll  Fish  for  another, 

She  ne'er  regards  my  aking  Heart, 

Tell  a  Mare  a  Tale,  she'll  let  a  Fart. 

Now  I'm  sure  as  my  Shoe  is  made  of  Leather, 
Without  good  advisement  and  fortunate  helps  ; 

We  two  shall  ne'er  set  our  Horses  together, 

For  she's  like  a  Bear  being  rob'd  of  her  Whelps  : 

But  as  for  me  it  shall  ne'er  be  said, 

You've  brought  an  old  House  over  your  Head. 

Lo,  this  is  my  Counsel  to  young  Men  that  Wooe, 
Look  well  before  you  leap,  handle  your  Geer ; 

For  if  you  Wink  and  Shite,  you'll  ne'er  see  what  you 

So  you  may  take  a  wrong  Sow  by  the  Ear : 

But  if  she  prove  her  self  a  Flurt, 

Then  she  may  do  as  does  my  Shirt. 

Fall  Back,  or  fall  Edge,  I  never  shall  bound  be, 
To  make  a  Match  with  Tag-rag,  and  Long-tail ; 

He  that's  born  to  hang,  never  shall  drown'd  be, 
Best  is  best  cheap,  if  you  hit  not  the  Nail : 

Shall  I  toil  Gratis  in  the  Dirt, 

First  she  shall  do  as  does  my  Shirt. 

VOL.  iv.  i  Cupid 

H4  SONGS  Compleat, 

CUPID  no  PHYSICIAN.     Set  by  S.  Teno. 

tx  Tr  *  • 


A  Rest- 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  115 

A  Restless  Lover  I  espy'd, 
That  went  from  Place  to  Place, 
Lay  down  and  turn'd  from  Side  to  Side, 

And  sometimes  on  his  Face  ; 
But  when  those  Med'cines  were  apply'd, 

In  hopes  of  Intermission, 
Like  one  that  found  no  ease,  he  cry'd, 
Has  Cupid  no  Physician. 

What  do  those  Ladies  with  their  Looks, 

Their  Kisse.s  and  their  Smiles  ; 
Can  no  Receipt  in  those  fair  Books, 

Repair  their  former  Spoils  ? 
But  they  complain  as  well  as  we, 

Their  Pains  have  no  remission  ; 
And  when  both  Sexes  wounded  be, 

Hath  Cupid  no  Physician. 

Have  we  such  Palsies  and  such  Pains, 

Such  Fevers  and  such  Fits, 
No  quick  Essential  Chimick  Grains, 

No  SEsculapius  Wits  ? 
No  Creature  can  beneath  the  Sun, 

Prevail  in  opposition, 
And  when  such  Wonders  may  be  done, 

Hath,  &c. 

Into  what  Poisons  do  they  dip, 

Their  Arrows  and  their  Darts, 
That  touching  but  our  Finger  ends, 

The  pain  doth  prick  our  Hearts, 
Now  I  perceive  before  I  get, 

Into  the  Inquisition, 
Death  never  had  a  Surgeon  yet, 

Nor  Cupid  a  Physician. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Young  Maid's  PORTION. 

^_p_U- g^i  «  T > •* ^f-m -£*— 1» 

NOw  all  my  Friends  are  laid  in  Grave, 
And  nothing  they  have  left  me, 
But  a  Mark  a  Year  my  Mother  gave, 
By  which  for  to  protect  me  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  117 

Yet  I  live  on  the  Leagure  still, 
As  brave  as  any  Lady, 
And  all  is  with  a  Mark  a  Year, 
The  which  my  Mother  gave  me. 

I  have  my  Pimps  at  my  Command, 

My  Coach  upon  me  tending, 
If  any  one  be  cut  or  slash'd, 

Or  any  one  Offending, 
They'll  bear  me  out  of  all  the  Rout, 
As  brave  as  any  Lady, 
And  all  is  with  a  Mark  a  Year, 
The  which  my  Mother  gave  me. 

My  high  Commode,  my  Damask  Gown, 

My  lac'd  Shoes  of  Spanish  Leather, 
A  Silver-Bodkin  in  my  Head, 

And  a  dainty  Plume  of  Feather, 
I'll  take  Tobacco  with  a  Grace, 
As  brave  as  any  Lady, 
And  all  is  with  a  Mark  a  Year, 
The  which  my  Mother  gave  me. 

A  Lord,  a  Knight,  a  Gentleman, 

Is  welcome  to  my  Oven  ; 
The  finical  Courtier  with  his  Tricks, 

Whose  Beard's  but  newly  shaven, 
All's  one  to  me,  whoe'er  he  be, 

He's  welcome  still  as  may  be, 
God  a  mercy  Mother,  for  thy  Gift 

It's  a  Portion  for  a  Lady. 


n8  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  RESOLUTION.     Set  by  Mr.  King. 

9-C  — m  0—P & 1-  ^-^ 7-= a-i — f8^ 1^ 1 


NOw  fie  upon  a  Jealous  Brain, 
That  doth  his  Love  mistrust, 
Whose  scorching  Blood  runs  through  each  Vein, 

To  Judge  his  Looks  unjust  : 
Give  me  that  noble  minded  Heart, 

That  never  will  do  so, 
But  Loves  by  Nature,  not  by  Art, 
And  let  all  others  go. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  1 1 9 

Let  no  Man  think  that  Cupids  Shot, 

Can  wound  an  Honest  Breast, 
He  that  still  fears  a  Jealous  Plot, 

Will  never  live  at  rest : 
That  Man  I  love  that  hates  to  fear 

The  slander  of  a  Foe, 
'Tis  he  that  shall  my  Favour  wear, 

And  let  all  others  go. 

If  any  do  my  Vertue  Praise, 

And  thinks  to  flatter  me, 
His  Subtile  Tongue  his  Heart  betrays, 

His  Follies  I  can  see  ; 
That  Man  I'll  have,  will  not  suspect, 

An  honest  Woman's  No, 
Tis  he  shall  be  my  choice  Elect, 

And  let,  &c. 

Some  Men  by  Witchcraft  seek  to  gain, 

Their  Love  with  charmed  Spice, 
Such  Love  I  scorn  to  entertain, 

Fram'd  by  a  base  device  ; 
Til  humour  him  that  seeks  no  Charms, 

Nor  Cerberus  Cups  below, 
I'll  hug  him  in  my  Ivory  Arms, 

And  let,  £c. 

He  that  threatens  when  I  smile, 

I'll  vex  him  when  he  weeps  ; 
He  that  Loves  but  a  Watching  while, 

I'll  Horn  him  when  he  Sleeps  : 
But  he  that  with  unspotted  Breast, 

Bears  Love  as  pure  as  Snow, 
Shall  be  my  Guest  at  Cupid's  Feast, 

And  let  all  others  go. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

LOVE  for  LOVE.     Set  by  Mr.  King. 

SHall  I  wasting  in  Despair, 
Die  because  a  Woman's  Fair, 
Or  make  pale  my  Cheeks  with  Care, 
Because  anothers  Rosie  are  : 
Be  she  Fairer  than  the  Day, 
Or  the  flowry  Mead  in  May, 
If  she  think  not  well  of  me, 
What  care  I  how  Fair  she  be. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 2 1 

Shall  my  foolish  Heart  be  pin'd, 
'Cause  I  see  a  Woman's  kind  ; 
Or  a  well-disposed  Nature 
Joined  with  a  comely  Feature  ? 
Be  she  mild,  or  kinder  than 
The  Turtle-Dove,  or  Pelican  : 
If  she  be  not  so  to  me, 
What  care  I  how  Kind  she  be. 

Shall  a  Woman's  Vertue  move, 
Me  to  Perish  for  her  Love ; 
Or  her  Merits  Value  known, 
Make  me  quite  forget  my  own  ? 
Be  she  with  Goodness  blest, 
As  may  deserve  of  Men  the  best ; 
If  she  be  not  so  to  me, 
What  care  I  how  good  she  be. 

'Cause  her  Fortune  seems  too  high, 
Shall  I  play  the  fool  and  Die  ? 
She  that  bears  a  noble  Mind, 
If  not  outward  Helps  she  find  : 
Thinks  what  with  them  she  will  do, 
That  without  them  she  dares  Wooe  ; 
And  unless  that  Mind  I  see, 
What  care  I  how  good  she  be. 

Be  she  Good,  or  Kind,  or  Fair, 
I  will  ne'er  the  more  Despair  ; 
If  she  love  me,  this  believe, 
I  will  die  e'er  she  shall  Grieve  : 
If  she  slight  me  when  I  Wooe, 
I  will  scorn  and  slight  her  too  ; 
For  if  see  be  not  fit  for  me, 
What  care  I  for  whom  she  be.     ' 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Country  Mans  DELIGHT. 


T  N  Summer  time,  when  Flowers  do  Spring, 
J^      And  Birds  sit  on  a  Tree ; 
Let  Lords  and  Knights  say  what  they  will, 
There's  none  so  Merry  as  we  : 
There's  Will  z&&  Moll, 
Here's  Harry  and  Doll, 
With  Brian  and  bonny  Betty ; 
Oh,  how  they  did  jerk  it, 
Caper  and  ferk  it. 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

Our  Musick  in  a  little  Pipe, 

That  can  so  sweetly  play  ; 
Whom  we  do  hire  from  Whitsontide, 

Till  latter  Lamas-day  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  1  2  3 

On  Sabbath-days, 
And  Holy-days, 

After  Evening-Prayer  comes  he  : 
And  then,  &c. 

Come  play  us  Adam  and  Eve,  says  Dick, 

What's  that,  says  little  Pipe  ? 
It  is  the  beginning  o'  th'  World,  quoth  Dick, 
For  we  are  Dancing-ripe  : 
It's  that  you  call, 
Then  have  at  all, 
He  plaid  with  a  merry  Glee  : 
O  then,  &c. 

In  comes  our  Gaffer  Underwood, 

And  sets  him  on  the  Bench  ; 
His  Wife  and  Daughter  Nder-be-good, 
That  pretty  round-fac'd  Wench  : 
There's  Neighbour  Chuck, 
And  Habakkuk, 
They  all  come  there  to  see  : 
O  how,  &c. 

From  thence  we  go  to  Sir  William's  Ground, 

And  a  Rich  Old  Cub  is  he  ; 
And  there  we  Dance  around,  around, 
But  the  Devil  a  Penny  we  see  : 
From  thence  we  get, 
To  Sommerset, 

Where  Men  be  frolick  and  free  : 
And  there,  &c. 


MY  Lord's  Son  must  not  be  forgot, 
So  full  of  merry  Jest  ; 
ighs  to  see  the  Girls  so  hot, 
And  jumps  in  with  the  rest  : 


124  SONGS  Compleat, 

He  doth  them  assail 
With  his  Calves-Tail, 
And  he  thrusts  it  in  to  see, 
O  how  they  do,  &c. 

A  Pox  of  all  those  snuffling  Knaves, 

That  do  our  Sports  despise  : 
We  value  not  the  sneaking  Slaves, 
They're  more  precise  than  Wise  : 
Bots  on  them  all, 
Both  great  and  small, 
And  such  Hypocrise  : 
For  we  will,  &c. 

Tho'  bonny  Nell  do  bear  the  Bell, 

'Mongst  Gallants  gay  and  gaudy  ; 
Our  Margery's  as  light  as  she, 
And  yet  she  is  not  Baudy  : 
When  she  with  trusty  Arthur  meets, 
And  Bob  with  Barnaby  ; 
O  f  how  they  do  frig  it, 
Jump  it  and  Jigg  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

We  fear  no  Plots  of  Jews  or  Scots, 

For  we  are  jolly  Swains  ; 
With  Plow  and  Cow,  and  Barley-Mow, 
We  busie  all  our  Brains  : 

No  City  Cares, 

Nor  Merchant's  Fears 
Of  Wreck,  or  Piracy  ; 

Therefore  we  can  Plant  it, 

Revel  and  Rant  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

O'er  Hills  and  Dales,  and  Whitson-Ales, 

We  Dance  a  Merry  fit ; 
When  Susan  sweet  with  John  doth  meet, 

She  gives  him  Hit  for  Hit : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  125 

From  Head  to  Foot, 

She  holds  him  to't, 
And  Jumps  as  high  as  he ; 

O  how  they  do  spring  it, 

Flounce  it  and  fling  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

With  Ribbond  red  in  Hat  on  Head, 

Young  Ralph  doth  skip  and  jump ; 
Joan  has  a  new  long  Scarf  of  blue  ; 
That  reaches  to  her  Rump  : 

With  Petticoats 

As  light  as  Moats, 
Which  in  the  Sun  we  see ; 

O  !  how  they  did  skip  it. 

Trample  and  Trip  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

No  time  is  spent  with  more  content, 
In  City,  Court,  or  Camp  ; 
e  fear  no  Covent-Garden  Gout, 
Nor  Pickadilly  Cramp  : 

From  Scurvy  we 

Are  always  free, 
And  evermore  shall  be  ; 

So  long  as  we  Whisk  it, 

Frig  it  and  frisk  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree'. 

On  Meads  and  Launs,  we  trip  like  Fauns, 

Like  Fillies,  Kids,  or  Lambs  \ 
We  have  no  twinge  to  make  us  cringe 
Or  crinkle  in  the  Hams  : 

When  some  Disease 

Doth  on  us  seize, 
With  one  Consent  go  we ; 

To  Jigg  it  and  Jirk  it, 

Caper  and  Ferk  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 


126  SONGS  Compleat, 

When  we're  well  fir'd,  and  almost  tir'd, 

That  Night  is  drawing  on  : 
And  that  we  must  confess  (as  just) 
Our  Dancing  day  is  done  : 

The  Night  is  spent 

With  more  content, 
For  then  we  all  agree  ; 

To  Cock  it  and  Dock  it, 

Smock  and  Knock  it, 
Under  the  Green-wood  Tree. 

A  Mock  SONG  to,  Oh,  lead  me  to  some  Peace 
ful  Gloom.     To  the  same  Tune. 

OH,  oh,  lead  me,  lead  me  to  some  peaceful  Room, 
Where   none   but   honest,   none   but    honest, 

honest  Fellows  come  \ 
Where  our  Wives,  our  Wives  Clappers  never  sound, 

never,  never  sound, 

But  an  eternal  Hush,  an  eternal  Hush  goes  round : 
There  let  me  drown  in  Wine  my  Pain, 
There  let  me  drown  in  Wine  my  Pain, 
And  never,  never  think  of  Home,  never,  never  think 

of  Home,  never,  never  think  of  Home, 
Never,  never,  never,  never,  never  think  of    Home 

again : 
What  Comfort,  what  Comfort,  what  Comfort  can  a 

Husband  have  ? 

Who  Marries,  who  Marries  to  be  a  Slave  ? 
What  Comfort,  what  Comfort  can  a  Husband  have, 
Who  Marries,  who  Marries,  who  Marries  to  be  more, 
More  a  Slave,  to,  to  be  more,  to,  to  be  more,  to,  to  be 

more,  more  a  Slave. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


Three  Glorious  Things. 
Set  by  Mr.  TENOE. 

IT  is  my  Delight  both  Night  and  Day, 
To  Praise  the  Women  as  much  as  I  may ; 
Three  Things  be  glorious, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can-, 
The  Sun,  an  Angel,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight  both  Night  and  Day, 
To  Praise  the  Women  as  much  as  I  may. 


128  SONGS  Compleat, 

Three  things  be  Precious, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
Bright  Pearl,  fine  Gold,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  there  be  Lowring, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 

A  Pidgeon,  a  Turtle-Dove,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  there  be  Loving, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
An  Ape,  an  old  Fox,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  will  be  Angry, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
A  Wasp,  a  Weasel,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  will  be  scratching, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
A  Cat,  a  Brier,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  will  be  a  Chattering, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
A  Pye,  a  Popinjay,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  will  lie  close  to  a  Man, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
A  Flea,  a  Louse,  and  a  Woman. 
It  is  my  Delight,  &c. 

Three  things  must  be  Beaten, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 

A  Stock-fish,  a  Mill-stone,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is  my  Delight,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  129 

Three  things  must  be  stuffed, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can  ; 
A  Pudding,  a  Cushion,  and  a  Woman. 
//  is,  &c. 

Three  things  there  are  ill  to  Tame, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 
The  Devil,  a  Wild-Colt,  and  a  Woman, 
//  M,  &c. 

Three  things  there  are  will  make  you  Lean, 
I'll  tell  you  if  I  can, 

Brown  Bread,  small  drink,  and  a  curst  Quean. 
It  is,  &c. 

From  these  three  Plagues,  I'll  pray  as  I  can, 
To  bless  and  to  keep  every  Honest  Man. 
//  is,  &c. 

A  RIDDLE  Wittily  Expounded. 


VOL.  IV. 


130  SONGS  Compleat, 

THere  was  a  Lady  in  the  North-Country, 
Lay  the  Bent  to  the  Bonny  Broom, 
And  she  had  lovely  Daughters  three, 
Fa,  la  la  la,  fa,  la  la  la  ra  re. 

There  was  a  Knight  of  Noble  worth, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
Which  also  lived  in  the  North, 

Fa,  la,  &c. 

The  Knight  of  Courage  stout  and  brave, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
A  Wife  he  did  desire  to  have, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

He  knocked  at  the  Lady's  Gate, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
One  Evening  when  it  was  late, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

The  youngest  Sister  let  him  in, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
And  pinn'd  the  Door  with  a  Silver  Pin, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

The  second  Sister  she  made  his  Bed, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
And  laid  soft  Pillows  under  his  Head, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

The  Youngest  that  same  Night, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
She  went  to  Bed  to  this  young  Knight, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

And  in  the  Morning  when  it  was  Day, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
These  words  unto  him  she  did  say, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

Now  you  have  had  your  will  (quoth  she) 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
I  pray  Sir  Knight  you  Marry  me, 

Fa  la,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  131 

The  young  brave  Knight  to  her  reply'd, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
Thy  Suit,  Fair  Maid  shall  not  be  deny'd. 

Fa  la,  &c. 

If  thou  can'st  answer  me  Questions  three, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
This  very  Day  I  will  Marry  thee, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

Kind  Sir,  in  Love,  O  then  quoth  she, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
Tell  me  what  your  three  Questions  be, 

Fa  la,  &c, 

O  what  is  longer  than  the  Way  ? 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c 
Or  what  is-  deeper  than  the  Sea  ? 

Fa  la,  &c. 

Or  what  is  louder  than  a  Horn  ? 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
Or  what  is  sharper  than  a  Thorn  ? 

Fa  la,  &c. 

Or  what  is  greener  than  the  Grass  ? 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
Or  what  is  worse  than  a  Woman  was  ? 

Fa  la,  &c. 

The  Damsel's  Answer  to  the  Three  Questions. 

OLove  is  longer  than  the  way, 
Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
And  Hell  is  deeper  than  the  Sea, 
Fa  la,  &c. 

And  Thunder's  louder  than  the  Horn, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
And  Hunger's  sharper  than  a  Thorn, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

K  2  And 

132  SONGS  Compleat, 

And  Poyson's  greener  than  the  Grass, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
And  the  Devil's  worse  than  the  Woman  was, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

When  she  these  Questions  answered  had, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
The  Knight  became  exceeding  glad, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

And  having  truly  tried  her  Wit, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
He  much  commended  her  for  it, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

And  after  as  'tis  verifi'd, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
He  made  of  her  his  lovely  Bride, 

Fa  la,  &c. 

So  now  fair  Maidens  all  adieu, 

Lay  the  Bent,  &c. 
This  Song  I  dedicate  to  you, 
Fa  la,  &c. 

I  wish  that  you  may  Constant  prove, 
Lay  the  Bent  to  the  bonny  Broom, 

Unto  the  Man  that  you  do  Love, 
fat  la  la  la,  fa,  la  la  la  ra  re. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  tive. 

The  Cumberland  LASS. 

THere  was  a  Lass  in  Cumberland, 
A  bonny  Lass  of  high  Degree  : 
There  was  a  Lass,  her  Name  was  Nell, 
The  blithest  Lass  that  e'er  you  see  : 
Oh  /  to  Bed  to  me,  to  Bed  to  me, 

The  Lass  that  comes  to  Bed  to  me  : 
Blith  and  bonny  may  she  be, 

The  Lass  that  comes  to  Bed  to  me. 

Her  Father  lov'd  her  passing  well, 
So  did  her  Brother  fancy  Nell : 

But  all  their  Loves  came  short  of  mine, 
As  far  as  Tweed  \s  from  the  Tyne, 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  to  Bed  to  me,  £c. 

She  had  five  Dollars  in  a  Chest, 
Four  of  them  she  gave  to  me ; 

She  cut  her  Mother's  Winding-Sheet, 
And  all  to  make  a  Sark  for  me, 

Oh  /  to  Bed  to  me,  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 


134  SONGS  Compleat, 

She  pluck'd  a  Box  out  of  her  Purse, 
Of  four  Gold  Rings  she  gave  me  three 

She  thought  herself  no  whit  the  worse, 
She  was  so  very  kind  to  me, 

Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

If  I  were  Lord  of  all  the  North, 

To  Bed  and  Board  she  should  be  free, 

For  why,  she  is  the  bonniest  Lass, 
That  is  in  all  her  own  Country, 
Oh  /  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

Her  Cherry-Cheeks  and  Ruby  Lips, 
Doth  with  the  Damask  Rose  agree, 

With  other  Parts  which  I'll  not  Name, 
Which  are  so  pleasing  unto  me  : 
Oh  /  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

For  I  have  rid  both  East  and  West, 
And  been  in  many  a  strange  Country, 

Yet  never  met  with  so  kind  a  Lass, 
Compared  with  Cumberland  Nelly. 
Oh  /  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

When  I  embrace  her  in  my  Arms, 
She  takes  it  kind  and  courteously, 

And  hath  such  pretty  winning  Charms, 
The  like  whereof  you  ne'er  did  see  : 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

There's  not  a  Lass  in  Cumberland 

To  be  compar'd  to  smiling  Nell, 
She  hath  so  soft  and  white  a  Hand, 

And  something  more  that  I'll  not  tell, 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  tive.  135 

Up  to  my  Chamber  I  her  got, 
There  I  did  treat  her  courteously, 

I  told  her,  I  thought  it  was  her  Lot 
To  stay  all  Night  and  Lig  with  me, 
Oh  7  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

She,  pretty  Rogue,  could  not  say  nay, 

But  by  consent  we  did  agree, 
That  she  for  a  fancy,  there  should  stay, 

And  come  at  night  to  Bed  to  me  ; 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

She  made  the  Bed  both  broad  and  wide, 
And  with  her  Hand  she  smooth'd  it  down ; 

She  kiss'd  me  thrice,  and  smiling  said, 
My  Love,  I  fear  thou  wilt  sleep  to  soon  : 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

Into  my  Bed  I  hasted  strait, 

And  presently  she  follow'd  me, 
It  was  in  vain  to  make  her  wait, 

For  a  Bargain  must  a  Bargain  be, 
O  /  to  Bed  to  me,  &c. 

Then  I  embrac'd  this  lovely  Lass, 

And  strok'd  her  Wem  so  bonnily, 
But  for  the  rest  we'll  let  it  pass, 

For  she  afterward  sung  Lulaby ; 
Oh  !  to  Bed  to  me,  to  Bed  to  me, 

The  Lass  that  came  to  Bed  to  me, 
Blith  and  Bonny  sure  was  she, 

The  Lass  that  came  to  Bed  to  me. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Northumberland  BAGPIPE. 


0— I 

A  Shepherd  set  him  under  a  Thorn, 
He  pulFd  out  his  Pipe  and  began  for  to  play, 
It  was  on  a  Midsummers- day  in  the  Morn, 

For  Honour  of  that  Holy-day : 
A  Ditty  he  did  chant  along, 

That  goes  to  the  Tune  of  Cater-Bordee   , 
And  this  was  the  burthen  of  his  Song, 
Ifthou  wilt  Pipe  Lad  I'll  dance  to  thee, 
to  thee,  to  thee,  derry,  derry,  to  thee,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  137 

And  whilst  this  Harmony  he  did  make, 

A  Country  Damsel  from  the  Town, 
A  Basket  on  her  Arm  she  had, 

A  gathering  Rushes  on  the  Down ; 
Her  Bongrace  of  Wended  Straw  ; 

From  the  Sun's  hot  Beams  her  Face  is  free, 
And  thus  she  began  when  she  him  saw, 

If  thou  wilt  Pipe  Lad,  Pll  dance  to  thee,  &c. 

Then  he  pull'd  out  his  Pipe,  and  began  to  sound, 

Whilst  tempting  on  her  Back  she  lay, 
But  when  his  quavering  Note  she  found, 

How  sweetly  then  this  Lass  could  Play  : 
She  stopp'd  all  Jumps,  and  she  reveal'd, 

She  kept  all  Time  with  Harmony, 
And  looking  on  him,  sighing  said, 

If  thou  wilt  Pipe  Lad,  I'll  Dance  to  thee,  £c. 

She  never  so  much  as  blush'd  at  all, 

The  Musick  was  so  charming  sweet, 
But  e'er  anon  to  him  she'd  call, 

And  bid  him  active,  turn  and  meet ; 
As  thou  art  a  boon  Shepherd's  Swain, 

I  am  a  Lass  am  come  to  Wooe  thee, 
To  play  me  another  double  Strain, 

And  doubt  not  but  I  will  Dance  to  thee,  &c. 

Altho'  I  am  but  a  silly  Maid, 

Who  ne'er  was  brought  up  at  Dancing-School, 
But  yet  to  the  Jig  that  thou  hast  plaid, 

You  find  that  I  can  keep  Time  and  Rule  ! 
Now  see  that  you  keep  your  Stops  aright, 

For  Shepherd,  I  am  resolv'd  to  view  thee, 
And  play  me  the  Damsel's  chief  Delight, 

Then  never  doubt  but  I'll  Dance  to  thee,  &c. 

The  Shepherd  again  did  Tune  his  Pipe, 
And  plaid  her  a  Lesson  loud  and  shrill, 

The  Damsel  his  Face  did  often  wipe, 
With  many  a  Thank  for  his  Good  Will ; 


138  SONGS  Comp leafy 

And  said,  I  was  ne'er  so  pleas'd  before, 
And  this  is  the  first  time  that  I  knew  thee, 

Come  play  me  this  very  Jig  once  more, 
And  never  doubt  but  III  Dance  to  thee,  &c. 

The  Shepherd,  he  said,  as  I  am  a  Man, 

I  have  kept  Playing  from  Morning  till  Noon, 

Thou  know'st  I  can  do  no  more  than  I  can ; 
My  Pipe  is  clearly  out  of  Tune  ; 

To  ruin  a  Shepherd  I'll  not  seek, 

Said  she,  for  why  should  I  undo  thee, 

I  can  come  again  to  the  Down  next  Week, 
And  thou  shall  Pipe,  and  I'll  Dance  to 
to  thee,  to  thee,  derry,  derry  to  thee. 

The  Hide-Park  FROLICK. 

Pleasant  and  Diver tive. 


ONE  Evening  a  little  before  it  was  dark, 
sing,  tan  tara  rara  tan-vivee  ; 
I  call'd  for  my  Gelding,  and  rid  to  Hide-park, 

on  tan  tara,  rara  tan-tivee ; 
It  was  in  the  merry  Month  of  May, 
When  Meadows  and  Fields  were  gaudy  and  Gay, 
And  Flowers  apparell'd  as  bright  as  the  Day, 
/  got  upon  my  Tan-tivee. 

The  Park  shone  brighter  than  the  Skies, 

sing  tan  tara,  rara  Tan-tivee, 
With  Jewels  and  Gold,  and  Ladies  Eyes, 

that  sparkled,  and  cry'd,  come  see  me ; 
Of  all  parts  of  England,  Hide-park  hath  the  Name, 
For  Coaches  and  Horses  and  Persons  of  Fame, 
It  looked  at  first  sight  like  a  Field  full  of  Flame, 
Which  made  me  Ride  up  Tan-tivee. 

There  hath  not  been  such  sight  since  Adam's, 

for  Perriwig,  Ribbond,  and  Feather, 
Hide-park  may  be  term'd  the  Market  of  Madams, 

or,  Lady-Fair,  chuse  you  whither : 
Their  Gowns  were  a  Yard  too  long  for  their  Legs, 
They  shew'd  like  the  Rain-bow  cut  into  Rags, 
A  Garden  of  Flowers,  or  a  Navy  of  Flags, 
When  they  did  all  mingle  together. 


140  SONGS  Compleat, 

Among  all  these  Ladies,  I  singled  out  one, 

to  prattle  of  Love  and  Folly  ; 
I  found  her  not  Coy,  but  jovial  as  Joan, 

or  Betty,  or  Marget,  or  Molly  : 
With  honours  and  Love,  and  stories  of  Chances, 
My  Spirits  did  move,  and  my  Blood  she  advances, 
With  Twenty  Quadundrums,  and  Fifty  Five  Fancies, 
Pd  have  been  at  her  Tan-tivee. 

We  talk'd  away  time  until  it  grew  dark, 

the  Place  did  begin  to  grow  privy ; 
For  Gallants  began  to  draw  out  of  the  Park, 

to  their  Horses  did  gallop  Tan-tivee  : 
But  finding  my  Courage  a  little  to  come, 
I  sent  my  Bay  Gelding  away  by  the  Groom, 
And  proffer'd  my  Service  to  wait  on  her  Home, 
/;/  her  Coach  we  went  both  Tan-tivee. 

I  offer'd  and  proffer'd,  but  found  her  strait-lac'd, 

she  cry'd  I  shall  never  believe  ye  ; 
This  Arm  full  of  Sattin  I  bravely  embrac'd, 

and  fain  would  have  been  at  Tan-tivee  : 
Her  Lodging  was  pleasant  for  scent  and  for  sight, 
She  seem'd  like  an  Angel  by  Candle-light, 
And  like  a  bold  Archer,  I  aim'd  at  the  White, 
Tan-tivee,  tan-tivee,  tan-tivee. 

With  many  Denials  she  yielded  at  last, 

her  Chamber  being  wondrous  privy, 
That  I  all  the  Night  there  might  have  my  repast, 

to  run  at  the  Ring  Tan-tivee. 
I  put  off  my  Cloaths,  and  I  tumbled  to  Bed, 
She  went  to  her  Closet  to  dress  up  her  Head, 
But  I  peep'cl  in  the  Key-hole  to  see  what  she  did, 
Which  put  me  quite  beside  my  Tan-tivee. 

She  took  off  her  Head-tire,  and  shew'd  her  bald  Pate, 
Her  Cunning  did  very  much  grieve  me, 

Thought  I  to  my  self,  if  it  were  not  so  late, 
I  would  home  to  my  Lodgings  believe  me. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  141 

Her  Hair  being  gone,  she  seem'd  like  a  Hag, 
Her  bald-pate  did  look  like  an  Ostrich's  Egg, 
This  Lady  (thought  I)  is  as  right  as  my  Leg, 
She  hath  been  too  much  at  Tan-tivee. 

The  more  I  did  peep,  the  more  I  did  spy, 

Which  did  unto  amazement  drive  me ; 
She  put  up  her  Finger,  and  out  dropt  her  Eye, 

I  pray'd  that  some  Power  would  relieve  me : 
But  now  my  resolves  was  never  to  trouble  her, 
Or  venture  my  Carcase  with  such  a  blind  Hobler, 
She  look'd  with  One  Eye,  just  like  Hewson  the  Cobler, 
When  he  us'd  to  Ride  Tan-tivee. 

I  peep'd,  and  was  still  more  perplexed  therewith, 

Thought  I,  tho't  be  Midnight  I'll  leave  thee ; 
She  fetch'd  a  yawn,  and  out  fell  her  Teeth, 
This  Quean  had  intents  to  deceive  me  : 
She  drew  out  her  Handkerchief  as  I  suppose, 
To  wipe  her  high  Fore-head,  off  dropt  her  Nose, 
Which  made  me  run  quickly  and  put  on  my  Hose, 
The  Devil  is  in  my  Tan-tivee. 

She  washt  all  the  Paint  from  her  Visage,  and  then 

She  look'd  just  (if  you  will  believe  me) 
Like  a  Lancashire  Witch  of  Four  score  and  Ten, 

And  as  the  Devil  did  drive  me  : 
I  put  on  my  Cloaths,  and  cry'd  Witches  and  Whores, 
I  tumbl'd  down  Stairs,  broke  open  the  Doors, 
And  down  to  my  Country  again  to  my  Boors, 
Next  Morning  I  rid  Tan-tivee. 

You  North-Co\miry  Gallants  that  live  pleasant  Lives, 

Let  not  Curiosity  drive  ye  ; 
To  leave  the  fresh  Air,  and  your  own  Tenants  Wives, 

For  Sattin  will  sadly  deceive  you  : 
For  my  part  I  will  no  more  be  such  a  Meacock, 
To  deal  with  the  plumes  of  a  Hide-Park  Peacock, 
But  find  out  a  Russet-coat  Wench  and  a  Hay-cock, 
And  there  I  will  ride  Tan-tivee* 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Beggars  DELIGHT. 

COurtiers,  Courtiers,  think  it  no  harm, 
That  silly  poor  Swains  in  Love  should  be  ; 
For  Love  lies  hid  in  Rags  all  torn, 

As  well  as  Silks  and  Bravery : 
For  the  Beggar  he  loves  his  Lass  as  dear, 

As  he  that  hath  Thousands,  Thousands,  Thousands, 
He  that  hath  Thousand  Pounds  a  Year. 

State  and  Title  are  pitiful  things, 

A  lower  State  more  happy  doth  prove  ; 

Lords  and  Ladies,  Princes  and  Kings, 

With  the  Beggar  hath  equal  Joys  in  Love  : 

And  my  pretty  brown  Cloris  upon  the  Hay, 
Hath  always  as  killing,  killing,  killing, 

Hath  always  as  killing  Charms  as  they. 

A  Lord  will  purchase  a  Maiden-head, 

Which  perhaps  hath  been  lost  some  Years  before  ; 
A  Beggar  will  pawn  his  Cloak  and  his  Trade, 

Content  with  Love  to  lye,  and  live  Poor  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 43 

Our  eager  Embraces  in  Coal-sheds, 

Are  always  more  pleasing,  pleasing,  pleasing, 
Than  theirs  that  are  dull  in  downy  Beds. 

Our  Claris  is  free  from  Patches  and  Paint, 
Complection  and  Features  sweetly  agree  ; 

Perfections  which  Ladies  often  do  want, 
Is  always  intaiFd  on  our  Pedigree  : 

Sweet  Cloris  in  her  own  careless  Hair, 
Is  always  more  taking,  taking,  taking, 

Than  Ladies  that  Towers  and  Pendants  do  wear. 

A  Dutchess  may  fail,  created  for  Sport, 
By  using  of  Art,  and  changing  of  Things  ; 

Tho'  she  were  the  Idol  and  Goddess  o'th'  Court, 
The  Joys  and  the  Pleasure  of  Don,  Prince,  or  Kings, 

Yet  Cloris  in  her  old  Russet-Gown, 
She's  sound,  she's  sound,  she's  sound, 

And  free  from  the  Plague  and  Pox  of  the  Town. 

A  Beggar's  as  boon  aud  as  brisk  in  the  dark, 
As  she  that  is  Painted  Red  and  White ; 

And  pleases  her  Mate,  tho'  not  such  a  Spark, 
As  lies  by  the  side  of  a  Lord  or  Knight : 

And  Cloris  hath  Beauty  to  Content, 

So  long  as  she's  wholsom,  wholsom,  wholsom, 

She  pleases  us,  we  don't  repent. 

What  tho'  all  the  Day  she's  attir'd  in  Rags, 
Yet  once  a  Week  she  changes  her  Smock ; 

And  she  that  has  Gold  and  Silver  in  Bags, 

She  can  do  no  more  than  match  a  good  Cock  : 

She's  willing  and  ready  to  show  her  Art, 
And  still  with  her  Kisses,  Kisses,  Kisses, 

She'll  conquer  the  Senses  and  the  Heart. 

All  the  Night  long  we  do  hug  and  embrace, 
The  greatest  and  Rich  can  do  no  more ; 

And  when  to  the  Swain  she  joins  her  Face, 
He  thinketh  what  Joys  there's  for  him  in  store  : 


144  SONGS  Compleat, 

By  the  taste  of  the  Blisses,  so  happy's  he, 

He  crys  there's  no  Beggar,  Beggar,  Beggar, 
Could  so  blest,  or  so  fortunate  be. 

The  touch  of  her  Hand  encreases  his  Flame, 
Who  conquer'd  by  Charms  a  Captive  doth  lie  ; 

And  when  he  but  thinks  of  his  true  Love's  Name, 
He  vows  for  her  sake  he  could  freely  Die  : 

Then  she  revives  him  again  with  a  Kiss, 
He  cries  you  undo  me,  undo  me,  undo  me, 

Had  ever  poor  Soul  such  Pleasure  as  this  ? 

Then  Gallants,  ne'er  envy  the  Poor's  Delight, 
Tis  Pleasure  to  Love,  and  a  Plague  to  be  Free ; 

Tho'  some  for  our  Poverty  do  us  slight, 
There's  none  alive  more  happy  than  we : 

We  well  are  content  with  what  we  enjoy, 

And  once  in  a  twelvemonth,  twelvemonth,  twelve 

We  are  blest  with  a  Girl,  or  a  Boy, 

Content  is  a  thing  we  strive  to  possess, 

And  better  it  is  than  a  Golden  Mine : 
Since  us  with  the  same  the  Heaven  do  bless, 

What  cause  have  we  for  to  repine  : 
No,  we've  enough  our  Hearts  to  suffice, 

And  he  that  doth  murmur,  murmur,  murmur, 
Will  never  be  happy  nor  wise. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

JOAN  to  the  MAY-POLE. 

JOan  to  the  May-pole  away  let's  run, 
The  time  is  swift,  and  will  be  gone  : 
There  go  the  Lasses  away  to  the  Green, 
Where  their  Beauties  may  be  seen  ; 

Nan,  Noll,  Kate  and  Moll, 
Brave  Lasses  have  Lads  to  attend  'em, 

Hodge,  Nick,  Tom,  Dick, 
Brave  Country  Dancers,  who  can  amend  'em  ? 

Did  you  not  see  the  Lord  of  the  May, 
Walk  along  in  his  rich  Array  ? 
There  goes  the  Lass  that  is  only  his, 
See  how  they  meet,  and  how  they  Kiss  ! 
VOL.  iv.  L  Come 

146  SONGS  Compleat, 

Come  Will,  run  Gill, 
Or  dost  thou  list  to  lose  thy  Labour  ? 

Kit  Crowd,  scrape  aloud, 
Tickle  her  Tom,  with  a  Pipe  and  a  Tabor. 

Lately  I  went  to  a  Masque  at  Court, 
Where  I  see  Dances  of  evrry  sort ; 
There  they  did  Dance  with  Time  and  Measure, 
But  none  like  Country  Dance  for  Pleasure  : 

There  they  did  Dance,  just  as  in  France, 
Not  like  the  English  lofty  manner  ; 

And  every  She  must  furnished  be 
With  a  feather'd  knack,  when  she  sweats,  for  to  fan  hen 

But  we,  when  we  Dance,  and  do  happen  to  sweat 
Have  a  Napkin  in  hand  for  to  wipe  off  the  wet ; 
And  we  with  our  Doxies  do  jigg  it  about, 
Not  like  the  Court,  which  often  are  out : 

If  the  Tabor  do  play,  we  thump  it  away, 
And  turn,  and  meet  our  Lasses  to  Kiss  'em  ; 

Nay,  they  will  be  as  ready  as  we, 
That  hardly  at  any  time  can  miss  'ern. 

Yonder  comes  Dolly  over  the  down, 
And  Roger  he  gives  her  a  fair  Green-Gown, 
See  how  he  Hands  her  up  again, 
And  how  they  trip  along  amain  : 

They  pass  o'er  the  Grass, 
And  at  every  Stile  they  are  Billing, 

He  gives,  she  receives, 
Being  Youthful,  Ready,  and  Willing. 

There  is  not  any  that  shall  out-vie, 
My  little  pretty  Joan  and  1 ; 
For  I'm  sure  I  can  Dance  as  well, 
As  Robin,  Jenny,  Tom  and  Nell: 

Last  Year  we  were  here, 
When  rough  Ralph  he  plsy'd  us  a  Boree, 

And  we  merrily 
Thump'd  it  about,  and  gain'd  the  Glory. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 4  7 

Come,  sweet  Joan,  let  us  call  a  New  Dance, 
That  we  before  'em  may  advance  ; 
Let  it  be  what  you  desire  and  crave, 
And  sure  the  same  sweet  Joan  shall  have : 

She  cry'd,  and  reply'd, 
If  to  please  me  thou  wilt  endeavour, 

Sweet  Pig,  the  Wedding-Jig, 
Then  my  Dear  I'll  love  thee  for  ever. 

Sure  I  will  grant  thee  thy  request, 
And  learn  thee  that  amongst  the  rest ; 
For  e'er  it  be  long,  we'll  Married  be, 
And  then  my  pretty  Joan  shall  see, 

Fine  Toys,  sweet  Joys, 
And  soft  Kisses  too,  out  of  Measure, 

Sweet  Charms  in  my  Arms, 
This  will  be  a  Fountain  of  Pleasure. 

And  if  we  hold  on  as  we  begin, 
Joan^  thee  and  I  the  Garland  shall  win ; 
Nay,  if  thou  live  till  another  day, 
I'll  make  thee  Lady  of  the  May, 

Dance  about,  in  and  out, 
Turn  and  Kiss,  and  then  for  Greeting ; 

Now  Joan,  we  have  done, 
Fare  thee  well  till  next  merry  Meeting. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Wiltshire  WEDDING. 

ALL  in  a  misty  Morning, 
cloudy  was  the  Weather, 
I  meeting  with  an  old  Man, 

was  cloathed  all  in  Leather, 
With  ne'er  a  Shirt  unto  his  Back, 

but  Wool  unto  his  Skin  ; 
With  hoiv  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  't 
and  how  do  you  do  agen  ? 

The  Rustick  was  a  Thresher, 

and  on  his  way  he  hy'd, 
And  with  a  Leather  Bottle, 

fast  Buckl'd  by  his  side  : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 49 

And  with  a  Cap  of  Woollen, 

which  cover'd  Cheek  and  Chin, 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  1 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 

I  went  a  little  further, 

and  there  I  met  a  Maid, 
Was  going  then  a  Milking, 

a  Milking  Sir,  she  said  : 
Then  I  began  to  Compliment, 

and  she  began  to  Sing  ; 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  f 

a  nd  how  do  you  do  agen. 

This  Maid  her  Name  was  Dolly, 

cloath'd  in  a  Gown  of  Gray, 
I  being  somewhat  Jolly, 

perswaded  her  to  stay : 
Then  strait  I  fell  to  Courting  her, 

in  hopes  her  Love  to  win, 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  ? 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 

Then  having  time  and  leisure, 

I  spent  a  vacant  hour, 
Telling  of  all  my  Treasure, 

whilst  sitting  in  the  Bower  : 
With  many  kind  Embraces, 

I  stroak'd  her  double  Chin  : 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  ? 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 

I  told  her  I  would  Marr/d  be, 

and  she  should  be  my  Bride, 
And  long  we  should  not  tarry, 

with  twenty  things  beside  : 
I'll  Plow  and  Sow,  and  Reap  and  Mow, 

while  thou  shalt  sit  and  Spin  ; 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  ? 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 


150  SONGS  Compleat, 

Did  you  not  know  my  Father, 

the  Damsel  then  reply'd, 
His  Jerkin  was  of  Leather, 

a  Bottle  by  his  side  : 
Yes,  I  did  meet  him  trudging, 

as  fast  as  he  could  win, 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  f 

and  how  do  you  do  ageti. 

Kind  Sir,  I  have  a  Mother, 

beside  a  Father,  still, 
Those  Friends  above  all  other, 

you  must  ask  their  good  will : 
For  if  I  be  Undutiful 

to  them,  it  is  a  Sin  ; 
With  how,  &c. 

Now  there  we  left  the  Milk-pail, 

And  to  her  Mother  went, 
And  when  I  was  come  thither, 

I  asked  her  Consent, 
And  doft  my  Hat,  and  made  a  Leg, 

for  why  she  was  within  ; 
With  how,  &c. 

My  Husband  is  a  Thresher, 

who  is  her  Father  dear, 
He'll  give  with  her  his  Blessing, 

kind  Sir,  you  need  not  fear  ; 
He  is  of  such  good  Nature, 

that  he  would  never  lin, 
With  how,  &c. 

For  by  your  Courteous  Carnage, 

you  seem  an  honest  Man, 
You  may  have  her  in  Marriage, 

my  Husband  he  anon, 
Will  bid  you  very  welcome, 

tho'  he  be  poor  and  thin, 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  you  do  ? 

And  how  do  you  do  agen. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  151 

Her  Dad  cams  home  full  weary, 

alas  !  he  could  not  chuse  ; 
Her  Mother  being  Merry, 

She  told  him  all  the  News  : 
Then  he  was  mighty  Jovial  too, 

his  Son  did  soon  begin, 
With  how  do  you  do  2  and  how  do  you  do  ? 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 

Her  Parents  being  willing, 

all  Parties  was  agreed  ; 
Her  Portion  thirty  Shilling, 

they  Marry'd  were  with  speed  ; 
Then  Will  the  Piper  he  did  play, 

while  others  Dance  and  Sing ; 
With  how,  tec. 

In  pleasant  Recreation, 

they  pass'd  away  the  Night, 
And  likewise  by  relation, 

with  her  he  takes  delight, 
To  walk  abroad  on  Holy-days, 

to  visit  Kiff  and  Kin  : 
With  how,  &c. 

Then  lusty  Ralph  and  Robin, 

With  many  Damsels  gay, 
Did  ride  on  Roan  and  Dobbin, 

to  Celebrate  the  day  : 
When  being  met  together, 

their  Caps  they  off  did  fling, 
With  how  do  you  do  ?  and  how  do  yau  do  ? 

and  how  do  you  do  agen. 


SONGS   Compleat, 

The  Country  LASS. 




WHat  tho'  I  am  a  Country  Lass, 
A  lofty  mind  I  bear  a  ; 
I  think  my  self  as  good  as  those, 

That  Gay  Apparel  wear  a  : 
What  tho'  my  Coat  be  Home-spun  Gray, 

My  Skin  it  is  as  soft  a, 
As  those  that  in  their  Cypress  Veils, 
Do  carry  their  Heads  aloft  a. 

What  tho'  I  keep  my  Father's  Sheep, 
Tis  a  thin£  that  must  be  done  a, 

A  Garland  of  the  choicest  Flow'rs, 
Shall  shade  me  from  the  Sun  a  ; 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  153 

And  where  I  see  the  feeding  Bee, 
When  Grass  and  Flowers  spring  a, 

Hard  by  a  Chrystal  Fountain  Stream, 
I  sit  me  down  and  Sing  a. 

My  Leather  Bottle  stufft  with  Sage, 

My  Drink  it  is  but  thin  a, 
No  Wine  hath  taught  my  brains  to  rage, 

Nor  tempt  my  Blood  to  sin  a  ; 
My  Country  Curds,  my  Wooden  Spoon, 

My  things  are  very  Fine  a, 
And  on  some  Flow'ry  Bank  at  Noon, 

I  sit  me  down  and  Dine  a. 

What  tho'  my  Portion  will  allow, 

No  Bags  of  shining  Gold  a, 
As  Farmers  Daughters  now  adays, 

Like  Swine  are  Bought  and  Sold  a; 
I'll  keep  my  Naked  Body  sound, 

And  an  Honest  Soul  within  a, 
And  for  a  Hundred  Thousand  Pounds, 

I  value  it  not  a  Pin  a. 

I  have  no  Jewels  in  my  Ears, 

Nor  Jems  to  deck  my  Neck  a; 
Nor  Glittering  Rings  with  Stones  I  wear, 

My  Fingers  for  to  Deck  a 
But  for  the  Man  when  e'er  it  chance, 

That  I  shall  Grace  to  Wed  a, 
I'll  keep  a  Jewel  worth  them  all, 

I  mean  my  Maiden-Head  a. 


154  SONGS  Compleat, 


^  — Vi   '^..  -j--  fr~y     ^.i 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  155 

WAs  ever  a  Man  so  vext  with  a  Trull, 
As  I  poor  Anthony,  since  I  was  Wed, 
For  I  never  got  my  Belly  full, 

But  e're  I  have  supp'd,  I  must  hasten  to  Bed  : 
Else  she'd  begin  to  Scold  and  to  Brawl, 
And  to  call  me  Puppy,  and  Cuckold,  and  all ; 
Yet  she  with  her  Cronies  must  troul  it  about, 
Whilst  I  in  my  Kennel  must  snore  it  out. 

I  once  did  go  to  drink  with  a  Friend, 

But  she  in  a  trice  did  fetch  me  away, 
We  both  but  Two-pence  a-piece  did  spend, 

Yet  proved  to  me  Execution- day. 
For  she  flew  in  my  Face,  and  call'd  me  Fool, 
And  comb'd  my  head  with  a  three-legged  Stool ; 
Nay,  she  furnish'd  my  Face  with  so  many  Scratches, 
That  for  a  whole  Month  'twas  cover'd  with  Patches. 

Whatever  Money  I  get  in  a  day, 

To  keep  her  in  quiet,  I  give  her  at  Night ; 
Or  else  she'll  license  her  Tongue  to  play, 

For  two  or  three  Hours,  just  like  a  Sprite, 
Then  to  the  Cupboard  Peel  garlick  must  hie, 
To  see  for  some  Crusts  that  long  have  lain  dry, 
So  steep  'em  in  Skim-milk  until  they  are  wet, 
And  commonly  this  is  the  Supper  I  get. 

And  once  a  Month  for  fashion's  sake, 

She  gives  me  leave  to  come  to  her  Bed, 
But  most  of  that  time  I  must  lie  awake, 

Lest  she  in  her  Fits  should  knock  me  o'th  head. 
But  as  for  the  Bed  I  lie  on  my  self; 
You'd  think  'twere  as  soft  as  an  Oaken  Shelf : 
For  the  Tick  it  is  made  of  Hempen  Hurds, 
And  yet  for  all  this,  I  must  give  her  good  words. 


..15-6  SONGS  Compleat, 

We  commonly  both  do  piss  in  a  pan, 

But  the  Cullender  once  was  set  in  the  place  ; 

She  then  did  take  it  up  in  her  Hand, 

And  flounc'd  it  out  on  my  Stomach  and  Face. 

I  told  her  then  she  went  beside, 

But  she  call'd  me  Rogue,  and  told  me  I  ly'd. 

And  swore  it  was  not  up  to  her  Thumb. 

And  then  threw  the  pan  i'th'  middle  o'th'  Room. 

Then  a  Maid  that  was  my  Sweet-heart  before, 

Did  come  to  the  House  to  borrow  a  Pail ; 
I  Kiss'd  her  but  once,  and  I  thought  on't  no  more, 

But  she  flew  in  her  Face  Tooth  and  Nail. 
But  the  Wench  stood  to  her  and  claw'd  her  about, 
That  for  a  whole  Fortnight  she  never  stir'd  out ; 
For  her  Face  was  so  swell'd,  and  her  Eyes  were  so  sore, 
That  I  never  saw  Jade  so  mangl'd  before. 

She  then  did  bid  me  drop  in  her  Eyes, 

A  sovereign  Water  sent  her  that  Day  : 
But  I  had  a  Liquor  I  more  did  prize, 

Made  of  Henbane  and  Mercury  steep'd  in  Whey, 
I  dropt  in  and  anointed  her  Face, 
Which  brought  her  into  a  most  dev'lish  case  ; 
For  she  tore  and  ranted,  and  well  she  might, 
For  after  that  time  she  never  saw  sight. 

I  then  did  get  her  a  Dog  and  a  Bell, 

To  lead  her  about  from  place  to  place  ; 
And  now  'tis  Husband  I  hope  ye  arc  well; 

Before  'twas  Cuckold  and  Rogue  to  my  Face, 
Then  blest  be  that  Henbane  and  Mercury  strong, 
That  made  such  a  change  in  my  Wife's  Tongue  ; 
You  see  'tis  a  Med'cine  certain  and  sure, 
For  the  cure  of  a  Scold,  but  I'll  say  no  more. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


The  Ballad  of  the  CAPS 

!       P 

Wit  hath  long  beholding  been, 
^     Unto  the  Cap  to  keep  it  in, 
But  now  the  Wits  fly  out  amain 

In  praise  to  quit  the  Cap  again  : 

The  Cap  that  keeps  the  highest  part 

Obtains  the  place  by  due  desert : 

for  any  Cap,  whatever  it  be, 

Is  still  the  sign  of  some  degree. 


158  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Monmouth  Cap,  the  Sailors  Thumb, 
And  that  wherein  the  Tradesmen  come, 

The  Physick  Cap,  the  Cap  Divine, 

And  that  which  Crowns  the  Muses  nine, 

The  Cap  that  Fools  do  Countenance, 
The  goodly  Cap  of  Maintenance, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  sickly  Cap  both  plain  and  wrought, 
The  Fudling  Cap  how  ever  bought, 

The  Worsted,  Furr'd,  the  Velvet,  Sattin, 
For  which  so  many  pates  learn  Latin, 

The  Cruel  Cap,  the  Fustian  Pate, 
The  Periwig  a  Cap  of  late  : 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Souldiers  that  the  Monmouth  were, 
On  Castle-tops  their  Ensigns  rear  ; 

The  Sea-man  with  his  Thrumb  doth  stand 
On  higher  parts  than  all  the  land ; 

The  Tradesman's  Cap  aloft  is  born, 
By  Vantage  of  a  stately  horn. 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Physick  Cap  to  dust  can  bring, 
Without  controul  the  greatest  King, 

The  Lawyers  Cap  hath  Heavenly  might 
To  make  a  crooked  action  straight ; 

And  if  you'll  line  him  in  the  Fist, 
The  Cause  he'll  warrant  as  he  list, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

Both  East  and  West,  and  North  and  South, 

Where'er  the  Gospel  hath  a  mouth, 
The  Cap  Divine  doth  thither  look  ; 

'Tis  Square  like  Scholars  and  their  Books  : 
The  rest  are  Round,  but  this  is  Square, 
To  shew  their  Wits  more  stable  are  : 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  tive.  159 

The  Jester  he  a  Cap  doth  wear, 

Whick  makes  him  fellow  for  a  Peer, 

And  'tis  no  slender  piece  of  Wit 
To  act  the  Fool  where  great  Mensit 

But  O,  the  Cap  of  London  Town, 
I  wis,  'tis  like  a  goodly  Crown, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Sickly  Cap  tho'  wrought  with  Silk, 
Is  like  Repentance,  white  as  Milk ; 

When  Caps  drop  off  at  health  a  pace, 
The  Cap  doth  then  your  head  uncase, 

The  sick  man's  Cap,  (if  wrought)  can  tell 
Tho'  he  be  sick,  his  Cap  is  well, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Fudling  Cap  by  Bacchus's  might, 
Turns  Night  to  Day,  and  Day  to  Night ; 

We  know  it  makes  proud  Heads  to  bend, 
The  lowly  Feet  for  to  ascend ; 

It  makes  Men  richer  than  before, 
By  seeing  doubly  all  their  Store, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Furr'd  and  Quilted  Cap  of  age, 
Can  make  a  mouldy  Proverb  sage, 

The  Sattin  and  the  Velvet  hive 
Into  a  Bishoprick  may  thrive ; 

The  Triple  Cap  may  raise  some  hope, 
If  fortune  serve  to  be  a  Pope, 
For  any  Cap,  &c. 

The  Periwig,  O,  this  declares 

The  rise  of  flesh,  tho'  fall  of  hairs, 
And  none  but  Gransirs  can  proceed 

So  far  in  sin  till  they  this  need, 
Before  the  King  who  cover'd  are, 
And  only  to  themselves  stand  bare, 
For  any  Cap,  whatever  it  be, 
Is  still  the  sign  of  some  degree. 


160  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Ballad  of  the  BEARD 

r  I  ""He  Beard  thick  or  thin  on  the  Lip  or  Chin, 

[      Doth  dwell  so  near  the  Tongue, 
That  her  silence  in  the  Beards  defence 

May  do  her  Neighbour  wrong. 

Now  a  Beard  is  a  thing  that  Commands  in  a  King, 

Be  his  Scepters  ne'er  so  fair  : 
Where  the  Beard  bears  the  sway,  the  People  obey, 

And  are  subject  to  a  Hair. 

Tis  a  Princely  sight,  and  a  grave  delight, 

That  adorns  both  young  and  old  ; 
A  well  thatcht  face  is  a  comely  grace, 

And  a  shelter  from  the  Cold. 

When  the  piercing  North  comes  blustering  forth 

Let  a  barren  Face  beware  ; 
For  a  trick  it  will  find,  with  a  Razor  of  wind, 

To  shave  the  Face  that's  bare. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 6 1 

But  there's  many  a  nice  and  strange  device 

That  doth  the  Beard  disgrace, 
But  he  that  is  in  such  a  foolish  sin 

Is  a  Traitor  to  his  Face. 

Now  of  the  Beards  there  be  such  a  company, 

And  fashions  such  a  throng, 
That  it  is  very  hard  to  handle  a  Beard  ; 

Tho'  it  be  ne'er  so  long. 

The  Roman  T,  in  its  bravery, 

Doth  first  it  self  disclose, 
But  so  high  it  turns,  that  oft  it  burns 

With  the  flames  of  a  Torrid  Nose  ! 

The  Stilletto  Beard,  oh  !  it  makes  me  afeard, 

It  is  so  sharp  beneath, 
For  he  that  doth  place  a  Dagger  in's  Face, 

What  wears  he  in  his  Sheath  ? 

But  methinks  I  do  itch  to  go  thro'  stitch 

The  Needle  Beard  to  amend, 
Which  without  any  wrong,  I  may  call  too  long, 

For  a  Man  can  see  no  end. 

The  Soldiers  Beard,  doth  march  in  shear'd  ; 

In  figure  like  a  Spade, 
With  which  he'll  make  his  enemies  quake, 

And  think  tneir  Graves  are  made. 

The  grim  Stubble  eke  on  the  Judges  Cheek 

Shall  not  my  verse  despise  : 
It  is  more  fit  for  a  Nutmeg,  but  yet, 

It  grates  poor  Prisoners  eyes. 

What  doth  invest  a  Bishop's  Breast 

But  a  Milk-white  spreading  hair? 
Which  an  Emblem  may  be  of  Integrity, 

Which  doth  inhabit  there. 

VOL.   IV.  M 


SONGS  Compleat, 

I  have  also  seen  on  a  Woman's  Chin 

A  hair  or  two  to  grow, 
But  alas  the  Face,  it  is  to  cold  a  place ! 

Then  look  for  a  Beard  below. 

But  oh  !  let  us  tarry  for  the  Beard  of  King  Harry 

That  grows  about  the  Chin, 
With  his  bushy  pride,  and  a  grove  on  each  side, 

And  a  Champion  ground  between. 

Last  the  Clown  doth  out  rush,  with  his  Beard  like  a 

Which  may  be  well  endur'd  ; 
For  tho'  his  Face  be  in  such  a  case, 

His  Land  is  well  manur'd. 

The  Tunbridge  Doctors. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  163 

YOU  Maidens  and  Wives, 
And  young  Widows  rejoyce, 
Declare  your  thanksgiving, 

With  Heart  and  with  Voice ; 
Since  Waters  were  Waters 

I  dare  boldly  say, 
There  ne'er  was  such  cause 
Of  a  Thanksgiving  day. 

For  from  London-Town 

There's  lately  come  down, 
Four  Able  Physicians 

That  never  wore  Gown  : 
Their  Physick  is  pleasant, 

Their  Dose  it  is  large, 
And  you  may  be  Cur'd 

Without  Danger  or  Charge. 

No  Bolus  nor  Vomit, 

No  Potion  nor  Pill, 
Which  sometimes  do  Cure, 

But  oftner  do  Kill, 
Your  Taste  nor  your  Stomach 

Need  ever  displease, 
If  you'll  be  advised 

But  by  one  of  these. 

For  they've  a  new  Drug 

Which  is  call'd  the  dose  ffjig, 
Which  will  mend  your  Complexion, 

And  make  you  look  smug, 
A  Sovereign  Balsom 

Which  once  well  apply'd, 
Tho'  griev'd  at  the  Heart 

The  Patient  ne'er  Dy'd. 

In  the  Morning  you  need  not 

Be  robb'd  of  your  rest, 
For  in  your  warm  Beds 

Your  Physick  works  best : 

M  2  And 

1 64  SONGS  Compleat, 

And  tho'  in  the  taking 

Some  stirring's  requir'd, 
The  motion's  so  pleasant 

You  cannot  be  tir'd. 

For  on  your  Backs  you  must  lie, 

With  your  Body  rais'd  high, 
And  one  of  these  Doctors 

Must  always  be  by, 
Who  still  will  be  ready 

To  cover  you  warm, 
For  if  you  take  cold 

All  physick  doth  harm. 

Before  they  do  venture 

To  give  their  direction, 
They  always  consider 

Their  Patients  complexion  ; 
If  she  have  a  moist  Palm 

Or  a  Red  Head  of  Hair, 
She  requires  more  Physick 

Than  one  man  can  spare. 

If  she  have  a  long  Nose, 

The  Doctor  scarce  knows 
How  many  good  handfuls 

Must  go  to  her  Dose  : 
You  Ladies  that  have 

Such  ill  symptoms  as  these, 
In  reason  and  conscience 

Should  pay  double  fees. 

But  that  we  may  give 

To  these  Doctors  due  praise  ; 
Who  to  all  sorts  of  people 

Their  favours  conveys  : 
On  the  ugly  for  pity  sake 

Skill  shall  be  shown, 
And  as  for  the  handsom, 

They're  Cur'd  for  their  own. 


Pleasant  and  Diverttve. 

On  the  Silver  or  Gold 

They  never  lay  hold, 
For  what  comes  so  freely 

They  scorn  should  be  sold  : 
Then  joyn  with  the  Doctors, 

And  heartily  pray, 
Their  power  of  Healing 

May  never  decay. 


A  Ballad  on  New  BETHLEM. 

,    __-      r>     ^ m     i    -•- 


1 66  SONGS  Compleat^ 

THis  is  a  Structure  fair, 
Royally  raised, 
The  pious  Founders  are 
Much  to  be  praised ; 

That  in  such  times  of  need, 
When  Madness  doth  exceed, 
To  build  this  House  of  Bread 
Noble  New-Bedlam* 

'Tis  beautiful  and  large 

In  constitution, 
Deserves  a  Liberal  Charge 
Of  contribution, 
If  I  may  reach  so  high, 
To  sing  a  Prophecy, 
Their  Names  shall  never  die 
That  built  New- Bedlam. 

Methinks  the  Lawyers  may 

Consult  together, 
And  Contribute,  for  they 
Send  most  Men  thither ; 
They  put  'em  to  much  pain, 
With  Words  that  cramp  the  Brain, 
Till  Bedlam's  fill'd  with  Plain 
tiff  and  Defendant. 

Quacking  Physicians  shou'd 

Give  Money  freely, 
They  maculate  Mens  Blood, 
And  make  them  silly  ; 

With  Hydragargyrum  Pills, 
Their  Reasons  and  their  Wills 
They  mine,  and  this  fills 
Most  part  of  Bedlam. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  1 6  7 

So  good  a  Work  as  this 
Cannot  want  Actors, 
But  I'll  no  more  insist 
On  Benefactors, 

But  hint  such  as  I  see 
Hypocondriack  be, 
And  are  in  some  degree 
Fit  for  New-Bedlam. 

That  Amorous  Soul  that  is    - 

In  Love  a  Quaker, 
And  doth  adore  a  Miss 
More  than  his  Maker,.  • 
Decks  her  in  Silk  and  Furr, 
Then  turns  Idolater, 
Kneels  down  and  Worships  her, 
He's  fit  for  Bedlam. 

The  young  Man  that  has  got 

A  golden  Talent ; 
And  hath  a  brain-sick  Plot 
To  seem  a  Gallant ; 
That  richly  is  array'd, 
Spends  Land,  and  Shop,  and  Trade, 
To  be  a  Hector  made ; 
Is  fit  for  Bedlam. 

The  City-Lad  that  sings, 

Rhimes,  Drolls  and  Dances, 
And  all  his  business  flings 
Away  for  Fancies ; 

He  that  lets  his  Angels  fly, 
Till  he's  not  worth  one  Penny, 
To  Study  Poetry, 
Is  fit  for  Bedlam. 


1 68  SONGS   Compleat, 

Whilst  some  with  Brandy  burn 

Their  Guts  with  drinking, 
Philosophers  do  turn 

Their  Heads  with  thinking  ; 
He  who  is  such  a  one, 
As  studies  for  the  Stone, 
Till's  Brain  and  his  Money's  gone, 
Prepares  for  Bedlam. 

That  Churl  who  Gold  hath  won, 

And  dares  not  use  it, 
But  hath  a  squandring  Son 
Doth  Game  and  lose  it : 
His  Brain  doth  greatly  err, 
He  that  with  Water  clear 
Would  fill  a  Colander, 
Must  do't  in  Bedlam. 

He  that  with  an  Estate 
Weds  a  poor  Beauty, 
Who  to  Disdain  and  Hate, 
Turns  Love  and  Duty  ; 
It  doth  his  Reason  daunt 
He  has  a  Bargain  on't, 
Whose  then  the  Elephant, 
And's  fit  for  Bedlam. 

I  could  tell  many  more; 
(I  have  enroll'd  'em) 
Sould  I  declare  my  store, 
As  I  have  told  'em  ; 

With  Mortar,  Brick  and  Stone, 
Could  they  their  Building  run 
From  thence  to  Islington, 
'Twoiild  never  hold  'em. 


Pleasant  and  Diverlive. 


An  Ancient  SONG  #/ Bartholomew- Fair. 

IN  Fifty  five,  may  I  never  Thrive, 
If  I  tell  you  any  more  than  is  true  ; 
To  London  che  came,  hearing  of  the  Fame 
Of  a  Fair  they  call  Bartholomew. 

In  Houses  of  Boards,  Men  walk  upon  Cords, 
As  easie  as  Squirrels  crack  Filberds ; 

But  the  Cut-purses  they  do  Bite  and  rub  away, 
But  those  we  suppose  to  be  Ill-Birds. 

For  a  Penny  you  may  zee  a  fine  Puppet-play, 
And  for  Two-pence  a  rare  piece  of  Art ; 

And  a  Penny  a  Cann,  I  dare  swear  a  Man, 
May  put  zix  of  'em  into  a  Quart. 

Their  Zights  are  so  rich,  is  able  to  bewitch 

The  Heart  of  a  very  fine  Man  a  ; 
Here's  Patient  Grisel  here,  and  Fair  Rosamond  there, 

And  the  History  of  Susanna. 


1 70  SONGS  Compleat, 

At  Pye-corner  end,  mark  well  my  good  Friend, 

'Tis  a  very  fine  dirty  place  ; 

Where  there's  more  Arrows  and  Bows,  the  Lord  above 

Then  was  handl'd  at  Chivy-Chase. 

At  every  Door  lies  a  Hag,  or  a  Whore, 
And  in  Hosier-Lane,  if  I  a'n't  mistaken  ; 

Zuch  plenty  there  are  of  Whores,  you'll  have  a  pair, 
To  a  zingle  Gamon  of  Bacon. 

Then  at  Smithfield-Bars,  betwixt  the  Ground  and  the 

There's  a  place  they  call  Shoemaker-Row ; 
Where  that  you  may  buy  Shoes  every  day, 

Or  go  bare-foot  all  the  Year  I  tro. 

TWO  /00NE. 

FF— E— fed — =^—- F D_^_L_KZ C 

Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  1 7 1 

THere  were  two  Bumpkins  lov'd  a  Lass, 
And  striving  who  should  have  her  ; 
She  presum'd  of  what  she  had, 
And  they  of  what  they  gave  her : 
Hey  ho,  hey  ho,  my  Heart's  delight, 
Carouse  away  all  Sorrow  ; 

Let  me  Tickle  thy  Wench  twice  to  Night,  to  Night, 
She  shall  be  thine  to  Morrow. 

But  we  were  both  of  one  Consent, 
And  something  had  some  Savour ; 

And  let  a  poor  Man  be  content 
With  half  a  Wenches  Favour  : 
Hey  ho,  &c. 

But  this  is  still  against  all  Sence, 

Which  ever  more  hath  vex'd  us ; 
That  ev'ry  Lobcock  hath  his  Wench, 

And  we  but  one  betwixt  us. 
Hey  ho,  &c. 

Good  Brother,  let  us  not  dismay, 

What  hap  so  e'er  betide  us  ; 
For  fear  a  Third  should  come  this  way, 

And  pull  our  Wench  beside  us  : 
Hey  ho,  &c. 

For  Women  they  are  Winning  things, 

As  mutable  as  may  be  ; 
No  Bird  that  ever  flew  with  Wings, 
So  subtile  is  as  they  be. 

Hey  ho,  hey  ho,  my  Hearfs  delight, 
Carouse  away  all  Sorrow, 

Let  me  Tickle  thy  Wench  twice  to  Night,  to  Night, 
She  shall  be  thine  to  Morrow. 

SONGS  Compleat, 

No  matter  who  shall  pledge  her  first, 

Affections  are  but  blindness ; 
And  let  the  World  say  what  they  list, 
We'll  take  her  double  Kindness. 
Hey  ho,  hey  ho,  my  HearCs  delight, 
Carouse  away  all  Sorrow  ; 

Let  me  Tickle  thy  Wench  twice  to  Night,  to  Night, 
She  shall  be  thine  to  Morrow. 

For  she  hath  granted  both  our  Sutes, 

When  we  came  first  unto  her ; 
And  he  shall  Ride  in  both  our  Boots, 

That  comes  the  next  to  Wooe  her  : 
Hey  ho,  &c. 


By  Mr.  BUTLER,  Author  of  HUDIBRAS. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 73 

WHAT  Creature's  that  with  his  short  Hairs, 
His  little  Band,  and  huge  long  Ears, 
That  this  new  Faith  hath  founded  ? 
The  Saints  themselves  were  never  such, 
The  Prelates  ne'er  rul'd  half  so  much, 
O  such  a  Rogue's  a  Round-head. 

What's  he  that  doth  the  Bishops  hate, 
And  counts  their  Calling  Reprobate, 

Cause  by  the  Pope  Propounded ; 
And  thinks  a  Zealous  Cobler  better, 
Than  learned  Usher  in  every  Letter, 

O  such  a  Rogues  a  Round-head. 

What's  he,  that  doth  High-Treason  say, 
As  often  as  his  Yea  and  Nay, 

And  wish  the  King  confounded  ; 
And  dares  maintain  that  Mr.  Pirn, 
Is  fitter  for  the  Crown  than  him, 

O  such  a  Rogue's  a  Round-head. 

What's  he,  that  if  he  chance  to  hear 
A  little  piece  of  Common-Prayer, 

Doth  think  his  Conscience  wounded  ; 
Will  go  five  Miles  to  Preach  and  Pray, 
And  meet  a  Sister  by  the  way, 

O  such  a  Rogue's  a  Round-head. 

What's  he  that  met  a  Holy  Sister, 
And  in  a  Hay-cock  gently  Kiss'd  her  ? 

O  then  his  Zeal  abounded ; 
'Twas  underneath  a  shady  Willow, 
Her  Bible  serv'd  her  for  a  Pillow, 

And  there  he  got  a  Round-head. 


1 74  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  OXFORD  Expedition. 
Tune  of,  Which  no  Body  can  deny. 

A     Late  Expedition  to  Oxford  was  made 
/\    By  a  Protestant  P.  and  his  Brothers  o'th'  Blade. 
Who  from  Gloucester  in  Triumph  his  Lordship  convey'd, 
WJiich  no  Body  can  deny,  deny ;  which  no  Body  can 

Had  you  seen  all  his  Myrmidons  when  they  came  to  us, 
Equipp'd  in  their  sturdy  grey  Coats  and  high  Shoes, 
You'd  have  sworn  not  the  Goals,  but  all  Hell  was  broke 

Which  no  Body,  &c. 

In  Rank  and  in  File  there  rode  many  a  Man, 
Some  in  the  Rear  March'd,  and  some  in  the  Van, 
Tho'  some  had  no  Hats,  yet  they  had  Head-pieces  on, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Some  had  two  lusty  Legs,  but  never  a  Boot, 
And  on  their  Tits  mounted,  they  stood  stoutly  to't, 
For  the  name  of  a  Horse,  they'd  as  good  gone  a  Foot, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Tho'  Steel  was  not  plenty,  yet  Armed  they  come, 
With  stout  Oaken  Plants,  and  with  Crab-tree  stick  some, 
To  Cudgel  the  Pope  and  the  Bald-pates  of  Rome, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

For  in  these  gay  Troops  among  twenty,  scarce  one 
Had  Holsters  or  Pistols,  Sword,  Carbine  or  Gun, 
A  sign  they  did  mean  no  great  Harm  should  be  done, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Here  many  a  Gallant  I'll  warrant  you  that 
Had  Ribband  of  Orange  and  Seaman's  Cravat, 
The  defects  of  their  Arms,  were  made  up  in  State, 
Which  no  Body  can  deny,  &c. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  1 75 

One's  Horse  wore  a  Halter  among  all  the  rest, 
Nor  had  the  dull  Wight  half  the  Sence  of  his  Beast, 
And  he  of  the  two,  deserv'd  the  Rope  best, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Here  M- — t  and  G — on  their  pamper' d  Steeds  prance, 

Jack  B —  Grace,  next  Jack  Willis  advance, 

Who  look'd   fierce   as   Switzer,  who  drub'd  him  in 

Which  no  Body,  &c. 

In  this  Cavalcade  for  the  Grace  of  the  Matter, 
Lord  L —  rod  first,  and  the  rest  follow'd  after, 
They  gallop'd  up  Town,  and  then  down  to  the  Water, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

The  Mayor  and  his  Brethren  in  courteous  fashion, 
Bid  him  welcome  to  Town  in  a  fine  penn'd  Oration, 
And  thank'd  him  for  taking  such  care  of  the  Nation, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

His  Honour  next  day  in  Courtship  exceeding, 
Return'd  a  smart  Speech,  to  shew  'em  his  Breeding, 
Which   when  'tis  in  Print,  'twill  be  well  worth  your 

Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Having  taken  it  thus,  to  secure  the  Town, 
The  Guards  are  all  set,  and  the  Bridges  pull'd  down, 
And  tho'  little  Courage,  his  Conduct  was  shown, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Next  Night  an  Alarm  our  Warriors  surprise, 
Drums  beat,  Trumpets  sound,  and  at  Midnight  all  rise, 
To  Fight  the  King's  Army,  who  came  in  disguise, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Next  Morning  at  Eight,  his  Lordship  did  call, 
And  ask'd  if  they'd  got  any  Powder  or  Ball, 
But  they  Manfully  answer'd,  they  had  none  at  all, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 



SONGS  Compleaty 

Among  the  Crowd,  two  fat  Draymen  appear, 
To  guard  Mr.  Ensign,  a  huge  nasty  Tar, 
Who  flourish'd  a  Blanket  for  Colours  of  War, 
Which  no  Body  can  deny. 

At  foot  of  the  Colours,  blith  Crendon  did  go, 
Who  play'd  a  new  Tune,  which  you  very  well  know, 
For  his  Bag-pipes  squeak'd  nothing  but  Lero,  Lero, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Ah  !  had  the  dear  Joys  but  come  in  the  nick, 
I  fancy  they'd  show'd  'em  a  slippery  Trick, 
For  they'd  March'd  more  nimbly  without  his  Musick, 
Which  no  Body,  &c. 

Since  England  was  England,  no  People  e'er  scarce, 
So  Pleasantly  Burlesqu'd  the  angry  God  Mars, 
Or  of  Affairs  Warlike,  e'er  made  such  a  Farce, 

Which  no  Body  can  deny,  deny ;  which  no  Body  can 

The  FRYER  and  the  NUN. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  177 

1  ^LY  merry  News  among  the  Crews, 
,     )        That  love  to  hear  of  Jests  ; 
The  oldest  Sport  that  e'er  was  us'd, 

Yet  chiefly  in  request : 
If  any  one  do  carp  at  thee, 

Or  do  thee  Bawdy  call ; 
Say  thou  do'st  write  as  they  delight, 
Of  Up-tails  all. 

There  hath  a  Question  been  of  late, 

Among  the  Youthful  sort ; 
What  Pastime  is  the  pleasantest, 

And  what  the  sweetest  Sport  ? 
And  it  hath  been  adjudged 

As  well  by  great  as  small, 
That  of  all  Pastimes  none  is  like 

To  Up-tails  all. 

Batchelors  will  to  this  Game, 

And  Marry'd  Men  likewise  ; 
Yea,  Wives,  yea  Maids,  and  Widows, 

Will  use  it  all  their  Lives  : 
And  old  Men  they  will  have  a  snatch, 

Altho'  their  Game's  but  small ; 
Yet  these  old  Colts  will  have  a  Bout 

At  Up-tails  all. 

If  it  were  Unlawful, 

Then  Lawyers  were  to  blame  : 
And  if  it  were  Ungodly, 

To  Priests  it  were  a  shame  : 
For  they  no  doubt  do  use  it, 

Tho'  it  a  Vice  they  call ; 
Yet  Priests  and  Lawyers  both  will  play 

At  Up-tails  all. 
VOL.  iv.  N 

178  SONGS  Compleat, 

It  cannot  be  Unwholsome, 

Physicians  do  it  use  ; 
And  if  that  it  were  Noysome, 

They  would  it  then  refuse  : 
And  if  it  hurt  the  Body, 

Then  sure  their  Skill  is  small ; 
For  why  the  best  of  these  will  play, 

At  Up-tails  all. 

Ladies  love  the  Pastime, 

And  do  the  Pleasure  crave, 
And  if  it  were  a  base  thing, 

Then  it  they  would  not  have  : 
But  yet  the  Fairest  Women, 

Will  soonest  for  it  call ; 
There  is  no  she  but  that  will  play, 

At  Up-tails  all. 

If  it  were  a  costly  thing, 

Then  Beggars  could  not  buy  it ; 
And  if  it  were  a  Loathsom  thing, 

Then  Genteels  would  dene  it : 
But  it  is  a  sweet  thing, 

And  pleasing  unto  all ; 
There  is  not  one  but  that  will  play 

At  Up-tails  all. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



AS  I  came  from  Tottingham 
Upon  a  Market-day, 
There  I  met  with  a  bonny  Lass 

Cloathed  all  in  Gray, 
Her  Journey  was  to  London, 

With  Butter-milk  and  Whey. 
To  come  Down  a  down, 
To  come  Down,  down  a  down  a. 

Sweet-heart  quoth  he, 

You're  well  overtook, 
With  that  she  cast  her  Head  aside, 

And  lent  to  him  a  Look  ; 
Then  presently  these  two 

Both  Hands  together  shook  : 
To  come,  &c. 

And  as  they  rode  together, 

A  long  side  by  side, 
The  Maiden  it  so  chanced, 

Her  Garter  was  unty'd  ; 

N    2 


1 80  SONGS  Compleat, 

For  fear  that  she  should  lose  it, 

Look  here,  Sweet-heart,  he  cr/d, 
Your  Garter  is  down  a  down,  &c. 
Good  Sir,  quoth  she, 

I  pray  you  take  the  Pain, 
To  do  so  much  for  me. 

As  to  take  it  up  again, 
With  a  good  will,  quoth  he, 

When  I  come  to  yonder  Plain, 
I  will  take  you  down,  &c. 
And  when  they  came  unto  the  Place. 

Upon  the  Grass  so  green, 
The  Maid  she  held  her  Legs  so  wide, 

The  Young  man  slipt  between, 
Such  tying  of  a  Garter, 

You  have  but  seldom  seen. 
To  come  down,  &c. 
Then  she  rose  up  again, 

And  thank'd  him  for  his  pain : 
He  took  her  by  the  middle  small, 

And  Kiss'd  her  once  again  : 
Her  Journey  was  to  London, 

And  he  from  Highgate  came, 
To  come  down,  &c. 
Thus  Tibb  of  Tottingham, 

She  lost  her  Maiden-head, 
But  yet  it  is  no  matter, 

It  stood  her  in  small  stead, 
For  it  did  often  trouble  her, 

As  she  lay  in  her  Bed. 
To  come  down,  &c. 
But  when  all  her  Butter-milk 

And  her  Whey  was  sold, 
The  loss  of  her  Maiden-head, 

It  waxed  very  cold  : 
But  that  which  will  away, 

Is  very  hard  to  hold. 
To  come,  &c. 


Pleasant  and.  Divertive. 

You  Maids,  you  Wives,  and  Widows, 
That  now  do  hear  my  Song, 

If  any  young  man  proffer  Kindness, 
Pray  take  it  short,  or  long  ; 

For  there  is  no  such  Comfort 
As  lying  with  a  Man. 

To  come  Down  a  down, 

Jo  come  Down,  down  a  down  a. 


A    BALLAD  of  a  Good  Wife  and  a  Bad. 


SOme  Wives  are  Good,  and  some  are  Bad, 
[Reply.]  Methinks  you  touch  them  now, 
And  some  will  make  their  Husbands  mad, 
[Cho.]     And  so  wilt  my  Wife  too  : 

And  my  Wife,  and  thy  Wife, 
And  my  Wife  so  will  do. 


1 82  SONGS  Compleat, 

Some  Women  love  to  breed  Discord, 

Methinks,  &c. 

And  some  will  have  the  latter  Word, 
[Cho.J  And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  will  Spin,  and  some  will  Sow, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  to  the  Tavern  go, 

And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  will  say,  they're  sick  at  Heart, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  let  a  rousing  Fart, 

And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  will  ban,  and  some  will  Curse, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  pick  their  Husbands  Purse, 

And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  will  Brawl,  and  some  will  Scold, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  make  their  Husbands  Cuckolds, 

And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  will  Drink  and  some  will  not, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  take  the  other  Pot, 

And  so,  &c. 

Some  Women  are  sick  and  some  are  sound, 

Methinks,  &c. 
And  some  will  take  it  on  the  Ground, 

And  so,  &c. 

Thus  of  my  Song  I'll  make  an  end, 

Methinks,  &c. 

Hoping  all  Women  will  amend, 
[Cho.]     And  so  will  my  Wife  too  : 

And  my  Wife,  and  thy  Wife, 
And  my  Wife  so  will  do. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

A  SONG  in  Praise  of  'Chalk.    J3yW.  Pittis. 


Hile  the  Citizens  prate 

Over  Ale  of  the  State, 
And  talk  of  Bank-Bills  and  Exchequer, 
Let  us,  who  drink  Wine, 
Now  summon  the  Nine^ 
In  the  Praise  of  what  pays  for  our  Liquor : 


184  SONGS  Compleat, 

Let  other  Folks  sing, 

Of  a  Lord,  or  a  King 
Or  some  Quality  Fopling  Petition, 

Till  Footman  comes  down, 

With  thanks,  or  a  Crown, 
And  smiles  at  the  Mortal's  Condition. 

We  the  Lads  at  the  Rose, 

A  Patron  have  chose, 
Who's  as  void  as  the  best  is  of  Thinking, 

And  without  Dedication, 

Will  assist  in  his  Station, 
And  maintain  us  in  Eating  and  Drinking. 

Boys  out  with  your  Chalk, 

And  let  the  Glass  walk, 
'Tis  a  crying  Sin  not  to  be  grateful, 

While  there's  Pit  of  this  Coin, 

We  will  swim  all  in  Wine, 
And  reel  home  to  our  Beds,  with  our  Pate  full. 

Tho'  Relation  or  Friend 

Will  not  Give  us  or  Lend, 
Wherewithal  for  to  down  with  the  Ready  j 

Yet  our  good  Landlord -Bliss, 

Makes  acceptance  of  this, 
And  this  Boys  must  Cloath  ye,  and  Feed  ye. 

With  the  White  then  in  hand, 

The  Red  let's  command, 
And  keep  drinking  and  scoring  brisk  Claret^ 

Till  the  Bar  runs  on  Wheels, 

And  Will  takes  to  his  Heels, 
And  sculks  home  from  the  Watch,  to  his  Garret 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  185 

Caelia's  Rundlet  of  Brandy.    By  T.  Brown. 



Charming  O/^V  Arms  I  flew, 
And  there  all  Night  I  feasted, 
No  God  such  Transport  ever  knew, 
Or  Mortal  ever  tasted. 


1 86  SONGS  Compleat, 

Lost  in  the  sweet  tumultuous  Joy, 
And  bless'd  beyond  Expressing, 

How  can  your  Slave,  my  Fair,  said  I, 
Reward  so  great  a  Blessing  ? 

The  whole  Creation's  Wealth  survey, 
O'er  both  the  Indies  wander, 

Ask  what  brib'd  Senates  give  away, 
And  Fighting  Monarchs  squander. 

The  richest  Spoils  of  Earth  and  Air, 
The  rifled  Ocean's  Treasure, 

'Tis  all  too  poor  a  Bribe  by  far, 
To  purchase  so  much  Pleasure. 

She  blushing  cry'd,  my  Life,  my  Dear, 
Since  Ceelia  thus  you  Fancy, 

Give  her,  but  'tis  too  much,  I  fear, 
A  Rundlet  of  right  Nantzy. 

Cousin  TAFFEY. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  1 8  7 

_u_X_      _JS , £_JL_ 


kHere  was  a  Man,  a  Shentleman, 

And  hur  was  porn,  where  twas  twell, 
In  truth,  hur  was  a  gallant  Man, 

As  all  hur  Country  Folk  can  tell : 
Was  a  great  deal  of  House,  was  a  great  deal  of  Land, 

Taffy,  Taffy,  Taffy: 

Was  Hawk,  was  Hound  at  her  Command, 
Cousin  Taffy,  Taffy. 

Hur  Mother  was  porn  of  Noble  Flood, 

And  hur  was  come  of  a  great  pig  House, 
And  every  day  was  wear  French  Hood, 
Was  kill  her  Capon,  Pig,  and  Coose, 
And  every  day  was  make  great  Pye,  Taffy,  Taffy, 
In  truth  it  is  true,  I  tell  you  no  Lie,  Cousin  Taffy. 

And  to  the  Poor  hur  did  bequeath, 

A  great  deal  of  Victuals  every  day ; 
But  there  was  one  was  call  her  Death, 

Was  fetch  this  Shentleman  away  : 
Of  House,  of  Land  hur  was  berefen  Taffy,  Taffy : 
Now  hur  was  forc'd  to  twell  in  Heaven,  Cousin  Taffy. 


i88  SONGS  Compleat, 

Behind  hur  hur  was  leaf  a  Son, 

And  hur  was  pear  a  gallant  Mind  ; 
Was  kill  twey  Spaniards  with,  a  Gun, 

Hur  was  not  of  a  Coward  kind  : 
At  Killberry  Camp,  a  great  deal  afore,  Taffy,  Taffy, 
O  hur  was  there,  and  a  Thousand  more,  Cousin  Taffy. 

Bowoyne  hur  was  at  Tellenton, 

At  Greenwich  Park  before  hur  Grace, 
Was  shew  hur  self  a  gallant  Man, 

And  not  a  Coward  in  the  place  : 
Was  a  great  deal  of  Horse,  was  a  great  deal  of  Foak, 

Taffy,  Taffy 

Was  a  great  deal  of  Gun,  was;  a  great  deal  of  Smoak, 
Cousin  Taffy. 

But  her  was  meet  with  a  great  Mischance, 

As  hur  vyas  pass  a  gay  Lady  by, 
Sir  Cupid  prick  hur  with  a  Lance, 
Was  steal  behind  hur  Cowardly, 
With  a  rousty,  fousty,  dousty  Dart,  Taffy,  Taffy, 
Was  miss  hur  Skin,  was  prick  her  Heart,  Cousin  Taffy. 

But  was  not  this  a  great  Mischance, 
As  by  hur  Fortune  does  appear  ? 
Sir  Cupid  prick  her  with  a  Lance, 

Was  almost  Dead,  was  ferry  near : 
Was  bid  Tom  Sexton  Toll  the  Bell,  Taffy,  Taffy, 
Shudge  you  if  Cupid  us'd  her  well,  Cousin  Taffy. 

Well  a  go  to,  was  hold  hur  a  Groat, 

Was  petter  a  gone  and  kill  hur  Geese, 
Hur  would  not  be  in  Cupid's  Coat, 

Not  for  a  great  deal  of  Toasted-Cheese, 
For  if  ever  Cupid  come  in  Wales,  Taffy,  Taffy, 
Hur  shall  ne'er  go  to  make  more  Prauls,  Cousin  Taffy. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive. 


To  find  out  TOM  <?/"  BEDLAM. 

TO  find  my  70;«  of  Bedlam  Ten  Thousand  Years 
I'll  Travel, 
Mad  Maudlin  goes  with  dirty  Toes  to  save  her  Shoes 

from  Gravel. 
Yet  will  I  sing  Bonny  Boys,  bonny  Mad  Boys,  Bedlam 

Boys  are  Bonny  ; 

They  still  go  bare  and  live  by  the  Air,  and  want  no 
Drink,  nor  Money. 

I  now  repent  that  ever  poor  Tom  was  so  disdain'd, 
My  Wits  are  lost  since  him  I  crost,  which  makes  me 

go  thus  Chain'd : 
Yet  will  I  sing,  &c. 

My  Staff  hath  Murder'd  Gyants,  my  Bag  a  long  Knife 

To  cut  Mince-pyes  from  Children's  Thighs,  with  which 

I  feast  the  Varies  : 
Yet  I  will  sing,  &c. 

My  Horn  is  made  of  Thunder,  I  stole  it  out  of  Heav'n, 
The  Rain-bow  there  is  this  I  wear,  for  which  I  thence 

was  driv'n  : 
Yet  will  I  sing,  &c. 


1 90  SONGS  Compleat, 

I   went  to  Pluto's  Kitchin,  to  beg  some  Food  one 

And  there  I  got  Souls  piping  hot,  with  which  the  Spits 

were  turning : 
Yet  will  I  sins;  Bonny  Boys,  bonny  Maa  Boys,  Bedlam 

Boys  are  Bonny  ; 
They  still  go  bare  and  live  by  the  Air,  and  want  no 

Drink,  nor  Money. 

Then  took  I  up  a  Cauldron  where  boyl'd  Ten  Thou 
sand  Harlots, 

'Twas  full  of  Flame,  yet  I  drank  the  same  to  the  health 
of  all  such  Varlets. 

Yet  ivill  I,  &c. 

A  Spirit  as  hot  as  Lightning,  did  in  that  Journey  guide 

The  Sun  did  shake,  and  the  pale  Moon  quake,  as  soon 

as  e'er  they  spi'd  me  : 
Yet  will  1,  &c. 

And  now  that  I  have  gotten  a  Lease,  than  Dooms-day 

To  live  on  Earth  with  some  in  Mirth,  ten  Whales  shall 

feed  my  Hunger : 
Yet  will  I,  &c. 

No  Gipsie,  Slut,  or  Doxy,  shall  win  my  mad  Tom  from 

We'll  weep  all  Night,  and  with  Stars  fight,  the  Fray 

will  well  become  me  : 
Yet  will  /,  &c. 

And  when  that  I  have  beaten  the  Man  i'th'  Moon  to 

His   Dog  I'll  take,  and  him  I'll  make  as  could  no 

Damon  louder : 
Yet  will  /,  &c. 

A  Health  to  Tom  of  Bedlam,  go  fill  the  Seas  in  Barrels, 
I'll  drink  it  all,  well  Brew'd  with  Gall,  and  Maudling- 

Drunk,  I'll  Quarrel  : 
Yet  will  7,  &c.  John 

Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  191 

JOHN    and  JOAN. 


192  SONGS  Compleat, 

TF't  please  you  for  to  hear, 
And  listen  a  while  what  I  shall  tell ; 
I  think  I  must  draw  near, 

Or  else  you  won't  hear  me  well : 
There  was  a  Maid  the  other  Day, 
Which  in  her  Master's  Chamber  lay  ; 
As  Maidens  they  must  not  refuse, 
In  Yeomens  Houses  thus  they  use 
In  a  Truckle-bed  to  lye, 
Or  another  standing  by  : 
Her  Master  and  her  Dame, 
Said  she  shou'd  do  the  same. 

This  Maid  cou'd  neither  rest  nor  Sleep, 
When  that  she  heard  the  Bed  to  crack ; 

Her  Master  Captive  busie  was, 

Her  Dame  cry'd  out,  you  hurt  my  Back  : 

Oh  Husband  you  do  me  wrong, 

You've  lain  so  hard  my  Breast  upon ; 

You  are  such  another  Man, 

You'd  have  me  do  more  than  I  can  : 

Tush  Master,  then  says  Joan, 

Pray  let  my  Dame  alone  ; 

What  a  devilish  Squalling  you  keep, 

That  I  can  neither  rest  nor  Sleep. 

This  was  enough  to  make  a  Maiden  sick 

And  full  of  Pain  ; 
She  begins  to  Fling  and  Kick, 

And  swore  she'd  rent  her  Smock  in  twain  : 
But  you  shall  hear  anon, 
There  was  a  Man  his  Name  was  John, 
To  whom  this  Maid  she  went  alone, 
And  in  this  manner  made  her  moan  ; 
I  prithee  John  tell  me  no  Lie, 
What  ails  my  Dame  to  Squeak  and  Cry  ? 
I  prithee  John  tell  me  the  same, 
What  is't  my  Master  gives  my  Dame  ? 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  193 

It  is  a  Steel,  quoth  John, 

My  Master  gives  my  Dame  at  Night : 
Altho'  some  fault  she  find, 

I'm  sure  it  is  her  Heart's  Delight : 
And  you  Joan  for  your  part, 
You  love  one  withal  your  Heart : 
Yes,  marry  then  quoth  Joan, 
Therefore  to  you  i  make  my  moan  ; 
If  that  I  may  be  so  bold, 
Where  are  these  things  to  be  sold  ? 
At  London  then  said  John, 
Next  Market  day  I'll  bring  thee  one. 

What  will  a  good  one  cost, 

If  I  shou'd  chance  to  stand  in  need  ? 
Twenty  Shillings,  says  John, 

And  for  Twenty  Shillings  you  may  speed : 
Then  Joan  she  ran  unto  her  Chest, 
And  fetch'd  him  Twenty  Shillings  just ; 
John,  said  she,  here  is  your  Coin, 
And  I  pray  you  have  me  in  your  Mind  : 
And  out  of  my  Love  therefore, 
There  is  for  you  two  Shillings  more ; 
And  I  pray  thee  honest  John  Long, 
Buy  me  one  that's  Stiff  and  Strong. 

To  Market  then  he  went, 

When  he  had  the  Money  in  his  Purse ; 
He  domineer'd  and  vapour'd, 

He  was  as  stout  as  any  Horse  : 
Some  he  spent  in  Ale  and  Beer, 
And  some  he  spent  upon  good  Cheer ; 
The  rest  he  brought  home  again, 
To  serve  his  turn  another  time  : 
Welcome  home  honest  John, 
God  a  mercy  gentle  Joan; 
Prithee  John  let  me  feel, 
Hast  thou  brought  me  home  a  Steel. 
VOL.  iv.  o  Yes, 

194  SONGS  Compleat, 

Yes,  marry  then  quoth  John, 

And  then  he  took  her  by  the  Hand  ; 

He  led  her  into  a  Room, 

Where  they  cou'd  see  neither  Sun  nor  Moon 

Together  John  the  Door  did  clap, 

He  laid  the  Steel  into  her  Lap : 

With  that  Joan  began  to  feel, 

Cuts  Foot,  quoth  she,  'tis  a  dainty  Steel : 

I  prithee  tell  me,  and  do  not  lye, 

What  are  the  two  Things  hang  thereby? 

They  be  the  two  odd  Shillings,  quoth  John, 

That  you  put  last  into  my  Hand  : 

If  I  had  known  so  much  before, 

I  wou'd  have  giv'n  thee  two  Shillings  more. 

A   SONG. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  tive.  1 9  5 

A  Lusty  young  Smith  at  his  Vice  stood  a  Filing, 
Rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub  in  and  out,  in  and 
out  ho  ; 

When  to  him  a  Buxom  young  Damsel  came  smiling, 
And  ask'd  if  to  Work  at  her  Forge  he  wou'd  go  : 

With  a  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub  in  and  out,  in  and 

out  ho : 

A  match  quoth  the  Smith,  so  away  they  went  thither, 
Rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub,  rub  in  and  out,  in  and  out  ho  ; 
They  strip'd   to   go   to't,  'twas   hot   Work   and   hot 


She  kindl'd  a  Fire,  and  soon  made  him  blow ; 
With  a  Rub,  rub,  &c. 

Her  Husband  she  said  could  scarce  raise  up  his  Ham 

His  strength  and  his  Tools  were  worn  out  long  ago  ; 
If  she  got  her  Journey-men,  could  any  blame  her, 
Look  here  quoth  our  Workman,  my  Tools  are  not  so  : 
With  a  Rub,  rub,  &c. 

Red-hot  grew  his  Iron  as  both  did  desire, 
And  he  was  too  wise  not  to  strike  while  'twas  so ; 
Quoth  she,  what  I  get,  I  get  out  of  the  Fire, 
Then  prithee  strike  home  and  redouble  the  blow  : 
With  a  Rub,  rub,  &c. 

Six  times  did  his  Iron  by  vigorous  heating, 
Grow  soft  in  the  Forge  in  a  Minute  or  so ; 
As  often  'twas  harden'd,  still  beating  and  beating, 
But  the  more  it  was  soften'd  it  harden'd  more  slow  : 
With  a  Rub,  rub,  &c. 

The  Smith  then  wou'd  go,  quoth  the  Dame  full  of 


Oh  what  wou'd  I  give,  cou'd  my  Cuckold  do  so  ! 
Good  Lad  with  your  Hammer  come  hither  to  Morrow, 
But  pray  can't  you  use  it  once  more  e'er  you  go  : 
With  a  Rub,  rub,  £c. 

o  2  The 

196  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Country  WAKE. 

_£:_-£_  9-*—,- n 

T  N  our  Country,  and  in  your  Country, 
J_      Where  Rufflers  they  were  a  raking 
The  rarest  Pastime  that  ever  you  see, 

Was  when  Hay-cocks  they  were  a  making. 

Timmy  and  Tom,  with  Bottle  and  Bag, 

So  merrily  they  were  a  quaffing  ; 
If  you'd  but  zeen  how  Joan's  Buttocks  did  wag. 

You'd  burst  your  Heart  with  Laughing. 

On  another  Hay-cock  was  Vulcan  the  Smith, 
With  Dolly  that  came  from  the  Dairy ; 

She  thought  that  his  Back  was  so  full  of  Pith, 
Which  made  her  so  willing  to  tarry. 

Then  rustling  Joan  came  brustling  in, 
And  said  you  are  vull  of  your  Froliks ; 

If  you  will  not  let  black  Maggy  alone, 

Beshre  tv  she  will  take  you  by  th'  Bald-Pate. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  1 9  7 

Then  Satchel-arse  Ctss,  she  went  to  P 

And  they  went  home  to  conduct  her  ; 
And  all  the  way  after  they  did  Kiss, 

And  all  the  way  homeward  they  pluckt  her. 

Then  down  in  a  Dale  was  tumble-down  Dick, 
The  Wenches  they  caught  him  and  held  him  ; 

Because  he  could  not  give  'em  the  Thing  they  did  lack 
Poor  Fellow,  they  threaten'd  to  Geld  him. 

Then  did  you  not  hear  of  a  Country  Trick  ? 

They  say  that  Tuskirfs  no  Dastard ; 
For  when  Country  Gillians  do  play  with  their  Dicks, 

Then  London  must  Father  their  Bastards. 

Ttie  Chorus  to  be  Humour' d  by  the  Hands  and  Elbows, 
as  the  Souldier  and  the  Sailor. 

The  DEVIL  and  the  COLLIER. 

-±-     r   T        ~ n 1 1 '   ~i — • — r    m M~i" 

198  SONGS  Compleat, 

THE  Devil  he  was  so  Weather-beat, 
He  was  forc'd  to  take  to  a  Tree, 
Because  the  Tempest  was  so  great, 

his  way  he  could  not  see  : 
Then  under  an  Oak,  instead  of  a  Cloak, 

he  stood  to  keep  himself  dry, 
There  as  he  stood,  a  Fryer  in  his  Hood 
by  chance  came  walking  by. 

The  next  that  came  by,  was  a  Collier  with  his  Cart, 

that  Coals  was  used  to  carry; 
What  Tradesman  art  thou,  the  Devil  then  he  said, 

and  he  caus'd  him  a  while  to  tarry  ? 
For  why  do  I  think,  with  thee  for  to  Drink, 

and  he  call'd  for  a  Glass  Claret ; 
I  know  thee  so  well,  that  thou  comest  from  Hell, 

and  I  think  thou  hast  stole  my  Chariot. 

The  next  that  came  by,  was  a  Chimny-sweeper, 

with  his  Brooms,  his  Poles  and  Shackles  ; 
What  Tradesman  art  thou,  the  Devil  then  he  said, 

thou  usest  all  these  Tackles  ? 
I  prithee  gentle  Blade,  come  tell  me  thy  Trade, 

thy  Face  it  is  so  besmear'd, 

If  thou  hadst  not  been  so  black,  with  thy  Tackles  at 
thy  Back, 

thou  hadst  made  me  damnable  afraid. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  199 

The  next  that  came  by,  was  a  Tawny-moor, 

as  soon  as  the  Devil  did  him  'spy, 
He  leared  on  his  Tawny  Skin, 

saying  Friend,  art  any  kin  to  me  ? 
For  why,  thy  Skin  doth  resemble  our  kin, 

therefore  let  us  walk  together, 
And  tell  me  how  thou  dost  allow 

of  this  Tempestuous  Weather. 

The  next  that  came  by,  was  a  Gun-powder  grinder, 

with  Coals  and  Brimstone  Sifted, 
Who  for  three-quarters  of  a  Year, 

himself  he  had  not  Shifted  : 
Then  up  the  Devil  rose,  and  he  snuft'd  up  his  Nose, 

he  could  endure  no  longer, 
Away  with  this  Fume,  out  of  the  Room, 

it  will  neither  quench  Thirst  nor  Hunger. 

What  Tradesman  art  thou,  the  Devil  then  he  said. 

methinks  I  know  thee  well  ? 
My  Trade  it  is  Gun-powder  for  to  make, 

to  blow  the  Devil  out  of  Hell : 
Oh,  had  I  but  him  here,  his  Bones  I  would  tear, 

he  should  neither  scratch  nor  bite 
I'd  plague  the  Devil  for  all  his  Evil, 

and  make  him  leave  wandring  by  Night. 

The  IRISH  Hallaloo. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

INstead  of  our  Buildings  and  Castles  so  brave, 
Into  our  Caverns  we're  forc'd  for  to  crave, 
When  we  are  driven  along  the  Bogs, 
We  root  up  Putatoes  like  the  wild  Hogs. 

Instead  of  their  Beavers,  and  Castors  so  good, 
In  their  picked  Caps  they  are  forc'd  to  the  Wood : 
And  when  they  are  driven  along  the  Passes, 
They've  nothing  but  Tatters  to  hang  on  their  Arses. 

Instead  of  their  Mantles  lined  with  Plush  : 
They're  forc'd  to  seek  Rags  off  every  Bush  ; 
When  they  have  gotten  a  very  good  Cantle, 
They  go  to  the  Botchers  and  there  make  a  Mantle. 

Instead  of  their  Boots  with  Tops  so  large, 
I'm  sure  they  are  rid  of  that  same  Charge  ; 
Now  they  have  gotten  a  thin  pair  of  Brogues, 
And  into  the  Woods  among  the  wild  Rogues. 

Their  Mutton  and  Beef  they  are  all  wild  Runts, 
Their  Wives  are  all  nasty,  and  so  are  their  — 
But  I'll  keep  my  Fiddle -stick  out  of  their  Cases, 
They  stink  like  Privies,  a  Pox  of  their  A — ses. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


The  LADY'S  New- Years-Gift 

The  Tune  caWd  Newington  Butts. 


WOmen  are  wanton,  yet  cunningly  Coy ; 
Lascivious,  yet  Crafty,  to  make  us  obey : 
When  once  they  have  Noos'd  us,  triumphant  they  ride, 
And  trample  down  Man,  that  was  made  for  their  Guide. 
Cho.  But  let  them  remember  their  Grannum  Eve's  Fate^ 
Lest  thty  smart  for  their  Folly,  repenting  too  late. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

This  Creature  was  made  a  Help-meet  for  the  Man, 

And  so  he  approv'd  her,  deny  it  who  can  ; 
But  surely  poor  Adam  was  soundly  asleep, 
Whilst  out  of  his  Side  this  dear  Blessing  did  creep. 
Cho.  But  let  them  remember,  &c. 

Old  Painters  did  from  them  resembling  the  Snail, 
Their  House  on  their  Backs  was,  and  in  it  their  Tail, 
Implying  that  Modesty  kept  something  in, 
Tho'  now  they'll  expose  all  from  Tail  up  to  Chin. 
Cho.  But  let  them  remember  their  Grannum  Eve's  Fatf, 
Lest  they  smart  for  their  Folly,  repenting  too  late. 

On  a  Campaign  MISS. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  203 

WHat  if  Betty  grows  old, 
and  her  Features  decay ; 
She's  Young  while  she  Drinks, 
'tis  the  Grape  makes  her  gay  : 

See  how  her  Eyes  shine, 

they  sparkle  with  Drink, 
Such  a  Lustre  has  Wine, 

they  never  can  sink, 
Such  a  Lustre  has  Wine  they  never  can  sink. 

Let  the  Fops  doat  on  Faces, 

her  Soul's  my  delight, 
She  can't  want  for  Graces, 

Who  Tipples  all  Night. 

Long  Marches  o'er  Furrows, 

no  place  can  her  find, 
In  spite  of  Camp  sorrows, 

poor  Betty  will  be  kind. 

Boy  fill  up  our  Glasses, 

not  a  Wrinkle  will  stand, 
They're  Fools  who  use  Washes, 

when  Clarefs  at  hand. 

2O4  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Scotch  SONG. 
Set  by  Seignior  BAPTIST. 

•  ,-r  P 

:fbfc£tt:  52SEEJ 

i_!_f —  pe_.i_i 1  _p. 

-*—    •    i±d 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  205 

THE  Weather's  too  bleak  now   to  gang  out   of 

And  faith  by  the  Chimny  Ize  pass  the  long  Hours ; 
And  gin  that  my  Dear  wilt  now  stay  with  me  there, 
It  may  for  blest  Jockey  Freeze  on  the  whole  Year : 

My  bonny  blith  Jenny,  then  never  let's  part, 
No  Cold  here  I  fear,  but  that  of  thy  Heart ; 
This  Weather  together  weze  dally  and  play, 
Enjoying  and  toying,  as  if  it  were  May. 

In  Summer  'tis  sweet  to  trip  o'er  the  Land, 

And  in  the  green  Meadows  to  walk  hand  in  hand  ; 

When  every  Loon 

Of  his  Lass  begs  a  Boon, 
Or  on  the  soft  Grass  gives  her  a  Green-Gown ; 

Our  Leisure,  and  Pleasure 

Shall  now  be  as  great, 

Weze  Tattle,  and  Prattle, 

And  Blessing  reap  ; 

And  when  I  my  Jenny  fast  by  me  do  hold, 
She'll  say  it  is  rather  too  warm  than  too  cold. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

7 he  Sound  Country  LASS. 


THese  London  Wenches  are  so  stout, 
They  care  not  what  they  do  ; 
They  will  not  let  you  have  a  Bout, 
Without  a  Crown  or  two. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


They  double  their  Chaps,  and  Curl  their  Locks, 

Their  Breaths  perfume  they  do  ; 
Their  Tails  are  pepper'd  with  the  Pox, 

And  that  you're  welcome  to. 

But  give  me  the  Buxom  Country  Lass, 

Hot  piping  from  the  Cow ; 
That  will  take  a  touch  upon  the  Grass, 

Ay,  marry,  and  thank  you  too. 

Her  Colour's  as  fresh  as  a  Rose  in  June, 

Her  Temper  as  kind  as  a  Dove  ; 
She'll  please  the  Swain  with  a  wholesome  Tune, 

And  freely  give  her  Love. 

CUCKOLDS  Creation. 


2o8  SONGS  Compleat, 

WHAT'S  a  Cuckold,  learn  of  me, 
Few  can  tell  his  Pedigree, 
Or  his  subtile  Nature  Conster, 
Born  a  Man,  yet  dies  a  Monster. 

Yet  great  Antiquarians  say 
They  spring  from  old  Methuselah, 
Who  after  Noah's  Flood  was  found 
To  have  his  Crest  with  Branches  crown'd. 

But  in  Eden's  happy  shade, 
Such  a  Creature  ne'er  was  made ;    • 
Then  to  cut  off  all  mistaking, 
Cuckolds  are  of  Woman's  making. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


— f-r-p~^~5~~ 

"NT  Othing  than  C/<?<?  e'er  I  knew 
[^       By  Nature  more  befriended; 
Calicos  less  Beautiful,  'tis  true, 
But  by  more  Hearts  attended. 

No  Nymph  alive  with  so  much  Art, 
Receives  her  Shepherd's  firing  ; 

Nor  does  such  Cordial  drops  impart 
To  Love,  when  just  Expiring. 

Why  thus,  ye  Gods,  who  cause  our  smart, 
Do  you  Love's  Gifts  dissever  ? 

Or  why  those  happy  Talents  part, 
Which  shou'd  be  join'd  for  ever? 

For  once  perform  an  Act  for  Grace, 
Implor'd  with  such  devotion ; 

And  give  my  Ccdia  Cloe's  Face, 
Or  Cloe  C&lids  Motion. 

VOL.  rv. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

Dunmore  KATE. 

THere  lately  was  a  Maiden  Fair, 
With  ruddy  Cheeks  and  Nut-brown  hair, 
Who  up  to  Town  did  trudge,  Sir ; 
This  pretty  Maid,  whose  Name  was  Kate, 
Met  here  a  hard  unlucky  Fate, 
As  you  anon  shall  judge,  Sir. 

A  little  e'er  it  did  grow  Dark, 

She  needs  must  walk  into  the  Park, 

The  Gentry  for  to  see,  Sir  ; 
Where  soon  she  met  a  Footman  gay, 
That  stop'd  her  short,  and  made  her  stay, 

To  sit  down  under  Tree,  Sir. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  2  r  r 

This  Footman  swore  he  was  a  Lord, 
Which  soon  made  Katy  to  accord, 

And  grant  him  his  full  Will,  Sir  ; 
She  Kiss'd  his  Lordship  o'er  and  o'er, 
And  open'd  all  her  Country  store, 

And  let  him  take  his  fill,  Sir. 

But  when  she  heard  one  call  out  John, 
Up  rose  her  Spark,  and  strait  was  gone 

To  Trot  before  the  Chair,  Sir ; 
Which  made  this  Damsel  all  alone 
To  sigh  and  sob,  and  make  great  moan, 

And  shed  full  many  a  Tear,  Sir. 

Quoth  she,  if  these  be  London  Tricks, 
God  send  me  down  amongst  my  Dicks, 

That  live  on  Dunsmore  Heath,  Sir; 
If  ever  I  come  here  again, 
Or  e'er  believe  one  Man  in  Ten, 

May  the  De'll  come  stop  my  Breath,  Sir. 


A  SONG,  Set  by  Mr.  Leveridge. 

P    2 


SONGS  Compleat, 

WHEN  Sawney  fust  did  Wooe  me,  he  did  at 
distance  stand, 

Advancing  to  undoe  me,  he  gently  took  my  Hand  ; 
He  gently  rais'd  it  higher,  with  pish  and  much  ado, 
His  Lips  still  creeping  nigher,  at  last  he  Kiss'd  it  too. 

Advancing  more  to  try  me,  with  Love's  inchanting 

He  drew  himself  more  nigh  me,  and  gently  touch'd 

my  Face ; 

He  set  it  all  on  Fire,  with  pish  and  much  ado, 
His  Lips  approaching  nigher,  at  last  he  Kiss'd  me  too. 

Compleatly  to  undo  me,  he  clasp'd  me  in  his  Arms, 
As  tho'  he  wou'd  go  through  me,  and  search  out  all 

my  Charms  ; 
As  though  he  wou'd  go  through  me,  with  Oh,  and 

much  ado, 
As  sure  as  e'er  he  knew  me,  at  last  he  did  it  too. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  213 

Mr.  Dogget's  SONG. 

T  'LL  sing  you  a  Song  of  my  Mistriss  that's  pretty, 
J_      A  Lady  so  frolick  and  gay  ; 
It  tickles  my  Fancy  to  tune  her  sweet  Ditty, 
For  Love  was  all  her  Play. 

She's  witty  and  pretty,  and  tunes  like  a  Fiddle, 

A  Lady  so  froiick  and  gay ; 
She  begins  at  both  Ends,  and  ends  in  the  Middle, 

For  Love  was  all  her  Play. 

She  hugs  and  she  Kisses  without  a  Word  speaking, 

A  Lady  so  frolick  and  gay  ; 
She  falls  on  her  Back  without  flinching  and  squeaking, 

For  Love  was  all  her  Play. 

She's  laden  with  Graces  of  Virtue  and  Honour, 

A  Lady  so  frolick  and  gay ; 
'Twixt  a  fair  pair  of  Sheets  with  warm  Love  upon  her, 

For  Love  was  all  her  Play. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

The  World  drown  d  in  a  GLASS. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  215 

WHAT  need  we  take  care  for  Platoniccd  Rules, 
Or  the  Precepts  of  Aristotle; 
Those  that  think  to  find  Learning  in  Books  are  but 


True  Philosophy  lies  in  the  Bottle  : 
And  the  Mind  that's  confin'd  to  the  Modes  of  the 


Ne'er  arrives  to  the  height  of  a  Pottle : 
Let  the  Sages  of  our  Ages  keep  a  talking  of  our  walk 

Demurely,  whilst  we  that  are  wiser 
Do  abhor  all  that's  Moral  in  Cato  and  Plato, 

And  Seneca  talks  like  a  Sizer  : 
Then  let  full  Bowls,  full  Bottles  and  Bowls  be  hurtd, 

That  our  Jollity  may  be  compleater  ;    , 
For  Man,  tho*  he  be  but  a  very  little  World, 
Must  be  Drowrid  as  well  as  the  greater. 

We  will  drink  till  our  Cheeks  are  as  Star'd  as  the  Skies, 

Let  the  pale  colour'd  Student  flout  us ; 
Till  our  Noses  like  Comets,  set  Fire  on  our  Eyes, 

And  we  bear  the  Horizon  about  us  : 
And  if  all  make  us  fall,  then  our  Heels  shall  divine ; 

What  the  Stars  are  a  doing  without  us  : 
Let  Lilly  go  tell  ye  of  Thunders  and  Wonders, 

And  Astrologers  all  divine  • 
Let  Booker  be  a  looker  in  our  Natures  and  Features, 

He'll  find  nothing  but  Claret  in  mine. 
Then  let  full  Bowls,  &c. 


2  1  6 

SONGS  Compleat, 
My  THING  is  my  Own. 



_^___. .   "^   •-»     .      .      ^ ...•     r    f"   P     J    . 


I  A  tender  young  Maid  have  been  courted  by  many, 
Of  all  sorts  and  Trades  as  ever  was  any  : 
A  spruce  Haberdasher  first  spake  me  fair, 
But  I  would  have  nothing  to  do  with  Small  ware. 
My  Thing  is  my  Own,  and  Pll  keep  it  so  still, 
Yet  other  young  Lasses  may  do  what  they  will. 


Pleasant  and  Divertwe.  2 1 7 

A  sweet  scented  Courtier  did  give  me  a  Kiss, 
And  promts' d  me  Mountains  if  I  would  be  his, 
But  I'll  not  believe  him,  for  it  is  too  true, 
Some  Courtiers  do  promise  much  more  than  they  do. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

A  fine  Man  of  Law  did  come  out  of  the  Strand, 
To  plead  his  own  Cause  with  his  Fee  in  his  Hand; 
He  made  a  brave  Motion  but  that  would  not  do, 
For  I  did  dismiss  him,  and  Nonsuit  him  too. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

Next  came  a  young  Fellow,  a  notable  Spark, 
(With  Green  Bag  and  Inkhorn,  a  Justices  Clark) 
He  pulPd  out  his  Warrant  to  make  all  appear, 
But  I  sent  him  away  with  a  Flea  in  his  Ear. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

A  Master  of  Musick  came  with  an  intent, 
To  give  me  a  Lesson  on  my  Instrument, 
I  thank'd  him  for  nothing,  but  bid  him  be  gone, 
For  my  little  Fiddle  should  not  be  plaid  on. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

An  Usurer  came  with  abundance  of  Cash, 
But  I  had  no  mind  to  come  under  his  Lash, 
He  profer'd  me  Jewels,  and  great  store  of  Gold, 
But  I  would  not  Mortgage  my  little  Free-hold. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

A  blunt  Lieutenant  surpriz'd  my  Placket, 
And  fiercely  began  to  rifle  and  sack  it, 
I  mustered  my  Spirits  up  and  became  bold, 
And  forc'd  my  Lieutenant  to  quit  his  strong  hold. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c . 

A  Crafty  young  Bumpkin  that  was  very  rich, 
And  us'd  with  his  Bargains  to  go  thro'  stitch, 
Did  tender  a  Sum,  but  it  would  not  avail, 
That  I  should  admit  him  my  Tenant  in  tayl. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

2 1 8  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  fine  dapper  Taylor,  with  a  Yard  in  his  Hand, 
Did  prefer  his  Service  to  be  at  Coirmand, 
He  talk'd  of  a  slit  I  had  above  Knee, 
But  I'll  have  no  Taylors  to  stitch  it  for  me. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

A  Gentleman  that  did  talk  much  of  his  Grounds, 
His  Horses,  his  Setting-Dogs,  and  his  Grey-hounds, 
Put  in  for  a  Course,  and  us'd  all  his  Art, 
But  he  mist  of  the  Sport,  for  Puss  would  not  start, 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

A  pretty  young  Squire  new  come  to  the  Town, 
To  empty  his  Pockets,  and  so  to  go  down, 
Did  prefer  a  kindness,  but  I  would  have  none, 
The  same  that  he  us'd  to  his  Mother's  Maid  Joan. 
My  thing  is  my  own,  &c. 

Now  here  I  could  reckon  a  hundred  and  more, 
Besides  all  the  Gamesters  recited  before, 
That  made  their  addresses  in  hopes  of  a  snap 
But  as  young  as  I  was  I  understood  Trap, 
My  thing  is  my  own,  and  /'//  keep  it  so  still, 
Until  2  be  Marry  ed,  say  Men  what  they  will. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive. 


The  Gardeners  SONG  :   Words  by  Mr. 
Samuel  Wilde. 

IN  the  World  can  ever  a  Trade  be  found, 
Like  Gardiners,  which  replenish  the  Ground ; 
And  makes  the  Earth  by  Providence's  Hand, 
Yield  great  fruition  unto  the  Land  ? 
To  Mortals  we  render  plenty 
Of  Dishes  fine  and  dainty, 
As  Fruit  and  Sallads, 
To  pleasure  the  Palates 

Of  each  Man, 

Which  is  a  Lesson  to  teach  Man 
How  we  Gard'ners  gain  the  Praise. 


220  SONGS  Compleat, 

Before  that  Adam  in  Paradise  he 
Had  tasted  of  the  forbidden  Tree  ; 
It  was  unlawful  for  any  to  Kill, 
Or  the  Blood  of  living  Creatures  to  spill : 
The  Fruit  and  the  Herbs  were  ordained 
Whereby  they  should  be  sustained, 

Without  any  Strangling, 

Or  Killing  and  Mangling 
Each  Creature ; 

Can  any  Maxim  be  greater, 

For  the  Gardiners  chiefest  Praise  ? 

The  Metropolitan  Gardiners  Trade, 
While  Earth  continues,  can  never  Fade  ; 
For  from  the  Ground  we  raise  up  a  store, 
To  pleasure  the  Rich,  and  nourish  the  Poor  : 
Our  Trade  is  the  World's  Physician, 
To  suit  each  Patient's  Condition ; 

For  whatever  ceases, 

We  heal  most  Diseases 
Of  all  Men, 

That  happens,  or  ever  befal  Men  : 

Thus  we  Gardiners  gain  the  Praise. 

The  skilful  Doctors  might  pick  their  Nails, 
If  ever  the  Trade  of  the  Gardiners  fails  ; 
For  by  our  Herbs,  the  rarest  Compounds 
Are  made  to  cleanse,  and  to  heal  the  Wounds 
That  incident  happens  to  any, 
And  is  well  known  unto  many, 

That  have  been  pained, 

And  sorely  complained 
Of  Sorrow, 

Yet  have  found  Ease  on  the  Morrow  : 

Thus  we  Gardiners  gain  the  Praise. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  221 

The  Second  PART. 

T  N  the  Gardiners  Paradise  sweetly  grows, 
|     Carnations,  Pinks,  and  the  Damask  Rose ; 
With  hundreds  of  Flowers,  whose  fragrant  Scent 
Enjoyns  in  one  for  to  yield  Content : 
Where  Mortals  may  ravish  their  Senses, 
With  Odours  and  sweet  Influences 

That  comes  from  the  Flowers, 

Which  favouring  Showers 
Sets  Springing, 

And  pretty  Birds  are  singing, 

Pleasant  Notes  in  the  Gardiners  Praise, 

All  sorts  of  Apples,  with  Pears  and  Mulberries, 
Nuts,  Grapes  and  Pippins,  with  black  and  red 

Cherries ; 

Rare  Peaches,  Plumbs,  Apricocks  and  Quinces, 
To  Pleasure  the  Eye  and  the  Pallate  of  Princes  : 
Can  any  possess  such  a  Treasure, 
And  not  be  enjoyed  with  Pleasure  ; 

Where  Currants  and  Gooseberries, 

Rasberries  and  Strawberries 
Invites  you, 

Then  taste  of  the  Fruit  that  Delights  you, 

And  you'll  render  the  Gardiners  Praise. 

What  Flesh  is  fitting  for  Man  to  Eat, 
Until  our  Herbs  do  savour  the  Meat  ? 
To  Roast  or  Boil'd,  they  answer  both, 
As  Sawce  and  Sallads,  and  Herbs  for  Broth, 
Our  fragrant  Garden  presents  you 
Each  several  Kinds  to  content  you  ; 

Baum,  Thime,  Winter-Savory, 

Mint,  Sage,  and  Rosemary, 
Whose  Sweetness 

Orders  the  Food  with  Compleatn  ess  : 

This  aspires  the  Gardiners  Praise. 


222  SONGS  Compleat, 

What  Plants  and  Roots,  and  various  things, 
To  pleasure  the  World  in  the  Garden  Springs ; 
The  Artichoak,  Cabbage  and  Collirlower, 
And  Coleworts,  our  Garden  affords  a  power  : 
With  Parsnips,  and  Carrots,  and  Onions, 
Young  Cucumbers,  Beets  and  Muskmelons  j 
And  all  things  to  eat 
With  those  kinds  of  Meat 

That's  Ordained, 
Or  in  the  World  is  contained  : 
Thus  we  Gardiners  gain  the  Praise. 

Sir  William  Butler  s  Bald  Colt. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  223 

WE11  I'll  say  that  for  Sir  William  Builds  Bald 

He's  as  good  as  any's  in  the  Town  a; 
Nay,  more  than  that,  Sir  William  Butler's  Bald  Colt 
Has  kick'd  many  a  Man  down  a. 

Toll,  toll,  &c. 
My  Gaffer  Hunt  ran  after  Sir    William  Butler's  Bald 


Crying  out,  Ho,  Ball,  Ho  stand  a; 
Why,  that  was  as  much  as  to  say,  as  if  Sir    William 

Butler's  Bald  Colt, 
Was  at  my  Gaffer  Hunt's  Command  a. 

Toll,  toll,  &c. 
Sir  William  Butler's  Bald  Colt  clapt  his   Ears  in  his 


And  ran  most  lamentable ; 
But  for  my  Gaffer  Hunt  to  catch  Sir  William  Butler's 

Bald  Colt, 
G — z — s  he  was  not  able. 

Toll,  toll,  &c. 
My  Gaffer  Hunt  follow'd  Sir   William  Butler's  bald 


As  far  as  Ensham  Church  a  ; 
And  if  my  Gaffer  Hunt  had  caught  Sir  William  Butler's 

bald  Colt, 
He  had  claw'd  his  Arse  with  Birch  a. 

Toll,  toll,  &c. 
Or  if  he  had'nt  claw'd  his  Arse  with  Birch, 

He  had  firk'd  his  Cods  with  Holly ; 
But  for  my  Gaffer  Hunt  to  set  his  Wit  to  Sir  William 

Butler's  bald  Colt, 
G — z — s,  'twas  but  a  Folly. 

Toll,  toll,  &c. 
At  last  Sir  William  Butler's  bald  Colt 

Jump'd  into  another  Man's  Ground  a ; 
And  there  my  Gaffer  Hunt  he  caught  Sir  William 

Butler's  bald  Colt, 
And  put  him  into  the  Pound  a. 
Toll,  toll,  &c. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

EN  FIELD  Common, 

i  I         tU 

ON  Enfield  Common,  I  met  a  Woman, 
A  bringing  North-Hall  Water  to  the  Town  ; 
Said  I  fair  Maiden,  you're  heavy  laden, 

I'll  light  and  give  you  ease  in  a  Green  Gown  : 
Says  she,  'tis  good  Sir,  to  stir  the  Blood,  Sir, 

For  the  Green-sickness,  Friend,  will  make  me  like  it ; 
Then  in  a  Minute  I  left  my  Gennett, 

And  went  aside  with  her  into  a  Thicket : 
Then  with  her  leave  there,  a  Dose  I  gave  her, 

She  straight  confess'd  her  Sickness  I  did  nick  it. 

I  went  to  leave  her,  but  this  did  grieve  her, 
For  panting  on  the  Grass  she  did  complain ; 

Saying  Physician,  my  Sick  Condition, 
I  fear  will  suddenly  return  again  ; 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  225 

If  you  deny  me,  and  don't  supply  me 

With  many  Potions  of  your  sweetest  Pleasure  : 

Then  prithee  Gallant  improve  thy  Talent, 
Since  we  have  Opportunity  and  Leisure  ; 

With  such  like  Greeting,  my  pretty  Sweeting, 
She  seem'd  to  press  upon  me  without  measure. 

'Twas  Summer  Weather,  we  sat  together, 

And  chatted  all  the  pleasant  Afternoon ; 
No  one  was  near  us,  to  over-hear  us, 

At  length  I  said  I'd  put  my  Pipes  in  Tune : 
To  give  a  Glister,  with  that  I  kiss'd  her, 

She  cry'd  another  Fit  do's  round  me  hover ; 
With  the  Green  Rushes  I'll  veil  my  Blushes, 

For  in  my  Cheeks  I  know  you  may  discover 
What's  my  desire,  Love  never  Tire, 

For  Oh  !  I  long,  I  long,  to  be  a  Mother. 

With  that  I  told  her,  that  I  wou'd  hold  her, 

A  Guinea  to  a  Groat  it  should  be  so ; 
In  Nine  Months  after,  a  Son  or  Daughter, 

Will  be  your  lucky  Lot,  Dear  Love  I  know  : 
Quoth  she,  you  Vapour,  and  draw  your  Rapier, 

But  yet  methinks  too  soon  you  seem  to  tire  ; 
I'll  lay  a  Shilling,  if  you  are  willing, 

That  Nine  Months  hence  I  have  not  my  desire ; 
Except  you'll  venture,  once  more  to  enter, 

Alas  !  the  Name  of  Mother  I  admire. 

Because  I'd  ease  her,  and  fully  please  her, 

I  took  a  Lodging  for  my  Enfield  Lass ; 
Who  was  a  Beauty,  and  knew  her  Duty, 

The  Night  we  did  in  youthful  pleasures  pass, 
With  melting  Blisses,  and  charming  Kisses, 

On  downy  Beds  secure  from  Wind  and  Weather  • 
And  in  the  Morning,  by  Day's  adorning, 

We  rose  and  drank  a  Glass  of  Wine  together  : 
With  Joys  I  crown'd  her,  for  then  I  found  her, 

To  have  a  Heart  far  lighter  than  a  Feather. 

VOL.  IV. 

226  SONGS  Compleat, 

I  have  cur'd  her,  likewise  assur'd  her, 

If  e'er  it  was  my  luck  to  come  that  way  ; 
I'd  pawn  my  Honour,  to  call  upon  her, 

But  for  that  time  I  could  no  longer  stay : 
The  loving  creature,  of  pure  good  nature, 

She  gave  me  Twenty  Kisses  when  we  parted  ; 
Because  she  never  had  found  such  favour, 

In  Loves  soft  Pleasures  to  be  so  diverted : 
Then  straight  I  mounted,  for  why  I  counted, 

'Twas  time  I  had  her  company  deserted. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 


LET  Monarchs  Fight  for  Pow'r  and  Fame, 
With  Noise  and  Arms  Mankind  Alarms 
Let  daily  Fears,  their  Quiet  fright, 
And  Fear  disturb  their  Rest  at  Night : 
Greatness  shall  ne'er  my  Soul  enthrall, 
Give  me  Content,  and  I  have  all. 

Hear  mighty  Love,  to  thee  I  call, 
Give  me  Astrea,  she's  my  all, 
That  Soft,  that  Sweet,  that  charming  Fair, 
Fate  cannot  hurt  while  \  have  her ; 
She's  Wealth  and  Pow'r,  and  only  she, 
Astrea's  all  the  World  to  me. 

Q  2 


SONGS  Compleat, 


Set  by  Mr.  LEVERIDGE. 

— F-t 


_P2.  L-U-, 



Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  229 

JOgging  on  from  yonder  Green, 
Oh  the  pleasant  sight  I've  seen ; 
John  and  Dolley  jog,  jog,  jogging, 
John  and  Dolley  jogging  on, 
Themselves  Cooling,  Johney  was  fooling, 
Cry'd  she  will  you  ne'er  have  done, 
Jog,  Jog,  Jog,  Jog,  jog,  jog,  jogging  on : 
The  Sun  shines,  make  Hay, 
Make  Hay,  make  Hay,  make  Hay  good  John ; 
Hey  ho,  hey  ho,  that  I  might  do  so, 
Jog,  jog,  jog,  jog,  jogging, 
Jog,  jog,  jog,  jogging  on. 

John  to  ease  her  of  her  Pain, 

Ended,  and  begun  again, 

He  grew  weary,  jog,  jog,  jogging, 

She  more  Cheary,  jogging  on,  j 

Cry'd  my  deary,  prithee  tarry, 

Sure  you  han't  already  done  ; 

Jog,  jog,  jog,  jog,  jog,  jog,  jogging  on; 

The  Sun's  down,  pray  stay, 
Pray  stay,  pray  stay,  good  John, 
Hey  ho,  that  I  might  do  so, 
Jog,  jog,  jogging  on. 


SONGS  Compleaty 

A  Scotch  SONG. 

£Arweel  bonny  Wully  Craig, 
Farweel  to  au  thy  broken  Vows  to  me ; 
u  wast  a  lovely  Lad, 

When  on  the  Grass  thou  tempted'st  me  : 
Full  oft  have  I  dry'd  mine  Eyn, 

When  by  my  seln  to  Milking  I  have  gean ; 
Oft  have  I  gist  the  Green, 

Where  Wully  vow'd  to  be  my  Swain. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  231 

Sea  neat  was  my  conny  Lad, 

With  new  Russet  Shoon,  and  Holland  Band  ; 
But  now  he's  won  his  way, 

With  Maiden-head,  and  Leve  and  au  : 
His  Locks  were  sea  finely  seam'd 

And  shone  as  bright  as  any  in  the  Land ; 
But  now  he's  won  his  way, 

With  Maided-head,  and  Leve  and  au. 

Ise  ene  thraw  away  my  Skeel, 

And  gang  nea  mere  to  yonder  fatal  Brow ; 
Where  I  was  pleas'd  sea  weel, 

But  now  I  feel  meer  ner  others  do  : 
He  took  me  by  the  wulling  Hand, 

And  vow'd  to  Hea'n  how  he  wad  constant  be ; 
When  levingly  we  laid 

Under  the  shade  of  the  Wullow-tree. 

But  ah  !  when  the  Loon  had  deun, 

He  nothing  more  of  Love  cou'd  shew ; 
But  now  he's  won  his  way, 

With  Maiden-head,  and  Leve  and  au  : 
My  VVeam  now  begins  to  fill, 

And  seun  the  bonny  Bird  will  crow  : 
Tho'  he  was  won  his  way, 

With  Maiden-head,  and  Leve  and  au. 

232  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  SONG.     Set  by  Mr.  Leveridge. 

— | 
— — I 

EArly  in  the  dawning  of  a  Winters  morn, 
Brother  Zto/fc  and  I  went  forth  into  the  Barn ; 
To  get  our  selves  a  heat, 
By  Thrashing  of  the  Wheat, 
From  the  Stack,  from  the  Stack,  from  the  Stack,  the 

Stack  : 

The  Straws  they  flew  about, 
And  the  Flails  they  kept  a  rout, 
With  a  Thwack,  Thwack,  Thwack,  Thwack,  Thwack. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  233 

Margery  came  in  then  with  an  Earthen  Pot, 
Full  of  Pudding  that  was  piping  hot ; 

I  caught  her  by  the  Neck  fast, 

And  thank'd  her  for  my  Breakfast, 
With  a  Smack,  &c. 

Then  up  went  her  Tail, 

And  down  went  the  Flail, 
With  a  Thwack,  &c. 

Dick  Threshing  on,  cry'd  out  fie  for  shame, 
Must  I  beat  the  Bush  while  you  catch  the  Game ; 

Sow  your  wild  Oats, 

And  mind  not  her  wild  Notes, 
Of  alack,  &c. 

Faith  I  did  the  Jobb, 

While  the  Flail  bore  a  bob, 
With  a  Thwack,  drv. 

She  shook  off  the  Straws  and  did  nothing  ail, 
Swearing  there  was  no  defence  against  a  Flail, 

But  quietly  lay  still, 

And  bid  me  fill,  fill,  fill, 
Her  Sack,  &c. 

But  'twas  all  in  vain, 

For  I  had  spilt  my  Grain, 
With  a  Thwack,  dw. 

SONGS  Compleat, 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  235 

WHat  shall  I  do  to  shew  how  much  I  love  her, 
How  many  Millions  of  Sighs  can  suffice  ? 
That  which  wins  other  Hearts  ne'er  can  move  her, 
Those  common  methods  of  Love  she'll  despise : 
I  will  love  more  than  Man  e'er  lov'd  before  me, 

Gaze  on  her  all  the  Day,  and  melt  all  the  Night, 
'Till  for  her  own  sake  at  last  she'll  implore  me, 
To  Love  her  less  to  preserve  our  delight. 

Since  Gods  themselves  could  not  ever  be  Loving, 

Men  must  have  breathing  Recruits  for  new  Joys  ; 
I  wish  my  Soul  could  be  ever  improving, 

Tho'  eager  Love,  more  than  sorrow  destroys. 
In  fair  Aurelicts  Arms,  leave  me  expiring, 

To  be  Imbalm'd  with  the  sweets  of  her  Breath  ; 
To  the  last  moment  I'll  still  be  desiring  j 

Never  had  Hero  so  glorious  a  Death. 

236  SONGS  Compleat, 




Q/^—i — t11 



Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  237 

COuld  Man  his  Wish  obtain, 
How  happy  would  he  be  ? 
But  Wishes  seldom  gain, 
And  Hopes  are  but  in  vain, 

If  Fortune  disagree : 
Pity  ye  Pow'rs  of  Love, 

Our  Infelicity, 

Why  should  the  Fates  conspire, 
To  frustrate  my  desire, 
Since  Love's  a  gentle  Fire, 

That  keeps  the  World  alive  : 
But  me  it  puts  to  Pain: 
It  makes  me  wish  in  vain,  in  vain, 

Nor  promise  any  hopes  to  give. 

I  love,  and  still  I  view, 

Yet  dare  not  tell  my  Mind ; 
Should  I  my  Flames  pursue, 
It  might  that  Bliss  undo, 

Which  is  for  her  design'd. 
A  Blessing  far  above, 

More  lasting,  rich  and  kind  ; 
Though  Hopes  successful  prove 
My  Heart  shall  ne'er  remove 
From  wishing  of  her  Love, 

In  Fortune's  Triumphs  lead  : 
And  tho'  it  banish  me, 
If  she  but  happy  be, 

'Twould  please  my  Ghost  when  I  am  dead 

238  SONGS  Compleat, 



Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  239 

WHy  does  the  Morn  in  Blushes  rise, 
Tell  me,  O  God  of  Days  ? 
Clarona,  oh  !   Claronds  Eyes, 

Out-shine  the  brightest  Rays, 
Tis  true,  'tis  true,  she's  far  more  bright, 

Dim  taper  God  be  gone, 
And  hide  thy  baffled  Beams  in  Night, 
Let  her  rule  Day  alone. 

If  Anchorite-like,  full  twenty  Years 

On  Earth's  cold  Bed  I'd  lain, 
And  woo'd  the  Gods  with  Fasts  and  Pray'rs, 

Celestial  Crowns  to  gain  : 
Yet  after  all,  could  you  but  love, 

No  more  would  I  pursue 
The  endless  search  of  Joys  above, 

But  find  out  Heav'n  in  you. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

1  ^Arewel  the  Darling  Shades  I  love, 
|        The  calm  retirement  of  my  Life, 
Where  Pleasures  boundless  as  above, 
Free  from  all  Envy,  Noise,  or  Strife  : 
No  Passions  e'er  infest  the  Plains, 
Contentment  there  immortal  reigns  ; 
No  Passions  e'er  infest  the  Plains,  &c. 

Were  I  to  chuse  what  Fate  denies, 
Could  I  command  my  Frowning  Stars, 

Cities  should  in  Confusion  lie, 

E'er  I'd  embrace  their  restless  Cares ; 

Oh  !  that  I  might  near  gentle  Streams, 

Spend  my  dull  Hours  in  Golden  Dreams. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


A  New  SONG.     The  Good  Fellow. 


A   LL  Hail  to  the  Days  that  merit  more  Praise, 
/-\     Than  all  the  rest  of  the  Year ; 
And  welcome  the  Nights  that  bringeth  delights, 

As  well  to  the  Poor  as  the  Peer. 
Good  Fortune  attend  each  merry  Man's  Friend, 

That  doth  but  the, best  he  may  ; 
Forgetting  old  Wrong  with  Cup  or  a  Song, 

To  drive  the  cold  Winter  away. 
To  drive,  &c. 

Let  Misery  pack  with  a  Whip  at  his  Back, 

Down  to  the  Tartarian  Flood ; 
In  Lethe  profound  let  Envy  be  drown'd, 

That  pines  at  another  Man's  Good  : 
VOL.  iv.  R  Let 

242  SONGS   Compleat, 

Let  Sorrow's  Expence  come  a  thousand  Years  hence, 

All  Payments  have  great  delay  ; 
And  spend  the  long  Nights  in  honest  Delights, 

To  drive  the  cold  Winter  away. 
To  drive,  &c. 

The  Court  in  his  State  sets  open  his  Gate, 

And  gives  free  welcome  to  most : 
The  City  likewise,  tho'  something  Precise, 

Yet  willingly  parts  with  their  Roast : 
But  yet  by  Report  from  City  and  Court, 

The  Country  gets  the  Day  ; 
More  Liquor  is  spent  with  better  Content, 

To  drive  the  cold  Winter  away. 
To  drive,  &c. 

The  Gentry  there,  for  Cost  doth  not  spare, 

The  Yeomanry  fast  not  till  Lent ; 
The  Farmers  and  such,  think  nothing  too  much, 

So  they  keep  but  to  pay  for  their  Rent : 
The  poorest  of  all  do  merrily  call, 

When  at  a  fit  place  they  stay, 
P  or  a  Song  or  a  Tale,  or  a  Cup  of  good  Ale, 

To  drive  the  Cold  Winter  away. 
To  drive,  &c. 

'Tis  ill  for  a  Mind  to  Envy  inclin'd, 

To  think  of  small  Injuries  now  : 
If  Wrath  be  to  seek,  do  not  let  her  thy  Cheek, 

Nor  yet  to  Inhabit  thy  Brow  : 
Cross  out  of  thy  Books  all  Malecontent  Looks, 

Let  Beauty  and  Youth  decay, 
And  wholly  consert  with  Mirth  and  with  Sport, 

To  drive  the  cold  Winter  away. 
To  drive,  &c. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  five. 



Upon  the  New  INN,  with  the  famoiis  Sign- 
Post,  called  the  WHITE- HART,  at  SKOLE 


ID  not  you  hear 

Of  a  Wonder  last  Year, 
That  thro'  all  Norfolk  did  ring, 
Of  an  Inn  and  an  Host, 
With  a  Sign  and  a  ./fo/, 
That  might  hold  (God  bless  us)  the  King. 

The  Building  is  great 

And  very  compleat, 
But  cannot  be  compar'd  to  the  Sign, 

But  within  Doors  I  think 

Scarce  a  drop  of  good  Drink, 
For  Bacchus  drinks  all  the  best  Wine 

R  2 


244  SONGS  Compleat, 

But  here's  the  design, 

What's  amiss  in  the  Wine 
By  Wenches  shall  be  supply'd ; 

There's  three  on  a  row 

Stands  out  for  a  show, 
To  draw  in  the  Gallants  that  Ride. 

The  first  of  the  Three, 

Diana  should  be, 
But  she  Cuckolded  poor  Acteon, 

And  his  Head  she  adorns 

With  such  visible  Horns, 
That  he's  fit  for  his  Hounds  for  to  prey  on. 

'Tis  unsafe  we  do  find 

To  trust  Woman-kind, 
Since  Homing's  a  part  of  their  Trade  : 

Diana  is  patch'd 

As  a  Goddess  that's  chaste, 
Yet  Acteon  a  Monster  she  made. 

The  next  Wench  doth  stand 

With  the  Scales  in  her  Hand 
And  is  ready  to  come  at  your  beck ; 

A  new  trick  they've  found, 

To  sell  Sack  by  the  Pound, 
But  'twere  better  they'd  sell't  by  the  Peck. 

The  last  of  the  three, 

They  say  Prudence  must  be, 
With  the  Serpent  and  Horn  of  Plenty  ; 

But  Plenty  and  Wit 

So  seldom  doth  hit, 
That  they  fall  not  to  one  in  Twenty. 

But  above  these  things  all 

Stands  a  Fellow  that's  small, 
With  a  Quadrant  discerning  the  Wind, 

And  say's  he's  a  Fool 

That  Travels  from  Skole, 
And  leave  his  good  Liquor  behind. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  245 

Near  the  top  of  the  Sign 

Stands  there  on  a  Line, 
One  is  Temperance  still  pouring  out ; 

And  Fortitude  will 

Drink  what  Temperance  fill, 
And  fears  not  the  Stone  or  the  Gout. 

The  next  to  these  three, 

You'll  an  Usurer  see, 
With  a  Prodigal  Child  in  his  Mouth  : 

'Tis  Time  (as  some  say) 

And  well  so  it  may, 
For  they  be  devourers  both. 

The  last  that  you  stare  on. 

Is  old  Father  Caron, 
Who's  wafting  a  Wench  o'er  the  Ferry, 

Where  Cerbeus  does  stand, 

Tc  watch  where  they  Land, 
And  together  they  go  to  be  Merry.    ' 

Now  to  see  such  a  change, 

Is  a  thing  that  is  strange, 
That  one,  who  as  Stories  do  tell  us  ; 

His  Money  has  lent, 

At  Fifty  per  Cent, 
A  College  should  build  for  good  Fellows. 

But  under  this  Work, 

Does  a  Mystery  lurk, 
That  shews  us  the  Founder's  Design ; 

He  has  chalk'd  out  the  way, 

For  Gallants  to  stray, 
That  their  Lands  may  be  his  in  fine. 

That's  first  an  Ale-Bench, 

Next  Hounds,  then  a  Wench, 
With  these  three  to  roar  and  to  Revel ; 

Brings  the  Prodigal's  Lands, 

To  the  Usurer's  Hands, 
And  his  Body  and  Soul  to  the  Devil. 


246  SONGS  Compleat, 

Now  if  you  would  know 

After  all  this  ado, 
By  what  name  this  Sign  shou'd  be  known  ; 

Some  call  it  this,  and  some  that, 

And  some  I  know  not  what ; 
But  'tis  many  Signs  in  one. 

'Tis  a  sign  that  who  built  it, 

Had  more  Money  than  Wit, 
And  more  Wealth  than  he  got  or  can  use ; 

'Tis  a  sign  that  all  we 

Have  less  Wit  than  he, 
That  come  thither  to  drink,  and  may  chuse. 


V  ~*+^-       Tl  \^/ 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  247 



/r/V  I  sigh  and  hourly  die, 
But  not  for  a  Lip  nor  a  languishing  Eye  ; 
>  fickle  and  false,  and  there  we  agree, 
Oh  !  these  are  the  Virtues  that  Captivate  me  : 
We  neither  believe  what  either  can  say, 
And  neither  believing  we  neither  betray. 

1Tis  civil  to  swear  and  say  things  of  course, 
We  mean  not  the  taking  for  better  for  Worse, 
When  present  we  Love,  when  absent  agree, 
I  think  not  of  fris,  nor  Iris  of  me  : 
The  Legend  of  Love,  no  couple  can  find, 
So  easie  to  part,  and  so  easily  joyn'd. 

248  SONGS  Compleat, 


^ f5- r— *-\-^-0-0— *-$?$£- 




Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  249 

WHen  Aurelia  first  I  courted, 
She  had  Youth  and  Beauty  too ; 
Killing  Pleasures  when  she  sported, 
And  her  Charms  were  ever  New  : 
Conqu'ring  Time  does  now  deceive  her ; 

Which  her  Glories  did  uphold  : 
All  her  Arts  can  ne'er  retrieve  her, 
Poor  Aurelia 's  growing  old. 

The  Airy  Spirits  which  invited, 

Are  retir'd,  and  move  no  more ; 
And  her  Eyes  are  now  benighted, 

Which  were  Comets  heretofore  : 
Want  of  these  abates  her  Merits, 

Yet  I've  Passion  for  her  Name  : 
Only  kind  and  Active  Spirits 

Kindle,  and  maintain  the  Flame. 




T  N  the  Shade  upon  the  Grass, 

J[      Where  Nymphs  and  Shepherds  lye ; 

Will  was  courting  of  a  Lass, 

And  -Afc//  stood  list'ning  by  : 
Quoth  Will,  You  will  not  tarry 
Two  Months  before  you  Marry, 

Fye,  no,  fye,  no,  never  tell  me  so ; 
For  a  Maid  I'll  live  and  dye, 
Quoth  Nell,  So  will  not  I. 

Long  Debates  in  Hopes  and  Fears, 

With  Kisses  mixt  between, 
With  a  Song  he  charm'd  her  Ears, 

How  Minds  have  alter'd  been  : 
Finding  his  Love  grown  stronger, 
For  fear  of  staying  longer, 
Cry'd,  Good  now,  pray  now,  If  you  love  me  let  me  go, 

For  fear  you  change  my  Mind, 

And  leave  my  Heart  behind. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  251 


HAppy  the  Time  when  free  from  Love, 
I  rang'd  the  Woods  and  ev'ry  Grove ; 
I  minded  not  the  Great  One's  Fall, 
Nor  whom  Ambition  did  enthrall, 
I  minded  not,  &c. 

My  only  care  was  how  to  keep, 

From  cruel  Wolves  my  harmless  Sheep  : 

But  tho'  from  Wolves  my  Sheep  I  kept, 
None  could  my  Heart  from  Love  protect. 
But  tho\  &c. 

There  is  not  one  upon  these  Plains, 

That  Loves  like  me  of  all  the  Swains ; 

But  I  have  learn'd  now  to  my  cost, 
That  who  Love's  best  must  suffer  most. 
But  I  have,  &c. 


SONGS  Compleat, 





Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  253 

WHilst  Europe  is  alarm'd  with  Wars 
And  Rome  foments  the  Christian  Jars 
Whilst  Europe  is  alarm'd  with  Wars, 
And  Rome  foments  the  Christian  Jars  ; 
Whilst  guilty  Britain  fears  her  Fate, 
And  would  repent  her  Crimes  too  late, 
And  would  repent  her  Crimes  too  late. 

Here  safe  in  confin'd  Retreat, 
I  see  the  Waves  about  me  beat, 

And  envy  none,  and  envy  none, 

That  dare  be  great, 
Envy  none  that  dare  be  great. 

A  quiet  Conscience,  and  a  Friend, 
Help  me  my  happy  Hours  to  spend  ; 
Let  Celia  to  my  Cell  resort, 
She  turns  my  Prison  to  a  Court, 
Instead  of  Guards  by  Day  and  Night, 
Let  Celia  still  be  in  my  Sight, 
And  then  they  need  not  fear  my  flight. 

Could  sense  of  Servile  fear  prevail, 

Or  could  my  Native  Honour  fail, 

Her  sight  would  all  my  Doubts  controul, 
And  give  me  back  my  peaceful  Soul, 

Such  charming  Truths  her  Words  contain, 

Or  if  her  Angel  Voice  refrain, 

Her  Eyes  can  never  plead  in  vain. 

•    ++* 


SONGS  Compleat, 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

IN  Courts,  Ambition  kills  the  great, 
In  Cities,  strive  for  needless  gain ; 
Some  do  in  Battles  meet  their  Fate, 

But  I  by  Love,  by  Love  am  slain  : 
Phaeton  by  Thunder,  Thunder  dy'd, 
Prometheus  by  the  Vulture's  Pain  ; 
This  doom'd  for  Stealth,  and  that  for  Pride, 
But  I  by  Love,  by  Love  am  slain. 

Let  noisy  desperate  Fools  be  brave, 

And  build  up  Trophies  to  the  Skies  ; 
My  only  Wish,  ye  Gods  I  have, 

When  at  ClorindcCs  Feet  I  die  : 
When  I  like  some  to  Greatness  born, 

To  Fame  and  Empire  rais'd  up  high ; 
That  Fame,  that  Empire  I  wou'd  scorn, 

And  at  Clorindds.  Feet  wou'd  die. 



256  SONGS  Compleat, 

I  Here  is  one  black  and  sullen  Hour, 
Which  Fate  decreed  our  Life  shoulol  know ; 
we  should  slight  Almighty  Pow'r, 
Rapt  with  the  Joys  we  find  below  : 
Tis  past,  dear  Cynthia  !  now  let  Frowns  be  gone, 
A  long,  long  Penance  I  have  done ; 
A  long,  long  Penance  I  have  done, 
For  Crimes  alas  !  to  me  unknown. 

In  each  soft  Hour  of  silent  Night, 

Your  Image  in  my  Dreams  appears  ; 
I  grasp  the  Soul  of  my  Delight, 

Slumber  in  Joy,  but  wake  in  Tears  : 
Ah  faithless  charming  Saint !  what  will  you  do  ? 
Let  me  not  think  I  am  by  you ; 

Let  me  not  think  I  am  by  you  ! 

Lov'd  worse,  lov'd  worse  for  being  true. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  257 

A   SONG. 


258  SONGS  Compleat, 

&LIA,  that  I  once  was  blest, 
Is  now  ^e  Torment  of  my  breast 
Since  to  cure  me, 
You  bereave  me, 
Of  the  Pleasure  I  possess  : 
Cruel  Creature  to  deceive  me, 
First  to  Love,  and  then  to  leave  me  ; 
Cruel  Creature  to  deceive  me, 
First  to  Love,  and  then  to  leave  me. 

Had  you  the  Bliss  refus'd  to  grant, 
I  then  had  never  known  the  want  ; 

But  possessing, 

Once  the  Blessing, 
Is  the  cause  of  my  complaint  : 
Once  possessing  is  but  tasting, 
Tis  no  Bliss  that  is  not  lasting. 

Calia,  now  is  mine  no  more, 
But  I'm  hers,  and  must  adore  ; 
Nor  to  leave  her, 
Will  endeavour, 

Charms  that  Captiv'd  me  before  : 
No  unkindness  can  dissever, 
Love  that's  true  is  Love  for  ever. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 


A  BALLAD  of  the  NOSE. 

merry  Lads  met  at  the 
_     To  speak  in  the  Praises  of  the  Nose  ; 
The  Nose  that  stands  in  the  Middle  place, 
Sets  out  the  Beauty  of  the  Face  : 
The  Nose  with  which  we  have  begun, 
Will  serve  to  make  our  Verses  run  ; 
Invention  often  barren  grows , 
Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

s  2  The 

260  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Nose  his  end's  so  high  a  Prize, 
That  Men  prefer't  before  their  Eyes  ; 
And  no  Man  takes  him  for  his  Friend, 
That  boldly  takes  his  Nose  by  th'  end : 
The  Nose  that  like  Euripus  flows, 
The  Sea  that  did  the  Wise  man  pose  ; 
Invention  often  barren  grows, 
Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

The  Nose  is  of  as  many  kinds, 
As  Marriners  can  reckon  Winds ; 
The  long,  the  short,  the  Nose  display'd, 
The  great  Nose  which  did  fright  the  Maid : 
The  Nose  through  which  the  Brother-hood, 
Do  parly  for  their  Sisters  good. 
Invention  often  barren  grows, 
Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

The  flat,  the  sharp,  the  Roman  snout, 
The  Hawks  Nose  circled  round  about ; 
The  Crooked  Nose  that  stands  awry, 
The  Ruby  Nose  of  Scarlet  dye  : 
The  Brazen  Nose  without  a  Face, 
That  doth  the  Learned  College  grace. 
Invention  often  barren  grows, 
Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

The  long  Nose  when  the  Teeth  appear, 
Shews  what's  a  Clock,  if  Day  be  clear ; 
The  broad  Nose  stands  in  Buckler's  place, 
And  takes  the  blows  from  all  the  Face : 
The  Nose  being  plain  without  a  Ridge, 
Will  serve  sometimes  to  make  a  Bridge. 
Invention  often  barren  grows, 
Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  26 1 

The  short  Nose  is  the  Lover's  Bliss, 
Because  it  hinders  not  a  Kiss  ; 
The  tooting  Nose,  O  monstrous  thing  ! 
That's  he  that  did  the  Bottle  bring  : 
And  he  that  brought  the  Bottle  hither, 
Will  drink  (O  monstrous  !)  out  of  measure. 

Invention  often  barren  grows, 

Yet  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

The  Fiery  Nose  in  Lanthorn  stea,d, 
May  light  his  Master  home  to  Bed  ; 
And  whosoever  this  Treasure  owes, 
Grows  poor  in  Purse,  tho'  rich  in  Nose  : 
The  Brazen  Nose  that's  o'er  the  Gate, 
Maintains  full  many  a  Latin  Pate. 

Invention  often  barren  grows, 

Yd  still  there's  Matter  in  the  Nose. 

If  any  Nose  take  this  in  Snuff, 
And  think  it  is  more  than  enough ; 
We  answer  them,  we  did  not  fear, 
Nor  think  such  Noses  had  been  here : 
But  if  there  be,  we  need  not  care, 
A  Nose  of  Wax  our  Statutes  are. 

Invention  now  is  barren  grown, 

The  Matter's  out,  the  Nose  is  blown. 

262  SONGS  Compleat) 


«y    ^M^T  LS 

STill  I'm  Wishing,  still  desiring, 
Still  She's  giving,  I  requiring  ; 

Yet  each  Gift  I  think  too  small, 
Still  the  more  I  am  presented, 
Still  the  less  I  am  contented  ; 

Tho'  she  Vows  she  has  given  me  all. 

Can  Drusilla  give  no  more  ? 
Has  she  Lavish'd  all  her  Store  ? 

Must  my  Hopes  to  Nothing  fall  ? 
Oh  you  know  not  half  your  Treasure  ; 
Give  me  more,  give  over  Measure, 

Yet  you  can  never,  never  give  me  all. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


On  Doctor  G.  formerly  Master  of  St.  Paul's 

IN  Pauls  Church-yard  in  London^ 
There  dwells  a  noble  Firker ; 
Take  heed  you  that  pass, 
Lest  you  taste  of  his  Lash, 
For  I  have  found  him  a  Jirker  : 
Still  doth  he  cry,  take  him  up,  take  him  up,  Sir, 
Untruss  with  Expedition  \ 
O  the  Birchin  Tool, 
Which  he  winds  i'th'  School, 
Frights  worse  than  an  Inquisition. 

If  that  you  chance  to  pass  there, 
As  doth  the  Man  of  Blacking; 

He  insults  like  Puttock, 

O'er  the  Prey  of  the  Buttock, 
With  a  whipt  Arse  sends  him  packing. 
Still  doth,  &c. 


264  SONGS  Compleat, 

For  when  this  well-truss'd  Trouncer, 
Into  the  School  doth  enter  ; 
With  his  Napkin  at  his  Nose, 
And  his  Orange  stuft  with  Cloves, 
On  any  Arse  he'll  venture. 
Still  doth,  &c. 

A  Frenchman  void  of  English, 
Enquiring  for  PauTs  Steeple  ; 
His  Pardon  amoy 
He  counted  a  Toy, 
For  he  whipt  him  before  all  People. 
Still  doth,  &c. 

A  Welchman  once  was  whipt  there, 
Until  he  did  Beshit  him  ; 
His  Cuds-pluter-a-nail, 
Could  not  prevail, 
For  he  whipt  the  Cambro--5/7/#/;/. 
Still  doth,  &c. 

A  Captain  of  the  Train'd-Band, 
Sirnam'd  Cornelius  Wallis ; 
He  whipt  him  so  sore, 
Both  behind  and  before, 
He  notcht  his  Arse  with  Tallies. 
Still  doth,  &c. 

For  a  piece  of  Beef  and  Turnip, 
Neglected  with  a  Cabbage, 
He  took  up  the  Main  Pillion 
Of  his  bouncing  Maid  Gillian, 
And  sows'd  her  like  a  Baggage. 
Still  doth,  &c. 

A  Porter  came  in  rudely, 

And  disturb'd  the  humming  Concord ; 
He  took  up  his  Frock, 
And  paid  his  Nock, 
And  sows'd  him  with  his  own  Cord, 
Stilt  doth  he  cry,  &c. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



THE  Fire  of  Love  in  Youthful  Blood, 
Like  what  is  kindled  in  brush  Wood, 
But  for  a  Moment  burns  : 
Yet  in  that  Moment  makes  a  mighty  Noise, 

It  crackles,  and  to  Vapours  turns, 
And  soon  it  self,  it  self  destroys, 
And  soon  it  self,  it  self  destroys. 

But  when  crept  into  Aged  Veins, 
It  slowly  burns,  and  long  remains, 

And  with  a  sullen  Heat : 
Like  Fire  in  Logs,  it  glows  and  warms  'em  long, 

And  tho'  the  Flame  be  not  so  great, 
Yet  is  the  Heat,  the  Heat  as  strong, 
Yet  is  the  Heat  the  Heat  as  strong. 


266  SONGS  Compleat, 

An  Excellent  BALLAD,  Intituled,  The 
Wandering  Prince  of  Troy. 

n._^_it_^_it__^   ^i_^      _^_   _^.T 

WHen  7V^  Town  for  Ten  Years  Wars 
Withstood  the  Greeks  in  manful  wise, 
Then  did  their  Foes  increase  so  fast, 
That  to  resist  none  could  suffice  ; 
Waste  lies  those  Walls  that  were  so  good, 
And  Corn  now  grows  where  Troy  Town  stood. 

&neas  wandring  Prince  of  Troy, 

When  he  for  Land  long  time  had  sought, 

At  length  arrived  with  great  Joy, 

To  mighty  Carthage  Walls  was  brought, 

Where  Dido  Queen  with  sumptuous  Feast, 
Did  entertain  this  wandring  Guest. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  267 

And  as  in  Hall  at  Meat  they  sat, 
The  Queen  desirous  News  to  hear, 

Of  thy  unhappy  Ten  Years  Wars 
Declare  to  me,  thou  Trojan  dear, 

Thy  heavy  hap  and  chance  so  bad, 

That  thou  poor  wandring  Prince  hast  had  ? 

And  then  anon  this  worthy  Knight, 
With  words  demure  as  he  could  well, 

Of  his  unhappy  Ten  years  Wars 
So  true  a  Tale  began  to  tell  ? 

With  Words  so  sweet,  and  Sighs  so  deep, 

That  oft  he  made  them  all  to  Weep. 

And  then  a  thousand  Sighs  he  fetch'd, 
And  every  Sigh  brought  Tears  amain, 

That  where  he  sat  the  Place  was  wet, 
As  it  he  had  seen  those  Wars  again  : 

So  that  the  Queen  with  Truth  therefore, 

Said  worthy  Prince  enough,  no  more. 

The  darksome  Night  apace  drew  on, 

And  twinkling  Stars  'i'th'  Sky  were  spread, 

And  he  his  doleful  Tale  had  told, 
As  every  one  lay  in  his  Bed  ; 

Where  they  full  sweetly  took  their  rest, 

Save  only  Didds  boiling  Breast. 

This  silly  Woman  never  slept, 

But  in  her  Chamber  all  alone, 
As  one  unhappy  always  kept, 

Unto  the  Wall  she  made  her  Moan, 
That  she  should  still  desire  in  vain, 
The  thing  that  she  could  not  obtain. 

And  thus  in  Grief  she  spent  the  Night, 

Till  twinkling  Stars  from  the  Skies  were  fled, 

And  Phoebus  with  his  glimmering  Beams 
Thro'  misty  Clouds  appeared  Red : 

Then  Tydings  came  to  her  anon, 

That  all  the  Trojan  Ships  were  gone. 


268  SONGS  Compleat, 

And  then  the  Queen  with  Bloody  Knife 
Did  arm  her  Heart  as  hard  as  Stone, 

Yet  somewhat  loth  to  lose  her  Life, 
In  woful  case  she  made  her  Moan  : 

And  rolling  on  her  careful  Bed, 

With  Sighs  and  Sobs  these  Words  she  said : 

O  wretched  Dido  Queen  !  quoth  she, 

I, see  thy  End  approacheth  near, 
For  he  is  gone  away  from  thee, 

Whom  thou  did'st  Love  and  hold  so  dear  : 
Is  he  then  gone  and  passed  by  ? 
O  Heart  prepare  thy  self  to  die. 

Tho*  Reason  would  thou  should'st  forbear 

To  stop  thy  Hand  from  Bloody  stroak, 
Yet  fancy  said  thou  shoud'st  not  Fear, 
Who  fetter'd  thee  in  Cupid's  Yoak, 
Come  Death,  quoth  she,  and  end  the  Smart, 
And  with  these  Words  she  pierc'd  her  Heart. 

When  Death  had  pierc'd  the  tender  Heart, 

Of  Dido  Carthaginian  Queen, 
And  Bloody  Knife  did  end  the  Smart, 

Which  she  sustained  in  woful  teen  : 
^Eneas  being  Ship'd  and  gone, 
Whose  Flatt'ry  caused  all  her  Moam 

Her  Funeral  most  costly  made, 
And  all  things  finish'd  Mournfully, 

Her  Body  fine  in  Mould  was  laid, 
Where  it  consumed  speedily  : 

Her  Sisters  Tears  her  Tomb  bestrew'd, 

Her  subjects  Grief  her  Kindness  shew'd. 

Then  was  sEneas  in  an  Isle 

In  Grecia,  where  he  liv'd  long  space ; 

Whereas  her  Sister  in  short  time, 
Writ  to  him  to  his  foul  Disgrace  : 

In  phrase  of  Letters  to  her  Mind, 

She  told  him  plain  he  was  Unkind. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  269 

False  hearted  Wretch  (quoth  she)  thou  art, 
And  treacherously  thou  hast  be  tray  'd, 

Unto  thy  Lure  a  gentle  Heart, 

Which  unto  thee  such  Welcome  made  : 

My  Sister  dear,  and  Carthage  Joy, 

Whose  Folly  wrought  her  dire  annoy. 

Yet  on  her  Death-Bed,  when  she  lay, 

She  pray'd  lor  thy  Prosperity, 
Beseeching  God  that  every  Day 

Might  breed  thee  great  Felicity  : 
Thus  by  thy  means  I  lost  a  Friend, 
Heav'ns  send  thee  an  untimely  End. 

When  he  these  Lines  full  fraught  with  Gall, 
Perused  had,  and  weigh'd  them  right? 

His  lofty  Courage  then  did  fall, 
And  straight  appeared  in  his  sight  ? 

Queen  Dido's  Ghost,  both  Grim  and  Pale, 

Which  made  this  valiant  Soldier  Quail. 

&neas,  quoth  this  grisly  Ghost, 

My  whole  delight  while  I  did  live, 
Thee  of  all  Men  I  Loved  most, 

My  Fancy  and  my  Will  did  give  : 
For  Entertainment  I  thee  gave, 
Unthankfully  thou  dig'st  my  Grave. 

Therefore  prepare  thy  fleeting  Soul, 

To  wander  with  me  in  the  Air, 
Where  deadly  Grief  shall  make  it  howl, 

Because  of  me  thou  took'st  no  care  : 
Delay  no  time,  thy  Glass  is  run, 
Thy  Day  is  past,  thy  Death  is  come. 

O  stay  a  while  thou  lovely  Spright, 

Be  not  so  ready  to  convey ; 
My  Soul  into  Eternal  Night, 

Where  it  shall  ne'er  behold  bright  Day, 
O  do  not  frown  ;  thy  angry  look, 
Hath  made  my  Breath  my  Life  forsook. 


2  7o  SONGS  Compleat, 

But  wo  is  me,  it  is  in  vain 
And  bootless  is  my  dismal  Cry, 

Time  will  not  be  recall'd  again, 
Nor  you  surcease  before  I  Die, 

0  let  me  live  to  make  Amends, 
Unto  some  of  thy  dearest  Friends. 

But  seeing  thou  obdurate  art, 
And  will  no  pity  to  me  show, 

Because  from  thee  I  did  depart, 
And  left  unpaid  what  I  did  owe ; 

1  must  content  my  self  to  take, 
What  Lot  thou  wilt  with  me  partake. 

And  like  one  being  in  a  Trance, 
A  multitude  of  ugly  Fiends  : 

About  this  woful  Prince  did  dance, 
No  help  he  had  of  any  Friends  : 

His  Body  then  they  took  away, 

And  no  Man  knew  his  Dying-day. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



BLith  Jockey  Young  and  Gay, 
Is  all  my  Soul's  Delight, 
He's  all  my  Talk  by  Day, 

And  all  my  Dreams  by  Night : 
Jf  from  the  Lad  I  be, 
Tis  Winter  still  with  me, 
But  when  he's  with  me  here, 
'Tis  Summer  all  the  Year. 

I'm  Blith  when  Jockey  comes, 

Sad  when  he  gangs  away, 
'Tis  Night  when  Jockey  Glooms, 
And  if  he  Smiles,  'tis  Day  : 
When  our  Eyes  meet,  I  Pant, 
I  Colour,  Sigh,  or  Faint, 
What  Lass  that  would  be  kind, 
Can  better  tell  her  Mind  ? 

272  SONGS  Compleat, 

0/^;/£-  EDWARD  and  JANE  SHORE. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  273 

WHY  should  we  boast  of  Lais  and  his  Knights, 
Knowing  such  Champions  intrapt  with  Who- 
rish  Lights  : 

Or  why  should  we  speak  of  Thais  Curled  Locks, 
Or  Rhodope  that  gave  so  many  Men  the  Pox. 
Read  old  Stories,  and  there  you  shall  find, 
How  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  pleas'd  King  Ed 
ward's  mind. 

Jane  Shore  she  was  for  fair  England,  Queen  Fredrick 
was  for  France, 

Honi  soit  qui  mal  y  pense. 

To  speak  of  the  Amazons  it  were  too  long  to  tell, 
And  likewise  of  the  Thradan  Girls,  how  far  they  did 

excel ; 

Those  with  Scythian  Lads,  engag'd  in  several  Fights, 
And  in  the  brave  Venetian  Wars,  did  foil  advent'rous 

Knights  : 

Messaline  and  Julia  were  Vessels  wond'rous  brittle, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  took  down  K.  Edward's 


Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Thalestis  of  Thormydon,  she  was  a  doughty  Wight ; 
She  Conquer'd  Pallas  King  in  the  Exercise  of  Night ; 
Hercules  shew  the  Dragon  whose  Teeth  were  all  of  Brass, 
Yet  he  himself  became  a  Slave  unto  the  Lydian  Lass  : 
The  Theban  Semel  lay  with  Jove,  not  dreading  all  his 

But  Jane  Shore  overcame  King  Edward,  altho'  he 

had  her  under. 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Hellen  of  Greece  she  came  of  Spartan  Blood, 
Agruvtas&d  Cressidaihey  were  brave  Whores  and  good  ; 
Queen  Clytemnestra  bold,  slew  old  Arthur's  mighty  Son, 
And  fair  Harcyon  pull'd  down  the  Strength  of  Telamon  : 
Those  were  the  Ladies  that  caus'd  the  Trojan  Sack, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  spoil'd  K.  Edward's 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 
VOL.  iv.  T  For 

274  SONGS  Contpleat, 

For  this  the  Ancient  Fathers  did  great  Venus  defy, 
Because  with  her  own  Father  Jove  she  feared  not  to  lie; 
Hence    Cupid  came,   who   afterwards    reveng'd    his 

loving  Mother, 
And  made  kind  Biblis  do  the  like  with  Carnus  her 

own  Brother ; 

And  afterwards  the  Goddess  kept  Adonis  for  Reserve, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  stretch'd  King  Ed 
ward's  Nerve. 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c, 

The  Colchin  Dame  Mcedea  her  Father  did  betray, 
And  taught  her  Lover  Jason  how  the  Vigilant  Bull  to 


And  after,  thence  conveyed  her  Father's  golden  Fleece, 
She  with  her  Lover  sail'd  away  in  Argus  Ship  to  Greece  : 
But  finding  Jason  False,  she  burnt  his  Wife  and  Court, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  shew'd  King  Edward 


Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c 

Romix  of  Saxony  the  Welsh  State  overthrew, 

Igrceyn  of  Cornwal,  Pendragon  did  subdue  ; 

Queen  Quinniver  with  Arthur  fought  singly  hand  to 

In  Bed,  tho'  afterwards  she  made  Horns  on  his  Head 

to  stand : 

And  to  Sir  Mordred  Pictish  Prince  a  Paramore  became, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  made  King  Edward 


Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Marosia  of  Italy,  see  how  she  stoutly  copes, 

With  Jesuits,  Priests  and  Cardinals,  and  tripple 
Crowned  Popes  ; 

And  with  King  Henry,  Rosamond  spent  many  a  dally 
ing  Hour, 

Till  lastly  she  was  Poisoned  in  Woodstock  fatal  Bower : 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  275 

And  Joan   of    Ark  play'd  in   the   Dark  with   the 

Knights  of  Languedock, 
But  Jane  Shore,  met  King  Edward,  and  gave  him 

Knock  for  Knock. 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Pasipha  we  know  play'd  feats  with  the  Cretan  Bull, 
And  Proserpine,  tho'  so  Divine,  became  black  Pluto's 

Trull : 
The  Spanish  Baud  her  Strumpets  taught  to  lay  their 

Legs  astride,  [deride  : 

But  these  and  all  the  Curtezans  Jane  Shore  did  them 
Pope  Joan  was  right,  altho'  she  did  the  Papal  Scepter 

But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  she  made  King  Edward 


Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Agathoclea  and  sEnathe  did  govern  Egypt's  King  ; 

The  witty  Wench  of  Andover,  she  was  a  pretty  thing, 

She  freely   took   her   Lady's  place,   and   with  great 
Edgar  Dally'd, 

And  with  main  force  she  foil'd  him  quite,  altho'  he 
often  rally 'd  : 

For  which  brave  Act,  he  that  her  rack'd,  gave  her  his 
Lady's  Land, 

But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  King  Edward  did  com 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Of  Phryne  and  Lanva  Historians  have  related, 
How   their   Illustrious   Beauties,   two  Generals    Cap 
tivated  : 
And  they  that  in  the  Days  of  Yore  kill'd  Men  and 

Sack'd  their  Cities, 

In  Honour   of  their   Mistresses  composed  Amorous 

Ditties :  [call'd, 

Let  Flora  gay  with  Romans  play,  and  be  a  Goddess 

But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore,  King  Edward  she  en- 


Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

T  2  The 

276  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Jolly  Tanner's  Daughter  Harlot  of  Normandy, 
She  only  had  the  happiness  to  please  Duke  Robert's 


And  Roxolana  tho'  a  Slave,  and  born  a  Grecian, 
Could  with  a  Nod,  command  and  rule  Grand  Seignior 

Solyman  : 
And    Naples   Joan   would   make   them   Groan   that 

ardently  did  love  her, 
But  Jane  Shore,  Jam  Shore  King  Edward  he  did 

Shove  her. 

Jane  Shore  she  was,  &c. 

Aspatia  doth  of  the  Persian  Brothers  boast, 

Though  Cynthia}^  in  the  Lampathean  ¥>oy ,  Jane  Shore 
shall  rule  the  roast ; 

Cleopatra  lov'd  Mark  Anthony,  and  Brownal  she  did 

But  compar'd  to  our   Virago,  they  were  but  meerly 

Brave  Carpet  Knights  in   Cupid's  Fights,  their  milk- 
white  Rapiers  drew, 

But  Jane  Shore,  Jane  Shore  King  Edward  did  subdue, 

Jane  Shore  she  ivas  for  England,  Queen  Fredrick  was 
for  France, 

Honi  soit  qui  mat  y  pense. 

Hamlet's  incestuous  Mother,  was  Gartrude  Denmark's 

And  Circe  that  enchanting  Witch,  the  like  was  scarcely 

seen  ; 

Warlike  Penthesile  was  an  Amazonian  Whore, 
To  Hector and  young  Iroylus,  both  which  did  her  adore, 
But  brave  King  Edward,  who  before  had  gain'd  Nine 

Was  like  a  Bond-slave,  fetter'd  with  Jane  Shore's  all 

conqu'ring  Thighs  : 
Jane  Shore  she   was  for    England,   Queen    Fredrick 

was  for  France, 

Honi  soit  qui  mal  y  pense. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



LET  the  Soldiers  rejoyce, 
_,  With  a  general  Voice  ; 
And  the  Senate  new  Honour  decree  'em  : 
Who  at  his  Armies  head, 
Struck  the  fell  Monster  dead  ; 
And  so  boldly,  so  boldly,  and  bravely  did  free  'em. 

To  Mass  let  'em  raise, 

And  their  Emperors  praise, 
A  Trophy  of  the  Armies  own  making, 

To  Maximinian  too, 

Some  Honours  are  due  ; 
Who  joyn'd  in  the  brave  undertaking. 

With  Flowers  let  'em  strow, 

The  way  as  they  go  ; 
Their  Statutes  with  Garlands  adorning, 

Who  from  Tyrannous  Knight, 

Drove  the  Mist  from  their  sight ; 
And  gave  'em  a  Glorious  Morning. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

An  Irish  SONG. 
Set  by  Mr.  LEVERIDGE. 




ONE  Sunday  after  Mass,  Dormet  and  his  Lass, 
To  the  Green  Wood  did  pass, 
All  alone,  all  alone,  all  alone,  all  alone, 
He  ask'd  for  one  Pogue,  she  call'd  him  a  Rogue, 
And  struck  him  with  her  Brogue, 

Oh  hone.  Oh  hone,  Oh  hone. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  2  79 

Said  he  my  dear  Joy,  why  will  you  be  Coy, 
Let  us  Play,  let  us  Toy, 

All  alone,  all  alone,  all  alone ; 
If  I  were  too  Mild,  you  are  so  very  Wild, 
You  will  get  me  with  Shild, 

Oh  hone.  Oh  hone,  Oh  hone. 

He  brib'd  her  with  Sloes,  and  brib'd  her  with  Nuts, 
Then  a  Thorn  prick'd  her  Foot, 

Halla  lu,  halla  lu,  halla  lu  ; 
Let  me  pull  it  out,  You'll  hurt  me,  I  doubt, 
And  make  me  to.  shout, 

Halla  lu,  halla  lu  halla  lu. 

Set  by  Mr.  Leveridge. 

W       ~'  ~^^          v  v      j 


SONGS  Compleat, 

WHEN  Cupid  from  his  Mother  fled, 
He  changing  his  shape,  thus  made  his  Escape, 
His  Mother  thought  him  Dead  ; 
Some  did  him  a  kindness,  and  cur'd  him  of  his  Blind 

And  thus  disguis'd  like  me,  thus  disguis'd, 
Thus  disguis'd,  thus  disguis'd  like  me, 
The  little  God,  the  little  God,  the  little  God  cou'd  see. 

He  enters  into  Hearts  of  Men,  and  there  does  spy, 
(Just  so  do  I)  That  falsehood  lurks  within  ; 
That  Sighing  and  Dying,  is  Swearing  and  Lying, 

All  this  disguis'd  like  me, 

The  little  God,  the  little  God  could  see. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  281 




SMiling  Phillis  has  an  Air  so  engaging,  all  Men 
love  her, 

But  her  hidden  Beauties  are  Wonders  I  dare  not  dis 
cover  ; 



SONGS  Compleat, 

So  bewitching,  that  in  vain  I  endeavour  to  forget  her, 
Still  she  brings  me  back  again,  and  I  daily  love  her 

Kindness  springs  within  her  Eyes,  and  from  thence  is 

always  flowing, 
Ev'ry  Minute  does  surprise  with  fresh  Beauties  still  a 

Blowing ; 
Were  she  but  as  true  as  fair,  never  Man  had  such  a 

Treasure,    . 
But  I  die  with  jealouse  Care,  in  the  midst  of  all  my 


Free  and  easie  without  Pride,  in  her  Language  and 

her  Fashion, 
Setting  gentle  Love   aside,   she's  unmov'd  with  any 

Passion  ; 
When  she  says  I  have  her  Heart,  tho'  I  ought  not  to 

believe  her, 
She  so  kindly  plays  her  part,  I  could  be  deceiv'd  for 



Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 

77  TT       S  l-»l-»— tf-P-^^JHi^ 

all  the  Youths  whose  Hearts  have  bled,  by 
cruel  Beauties  Pride, 
Bring  each  a  Garland  on  his  Head,  let  none  his  Sorrows 


But  Hand  in  Hand  around  me  move, 
Singing  the  saddest  Tales  of  Love  : 
And  try  when  your  Complaints  ye  join, 
If  all  your  Wrongs  can  equal  mine. 

The  happiest  Mortal  once  was  I,  my  Heart  no  sorrow 

Pity  the  pain  with  which  I  die,  and  ask  not  whence  it 


Yet  if  a  tempting  Fair  you  find, 
That's  very  Lovely,  very  Kind  : 
Tho'  bright  as  Heav'n,  whose  Stamp  she  bare, 
Think  of  my  Fate,  and  shun  her  Snare. 



SONGS  Compleat, 


?^i_«-_^_  Ip  T^H 1 .    ;— ^^1  -»  — *-  -P^P-^ 

4H  cruel  bloody  Fate,  what  can'st  tho  do  more  ? 
Alas,  'tis  now  too  late  Philander  to  restore  : 
y  should  the  Heav'nly  Powers  perswade,   poor 
Mortals  to  believe, 

That  they  Guard  us  here,  and  reward  us  there,  yet  all 
our  Joys  deceive  ? 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


Her  Ponyard  then  she  took,  and  held  it  in  her  Hand, 
And  with  a  dying  Look,  cry'd,  thus  I  Fate  Command  : 
Philander,  ah,  my  Love  I  came  to  meet  thy  shade 


Ah,  I  come,  she  cry'd,  with  a  Wound  so  wide, 
There  need  no  second  Blow. 

In  Purple  Waves  her  Blood  ran  streaming  down  the 


Unmov'd  she  saw  the  Flood,  and  bless'd  her  dying  hour; 
Philander,  ah,  Philander  still,  the  bleeding  Phillis 

cry'd : 

She  Wept  a  while,  and  she  forc'd  a  Smile, 
Then  clos'd  her  Eyes  and  Dy'd. 


286  SONGS  Compleat, 

Less  Mortals,  bless  the  clearing  Light, 

That  flows  from  Cdia's  Eyes, 
or  never  did  a  Star  so  bright, 
In  Beauty's  Heav'n  rise  : 

And  whilst  a  Crown's  uneasy  weight, 

And  all  the  mighty  Toils  of  State, 

She  softens  with  her  Charms, 

Bless,  bless  the  happy  Monarch  in  her  Arms. 

Who  lives  that  does  not  yield  to  Love, 

And  oft  his  Joys  renew  ; 
And  yet  how  few  in  King's  approve, 
What  they  themselves  pursue. 

The  Murmuring  Crowd  themselves  afford, 
The  pleasures  they  deny  their  Lord, 
Tho'  Love  is  Empire's  Dower, 
To  recompence  the  Slavery  of  Power. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  287 


YOung  Phaon  strove  the  Bliss  to  taste, 
But  Sappho  still  deny'd ; 
She  struggl'd  long,  the  Youth  at  last, 

Lay  panting  by  her  side. 
Useless  he  lay,  Love  would  not  wait, 

Till  they  could  both  agree, 
They  idly  languish'd  in  Debate, 
When  they  should  Active  be. 

At  last,  come  ruin  me,  she  cry'd, 

And  then  there  fell  a  Tear : 
I'll  in  my  Breast  my  Blushes  hide, 

Do  all  that  Virgins  fear. 
O,  that  Age  cou'd  Love's  Rights  perform, 

We  make  Old  Men  obey ; 
They  Court  us  long,  Youth  does  but  storm, 

And  Plunder  and  away. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

A   SONG.     Set  by  Mr.  James  Hart. 

HAppy  is  the  Country  Life, 
Blest  with  Content,  good  Health  and  Ease 
Free  from  Factions,  Noise  and  Strife, 
We  only  Plot  our  selves  to  please  : 
Peace  of  Mind  the  Days  delight, 
And  Love  our  welcome  Dreams  at  Night. 

Hail  green  Fields  and  shady  Woods, 

Hail  Springs  and  Streams  that  still  run  Pure  : 

Nature's  uncorrupted  Goods, 
Where  Vertue  only  is  secure  : 

Free  from  Vice,  here  free  from  Care, 

Age  is  no  pain,  and  Youth  no  Snare. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  289 

An  Unhappy  memorable  SONG,  of  the 
Hunting  in  CHEVY-CHASE,  between  Earl 

GOD  prosper  long  our  Noble  King, 
Our  Lives  and  Safeties  all, 
A  woful  Hunting  once  there  did, 
In  Chevy-Chase 

To  drive  the  Deer  with  Hound  and  Horn, 

Earl  Piercy  took  his  way  : 
The  Child  may  rue  that  is  unborn, 

The  Hunting  of  that  Day  : 

The  stout  Earl  of  Northumberland, 

A  Vow  to  God  did  make, 
His  Pleasure  in  the  Scottish  Woods, 

Three  Summers  Days  to  take  : 

The  chiefest  Harts  in  Chevy-Chace, 

To  kill  and  bear  away  ; 
The  Tydings  to  Earl  Dowglas  came, 

In  Scotland  where  he  lay  ; 
VOL.  iv.  u  Who 

2  go  SONGS  Compleat, 

Who  sent  Earl  Piercy  present  Word, 

He  would  prevent  his  Sport : 
The  English  Earl  not  fearing  this, 

Did  to  the  Wood  resort, 

With  Fifteen  Hundred  Bow-men  bold, 

All  chosen  Men  of  Might ; 
Who  knew  full  well  in  time  of  need, 

To  aim  their  Shafts  aright : 

The  gallant  Grey-hounds  swiftly  ran, 

To  chace  the  Fallow  Deer ; 
On  Munday  they  began  to  Hunt, 

When  Day-light  did  appear  : 

And  long  before  High-noon  they  had, 

A  Hundred  fat  Bucks  slain  ; 
Then  having  Din'd,  the  Drover  went, 

To  rouse  them  up  again  : 

The  Bow-men  must'red  on  the  Hills, 

Well  able  to  endure  ; 
Their  back-sides  all  with  special  care, 

That  Day  was  guarded  sure  : 

The  Hounds  ran  swiftly  thro'  the  Woods 

The  nimble  Deer  to  take  ; 
And  with  their  cries  the  Hills  and  Dales, 

An  Eccho  shrill  did  make  : 

Lord  Piercy  to  the  Quarry  went, 

To  view  the  tender  Deer, 
Quoth  the  Earl  Dowglas  promised, 

This  Day  to  meet  me  here  : 

If  that  I  thought  he  would  not  come, 

No  longer  would  I  stay  ; 
With  that  a  brave  young  Gentleman, 

Thus  to  the  Earl  did  say  : 

i  Lo 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  291 

Lo  yonder  doth  Earl  Dowglas  come, 

His  Men  in  Armour  bright ; 
Full  Twenty  Hundred  Scottish  Spears, 

All  marching  in  our  Sight : 

All  Men  of  pleasant  Tividale, 

Fast  by  the  River  Tweed; 
Then  cease  your  Sport,  Earl  Piercy  said, 

And  take  your  Bows  with  speed : 

And  now  with  me  my  Country-men, 

Your  Courage  forth  Advance  ; 
For  never  was  there  Champion  yet, 

In  Scotland  or  in  France ; 

That  ever  did  on  Horse-back  come, 

But  since  my  Hap  it  were ; 
I  durst  Encounter  Man  for  Man, 

With  him  to  break  a  Spear  : 

Earl  Dowglas  on  a  Milk-white  Steed, 

Most  like  a  Baron  Bold  ; 
Rode  foremost  of  the  Company, 

Whose  Armour  shone  like  Gold  : 

Shew  me  (said  he)  whose  Men  you  be, 

That  Hunt  so  boldly  here ; 
That  without  my  Consent  do  Chase, 

And  kill  my  Fallow  Deer  : 

The  Man  that  first  did  Answer  make, 

Was  noble  Piercy  he ; 
Who  said  we  list  not  to  declare, 

Nor  shew  whose  Men  we  be  ; 

Yet  we  will  spend  our  dearest  Blood, 

Thy  chiefest  Harts  to  slay  ; 
Then  Dowglas  swore  a  solemn  Oath, 

And  thus  in  Rage  did  say  : 

u  2  E'ei 

292  SONGS  Compleat, 

E'er  thus  I  will  out-braved  be, 

One  of  us  two  shall  die ; 
I  know  thee  well,  an  Earl  thou  art, 

Lord  Piercy,  so  am  I. 

But  trust  me  Piercy,  pity  it  were, 

And  great  offence  to  kill, 
Any  of  these  our  harmless  Men, 

For  they  have  done  no  ill : 

Let  thou  and  I  the  Battle  try, 

And  set  our  Men  aside, 
Accurst  be  he,  Lord  Piercy  said, 

By  whom  it  is  deny'd. 

Then  step'd  a  gallant  Squire  forth, 

Witherington  was  his  Name  ; 
Who  said  I  would  not  have  it  told, 
To  Henry  our  King  for  shame  : 

That  e'er  my  Captain  fought  on  Foot, 

And  I  stood  looking  on  ; 
You  be  two  Earls  said  Witherington, 

And  I  a  'Squire  alone  : 

I'll  do  the  best  that  do  I  may, 
While  I  have  Power  to  stand  : 

While  I  have  Power  to  wield  my  Sword, 
I'll  fight  with  Heart  and  Hand. 

Our  English  Archers  bent  their  Bows, 
Their  Hearts  were  good  and  true  ; 

At  the  first  Flight  of  Arrows  sent, 
Full  Threescore  Scots  they  slew. 

To  drive  the  Deer  with  Hound  and  Horn, 

Earl  Dowglas  had  the  Bent : 
A  Captain  mov'd  with  mickle  Pride, 

The  Spears  to  Shivers  sent : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  293 

They  clos'd  full  fast  on  every  side, 

No  slackness  there  was  found  ; 
And  many  a  gallant  Gentleman, 

Lay  Gasping  on  the  Ground  : 

O  Christ !  it  was  a  Grief  to  see, 

And  likewise  for  to  hear, 
The  cries  of  Men  lying  in  their  Gore, 

And  scatter'd  here  and  there  : 

At  last  these  two  stout  Earls  did  meet, 

Like  Captains  of  great  Might ; 
Like  Lions  mov'd  they  laid  on  load, 

And  made  a  cruel  fight ; 

They  Fought  until  they  both  did  Sweat, 

With  Swoids  of  tempered  Steel  : 
Until  the  Blood  like  drops  of  Rain, 

They  trickling  down  did  fall. 

Yield  thee,  Lord  Piercy,  Dowglas  said, 

In  Faith  I  will  thee  bring, 
Where  thou  shalt  high  advanced  be, 

By  James  our  Scotish  King  : 

Thy  Ransom  I  will  freely  give, 

And  thus  Report  of  thee  ; 
Thou  art  the  most  Couragious  Knight, 

That  ever  I  did  see. 

To  Dowglas,  quoth  Earl  Piercy  then, 

Thy  proffer  I  do  scorn  ; 
I  will  not  yield  to  any  Scot, 

That  ever  yet  was  born. 

With  that  there  came  an  Arrow  keen, 

Out  of  an  English  Bow  ; 
Which  struck  Earl  Dowglas  to  the  Heart, 

A  deep  and  deadly  Blow. 


294  SONGS  Compleat, 

Who  never  spoke  more  Words  than  these, 

Fight  on  my  merry  Men  all ; 
For  why,  my  Life  is  at  an  end, 

Lord  Piercy  sees  my  fall. 

Then  leaving  Life,  Earl  Piercy  took, 

The  dead  Man  by  the  Hand ; 
And  said  Earl  Dowglas  for  thy  Life, 

Would  I  had  lost  my  Land. 

Oh  Christ !  my  very  Heart  doth  bleed, 

With  sorrow  for  thy  Sake  ; 
For  sure  a  more  renowned  Knight, 

Mischance  did  never  take. 

f  A  Knight  amongst  the  Scots  there  was, 

Which  saw  Earl  Dowglas  die  : 
Who  straight  in  Wrath  did  vow  Revenge 
Upon  the  Earl  Piercy; 

Sir  Hugh  Montgomery,  was  he  call'd, 
Who  with  a  Spear  most  bright, 

Well  Mounted  on  a  gallant  Steed, 
Ran  fiercely  thro'  the  Fight : 

And  past  the  English  Archers  all, 

Without  all  Dread  or  Fear ; 
And  thro'  Earl  Piercy 's  Body  then, 
He  thrust  his  hateful  Spear  : 

With  such  a  vehement  Force  and  Might, 

He  did  his  Body  gore ; 
The  Spear  ran  thro'  the  other  side, 

A  large  Cloth- Yard  and  more. 

So  thus  did  both  those  Nobles  die, 
Whose  Courage  none  could  stain, 

An  English  Archer  then  perceiv'd, 
The  Noble  Earl  was  Slain  : 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  295 

He  had  a  Bow  bent  in  his  Hand, 

Made  of  a  trusty  Tree  : 
An  Arrow  of  a  Cloth  Yard  long, 

Unto  the  Head  drew  he  : 

Against  Sir  Hugh  Montgomery, 

So  right  his  Shaft  he  set ; 
The  Grey-goose  Wing  that  was  thereon, 

In  his  Hearts  Blood  was  wet. 

This  Fight  did  last  from  break  of  Day, 

Till  Setting  of  the  Sun  ; 
For  when  they  rung  the  Evening  Bell, 

The  Battle  scarce  was  done. 

With  the  Earl  Piercy  there  was  slain, 

Sir  John  of  Ogerton, 
Sir  Robert  Ratdiff,  and  Sir  John, 

Sir  James  that  bold  Baron  : 

And  with  Sir  George  and  good  Sir  James, 

Both  Knights  of  good  Account ; 
Good  Sir  Ralph  Rabby  there  was  slain, 

Whose  Prowess  did  surmount : 

For  Witherington  needs  must  I  wail, 

As  one  in  doleful  dumps  \ 
For  when  his  Legs  were  smitten  off, 

He  Fought  upon  his  Stumps. 

And  with  Earl  Dowglas  there  was  slain, 

Sir  Hugh  Montgomery  ; 
Sir  Charles  Currel,  that  from  the  Field 

One  Foot  would  never  fly. 

Sir  Charles  Murrel  of  Ratdiff  too, 

His  Sister's  Son  was  he ; 
Sir  David  Lamb  so  well  esteem'd, 

Yet  saved  could  not  be. 


296  SONGS  Compleat, 

And  the  Lord  Markwel  in  likewise, 

Did  with  Earl  Dowglas  dye  ; 
Of  Twenty  Hundred  Scottish  Spears, 

Scarce  Fifty  Five  did  fly. 

Of  Fifteen  Hundred  English  Men, 

Went  home  but  Fifty  three  ; 
The  rest  were  slain  in  Chevy-Chase, 

Under  the  Green  Wood  Tree. 

Next  Day  did  many  Widows  come, 

Their  Husbands  to  bewail, 
They  wash'd  their  Wounds  in  brinish  Tears, 

But  all  would  not  prevail. 

Their  Bodies  bath'd  in  Purple  Blood, 

They  bore  with  them  away ; 
They  kiss'd  them  dead  a  Thousand  Times, 

When  they  were  clad  in  Clay. 

This  News  was  brought  to  Edinborough, 
Where  Scotland's  King  did  Reign  ; 

That  brave  Earl  Douglas  suddenly, 
Was  with  an  Arrow  Slain. 

0  heavy  News,  King  James  did  say, 
Scotland  can  witness  be  ; 

1  have  not  any  Captain  more, 

Of  such  Account  as  he  : 

Like  Tydings  to  King  Henry  came, 

Within  as  short  a  space  ; 
That  Piercy  of  Northumberland, 

Was  slain  in  Chevy-Chase. 

Now  God  be  with  him  said  our  King, 

Sith  'twill  no  better  be ; 
I  trust  I  have  within  my  Realm 

Five  Hundred  as  good  as  he. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  297 

Yet  shall  not  Scot  or  Scotland  say, 

But  I  will  Vengeance  take ; 
And  be  Revenged  on  them  all, 

For  brave  Lord  Piercfs  sake. 

This  Vow  full  well  the  King  perform'd, 

After  one  Humble-down ; 
In  one  Day  Fifty  Knights  were  Slain, 

With  Lords  of  great  Renown. 

And  of  the  rest  of  small  account, 

Did  many  Hundreds  Die, 
Thus  ended  the  Hunting  of  Chevy-Chase, 

Made  by  the  Earl  Piercy. 

God  save  the  King,  and  bless  the  Land, 

In  Plenty,  Joy,  and  Peace  ; 
And  grant  henceforth  that  foul  Debate, 

Twixt  Noble  Men  may  cease. 

A  Cure  for  the  Green-Sickness  Maid. 

, -g-rg-J'-^PT  -jL^L*$-_p_  . 

298  SONGS  Compleat, 

AS  fair  Olinda  sitting  was, 
Beneath  a  shady  Tree  ; 
Much  Love  I  did  profess  to  her, 

And  she  the  like  to  me  : 
But  when  I  kiss'd  her  lovely  Lips, 

And  prest  her  to  be  kind  : 
She  cry'd,  Oh  no,  but  I  remember, 
Womens  Words  are  Wind. 

I  hugg'd  her  till  her  Breath  grew  short, 

Then  farther  did  intrude  ; 
She  scratch'd  and  struggl'd  modestly, 

And  told  me  I  was  rude : 
I  begg'd  her  pardon  Twenty  times, 

And  some  Concern  did  feign  ; 
But  like  a  bold  presumptuous  Sinner, 

Did  the  like  again. 

At  last  I  did  by  dalliance  raise, 
The  pretty  Nymph's  desire  ; 

Our  Inclinations  equal  were, 

•  And  mutual  was  our  fire  : 

Then  in  the  height  of  joy  she  cry'd, 
Oh  !  I'm  undone  I  fear ; 

Oh  !  kill  me,  stick  me,  stick  me, 
Kill  me,  kill  me  quite  my  dear. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  299 

Set  by  Mr.  James  Hart. 

TV  T  OW  ev'ry  Place  fresh  Pleasure  yields, 
]^^      Let  all  our  Appetites  be  free  ; 
Let  us  enjoy  the  Verdant  Fields, 
This  is  Dame  Nature's  Jubilee. 

With  Garlands  made  of  sweetest  Flow'rs, 
Our  Temples  bound,  we'll  Dance  and  Sing ; 

So  blithly  will  we  pass  the  Hours, 
As  to  promote  the  growing  Spring. 

The  Sylvian  Gods  the  Nymphs  and  Fawns } 
Shall  to  our  Chorus  join  their  Voice ; 

The  Woods,  the  Streams,  the  Hills  and  Lawns, 
Loudly  in  Ecchoes  shall  rejoyce. 


300  SONGS  Compleat, 



Pleasant  and  Diver  tive. 


'  the  Pride  of  my  Passion  fair  Sylvia  betrays, 
_       And  frowns  at  the  Love  I  impart ; 
Tho'  kindly  her  Eyes  twist  numerous  Rays, 

To  tye  a  poor  fortunate  Heart : 
Yet  her  Charms  are  so  great,  I'll  be  bold  in  my  Pain, 
His  Heart  is  too  tender,  too  tender,  that's  struck  with 

Still  my  Heart  is  so  just  to  my  Passionate  Eyes, 
It  dissolves  with  Delight  while  I  gaze ; 

And  he  that  loves  on,  tho'  Sylvia  denies, 
His  Love  but  his  Duty  obeys  : 

I  no  more  can  refrain  her  Neglects  to  pursue, 
Than  the  force,  the  force 

Of  her  Beauty  can  cease  to  subdue. 

£02  SONGS  Compleat, 

GO  tell  Amintor  gentle  Swain, 
I  would  not  die,  nor  dare  complain ; 
Thy  tuneful  Voice  with  Numbers  join, 
Thy  Voice  will  more  prevail  than  mine  : 
For  Souls  oppress'd  and  drown'd  with  Grief, 
The  Gods  ordain'd  this  kind  Relief; 
That  Musick  should  in  sounds  convey, 
What  dying  Lovers  dare  not  say. 

A  Sigh  or  Tear  perhaps  she'd  give, 
But  Love  on  Pity  cannot  live ; 
Tell  her  that  Hearts  for  Hearts  were  made, 
And  Love  with  Love  is  only  paid  : 
Tell  her  my  pains  so  fast  encrease, 
That  soon  they  will  be  past  Redress ; 
For  ah  !  the  Wretch  that  speechless  lies, 
Attends  but  Death  to  close  his  Eyes. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 




I  lik'< 

Never  saw  a  Face  till  now, 

That  could  my  Passion  move  ; 
I  lik'd  and  ventur'd  many  a  Vow, 

But  durst  not  think  of  Love  : 
Till  Beauty  charming  ev'ry  Sense, 

An  easie  Conquest  made  ; 
And  shew'd  the  vainess  of  Defence, 
When  Phillis  does  Invade. 

But  ah  !  her  colder  Heart  denies. 

The  Thoughts  her  Looks  Inspire ; 
And  while  in  Ice  that  frozen  lies, 

Her  Eyes  dart  only  Fire  : 
Between  Extreams  I  am  undone, 

Like  Plants  to  Northward  set ; 
Burnt  by  too  violent  a  Sun, 

Or  Cold,  for  want  of  Heat. 


SONGS  Compleat) 

i    I     i>      irjrr,.?     _ gqrf  zzpifrtrprn: 

^Egzz^r^^z  ^fe££=trff 

"T^Ancelia's  Heart  is  still  the  same, 

J7^    Hard  and  Cold  as  Winter's  Morning, 

Tho'  my  Love  is  ever  burning ; 

Yet  no  Frowns  or  Smiles  can  ever 

Melt  her  Ice,  or  cool  my  Fever, 

Melt  her  Ice,  or  cool  my  Fever. 

So  long  I  talk  and  think  of  Love, 

All  the  Groves  and  Streams  can  Name  her  ; 

All  the  Nymphs  and  Ecchoes  blame  her, 

If  she  keeps  her  cruel  Fashion, 

Nought  but  Death  can  ease  my  Passion. 

Of  all  the  Charms  that  Lovers  have, 
All  the  Sighs,  the  Groans,  the  Anguish, 
All  the  Looks  with  which  I  languish  • 
Moves  not  her  to  any  Feeling, 
Beauty  takes  Delight  in  Killing. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



FLY  from  Olinda  Young  and  Fair, 
Fly  from  her  soft  engaging  Air, 
And  Wit  in  Woman  found  so  rare ; 
Tho'  all  her  Looks  to  Love  advise, 
His  yet  unconquer'd  Heart  denies, 
And  breaks  the  Promise  of  her  Eyes. 

Waste  not  your  Youth  in  Coy  disdain, 
Hope  not  your  Beauty's  pleasing  Reign, 
By  ways  of  Rigour  to  maintain  ; 
If  we  to  Kings  Obedience  owe, 
Or  to  the  Gods  with  Incense  go, 
Tis  for  the  Blessing  they  bestow. 

VOL.  IV. 


SONGS  Compleat, 


ALL  my  past  Life  is  mine  no  more, 
The  flying  Hours  are  gone, 
Like  transitory  Dreams  giv'n  o'er, 
Whose  Images  are  kept  in  store, 
By  Memory  alone. 

Whatever  is  to  come  is  not, 
How  can  it  then  be  mine  ? 

The  present  Moment's  all  my  Lot, 

And  that  as  fast  as  it  is  got, 
Phillis  is  only  thine. 

Then  talk  not  of  Inconstancy, 
False  Hearts  and  broken  Vows  ; 

If  I  by  Miracle  can  be, 

This  long-liv'd  Minute  true  to  thee, 
It's  all  that  Heav'n  allows. 

Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  307 


WHEN  I  see  my  Strephon  languish, 
With  Luanda's  Charms  opprest ; 
When  I  see  his  Pain  and  Anguish, 

Pity  moves  my  tender  Breast  : 
Sighs  so  oft,  and  Tears  so  moving, 
Who  can  see  and  hold  from  Loving. 
Sighs  so  off,  &c. 

Strephon's  plain  and  humble  Nature, 

Mov'd  me  first  to  hear  his  Tale  ; 
Strep/ion's  Truth  by  ev'ry  Creature, 

Is  proclaim'd  through  all  the  Vale  : 
There's  not  a  Nymph  that  wou'cl  not  chuse  him, 
Why  should  I  alone  refuse  him  ? 

there's  not,  &c. 

x  2  A 


SONGS  Compleat, 

A  SONG.     Set  by  Capt.  PACK. 

T  N  vain  she  frowns,  in  vain  she  trys 

J^    The  Darts  of  her  disdainful  Eyes  ; 
She  still  is  Charming,  still  is  Fair, 
And  must  Love,  tho'  I  Despair  : 
Nor  can  I  of  my  Fate  complain,  or  her  Disdain, 
Who  would  not  die,  to  be  so  sweetly  slain. 

Like  those  who  Magick  Spells  employ, 

At  distance  wounds  and  does  destroy ; 

She  kills  with  her  severe  disdain, 

And  absent  I  endure  the  pain  : 

But  spare,  O  spare  your  Cruel  Art !  The  Fatal  Dart 

Stabs  your  own  Image  in  your  Lover's  Heart 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  309 

A   SONG. 

!___._    *_^IL^_J 

V  *  v_f      »  C>       • 

LOvely  Laurinda  !  blame  not  me, 
If  on  your  Beauteous  Looks  I  gaze  ; 
How  can  I  help  it,  when  I  see 

Something  so  charming  in  your  Face  ! 
That  like  a  bright  unclouded  Sky, 

When  in  the  Air  the  Sun-beams  play  ; 
It  ravishes  my  wandring  Eye, 
And  warms  me  with  a  pleasing  Ray. 


3io  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  Pilgrim.      Tune  by  Mr.  John  Barrett. 

End  with  the 
First  Strain. 

OH  !  happy,  happy  Groves,  Witness  of  our  tender 
loves ; 

Oh  !  happy,  happy  shade,  where  first  our  Vows  were 

Blushing,  Sighing,  Melting,  Dying,  Looks  would  charm 

a  Jove ; 

A  Thousand  pretty  things  she  said  and  all  was  Love  : 
But  Corinna  perjur'd  proves,  and  forsakes  the  shady 

Groves ; 

When  I  speak  of  mutual  Joys,  she  knows  not  what 

I  mean, 

Wanton  Glances,  fond  Caresses,  now  no  more  are  seen 
Since  the  false  deluding  Fair  left  the  flowry  Green. 

Mourn  ye  Nymphs  that  sporting  play'd,  where  poor 

Strephon  was  betray'd, 
There  the  secret  Wound  she  gave,  when  I  was  made 

her  Slave, 


Pleasant  and  Diver  five. 

PILLYCOCK.     Set  by  Mr.  Tho.  Wroth. 

Plllycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Toe, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  go ; 
Had  he  Feet, 
Ay  marry  had  he  ? 
And  did  he  go, 
Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright  and  ready  to  fight. 
And  Pillycock  he  lay  there  all  Night. 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Heel, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  feel ; 

Had  he  Hands, 

Ay  marry  had  he  ? 

And  did  he  feel, 

Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bold  upright ',  &c. 

312  SONGS  Compleat, 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  shin, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  grin  ; 

Had  he  Teeth, 

Ay  marry  had  he  ? 

And  did  he  grin, 

Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright,  &c. 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Knee, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  see ; 

Had  he  Eyes, 

Ay  marry  had  he  ? 

And  did  he  see, 

Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright,  &c. 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Thigh, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  fly ; 

Had  he  WTings, 

Ay  marry  had  he  ? 

And  did  he  fly, 

Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright,  &c. 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's 

And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  hunt ; 

Had  he  Hounds, 

Ay  marry  had  he  ? 

And  did  he  Hunt, 

Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright,  &c. 

Pillycock  came  to  my  Lady's  Quilt, 
And  there  the  Whoreson  began  to  Tilt ; 
Had  he  a  Lance, 
Ay  marry  had  he  ? 
And  did  he  Tilt, 
Ay  marry  did  he  ? 
So  bolt  upright  and  ready  to  fight, 
Pillycock  he  lay  there  all  Night. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

STREPHON  and  CHLORIS  :  Or,  the  Coy 
Shepherd  and  kind  Shepherdess. 

He's  fearful  that  his  Flocks  should  go  astray. 
And  from  her  kind  Embraces  would  away; 
But  she  with  Charms  doth  him  so  fetter, 
That  for  to  stay  he  finds  it  is  better  : 
When  Flocks,  and  Herds,  and  Concerns  do  fail, 
Love  must  be  satisfied,  and  will  prevail. 


i  I*  P-0-\ ==^ — l^-i r    T^ — ^~i — I- — T^T 


3 T  4  SONGS  Compleat, 

A   H !   Chloris  awake, 
J-\^     It  is  all  abroad  Day, 
If  you  Sleep  any  longer, 

Our  Flocks  they  will  stray. 
Lye  still,  my  dear  Shepherd, 

And  do  not  rise  yet, 
'Tis  a  cold  windy  Morning, 

And  besides  it  is  wet. 

My  Chloris  make  haste, 

For  it  is  no  such  thing, 
Our  Time  we  do  waste, 

For  the  Lark  is  on  Wing ; 
Besides  I  do  fancy, 

I  hear  the  young  Lambs, 
Cry,  Baa,  baa,  baa,  baa, 

For  the  loss  of  their  Dams. 

My  Shepherd  I  come, 

Though  I'm  all  over  Sorrow ; 
But  I  swear  I'll  not  love  you, 

If  you  rise  so  to  Morrow  : 
For  methinks  'tis  unkind, 

Thus  early  to  rise, 
And  not  bid  me  good  Morrow, 

Brings  Tears  from  my  Eyes. 

Oh  !  hark  my  dear  Chloris, 

Before  thou  shalt  Weep; 
I'll  stay  to  embrace  thee, 

Neglecting  my  Sheep  : 
My  Flocks  they  may  wander, 

One  Hour,  Two,  or  Three  : 
But  if  I  lose  thy  Favour, 

1  ruin'd  shall  be. 

I  joy  my  dear  Shepherd, 

To  hear  thee  say  so  ; 
It  eases  my  Heart  of 

Much  Sorrow  and  Woe  : 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  315 

And  for  thy  Reward, 

I  will  give  thee  a  Kiss  ; 
And  then  thou  shalt  taste, 

Of  a  true  Lover's  Bliss. 

But  Chloris  behold  now, 

Bright  Phcebus  his  Beams, 
Invites  us  to  go 

To  the  murmuring  Streams  ? 
I  hear  the  brave  Huntsmen  ; 

Doth  follow  the  cry  : 
And  make  the  Woods  ring, 

Yet  how  Sluggish  am  I. 

The  Hounds  and  the  Huntsmen 

May  follow  the  Chace  ; 
Whilst  we  enjoy  Pleasure, 

In  a  far  better  Place : 
Thou  know'st  my  dear  Shepherd, 

There  is  no  Delight ; 
Like  Lovers  Enjoyment, 

From  Morning  till  Night. 

Alas !  my  dear  Chloris, 

What  dost  thou  require  ; 
The  Care  of  my  Flocks 

Doth  abate  my  Desire  : 
The  Lambs  are  new  Yeaned, 

And  tender  for  Prey  ; 
And  I  fear  the  sly  Wolf, 

He  should  bear  them  away. 

My  Love  do  not  fear  it, 

The  Wolf  he  is  fled, 
To  take  up  his  Lodging, 

In  his  mossy  Bed. 
Then  let  me  embrace  thee, 

Whilst  we  do  agree ; 
And  I  do  promise  to  go, 

Thou  shalt  after  be  free. 


3 1 6  SONGS  Compleat, 

Ah  !   Chloris,  thy  Words, 

Are  so  powerful  to  me  ; 
That  I  could  be  willing, 

To  tarry  with  thee ; 
Therefore  to  content  thee, 

One  Hour  I  will  stay, 
But  I  vow,  by  God  Cupid, 

I  will  then  go  away. 

Now  I  have  my  Wishes, 

Dear  Shepherd  we'll  part ; 
Altho'  thou  dost  carry, 

Away  my  poor  Heart : 
I  bless  the  great  Gods, 

That  to  Lovers  are  kind ; 
To  bring  us  together, 

Such  bliss  for  to  find. 

Then  farewel  dear  Chloris, 

Till  I  see  thee  again, 
For  now  1  will  haste  to 

My  Flocks  on  the  Plain  : 
Where  I  will  record, 

Thy  true  Love  in  such  Rhimes  ; 
For  Shepherds  to  admire, 

In  succeeding  times. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 

The  long  VOCATION  :  Or,  a  New   Touch  of 
the    Times :   With  the  Comical  Humours 
of  NEW   BETHLEM,   Dr.    TROTTER,    the 
never    born   Doctor,   and     the    Mustek- 
House^  &c. 


N  the  long  Vocation, 
When  Business  was  scanty, 
t  Cherries,  and  Whores, 
Extraordinary  Plenty. 

When  News  came  to  England^ 
The  best  e'er  was  known, 

All  our  Armies  Victorious, 
The  French  overthrown. 

When  Quality  withdrew 

To  their  Grotto's  of  Pleasure, 

And  Ladies  to  the  Wells, 

To  spend  their  Lord's  Treasure. 

When  decripped  old  Sinners, 

To  the  Bath  did  resort, 
For  venereal  Distempers, 

As  well  as  the  Sport. 


3 1 8  SONGS  Compleat, 

When  the  Red  Robe  was  gone, 

To  the  Country  Assizes, 
And  Butchers,  and  Carmen, 

Were  fighting  of  Prizes. 

When  Orthodox  also, 

From  the  Pulpit  did  roar ; 
Twas  the  Sins  of  the  Nation, 

Maid  our  Taxes  so  sore. 

When  young  Golden  Captains, 

Did  walk  the  Parade  ; 
But  a  draught  once  in  motion, 

Were  always  afraid. 

When  the  Cits  did  retire, 

To  their  Country- Houses  ; 
Leaving  Servants  at  home, 

To  lye  with  their  Spouses. 

When  Wives  too  would  junket, 
While  their  Cuckolds  did  sleep  : 

And  spend  more  in  a  Night, 
Then  they  got  in  a  Week. 

When  high  topping  Merchants, 

VVere  daily  beset ; 
And  Statutes  of  Bankrupts, 

Fill'd  half  our  Gazet. 

When  Lawyers  had  not  Money, 

Nor  Shop-keepers  Trade  ; 
And  our  Nation  preparing 

Another  to  invade. 

When  the  Season  was  to  hot, 

For  the  goggle  ey'd  Jews  ; 
To  exercise  their  Faculties, 

In  Drury-Lane  Stews. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  five.  3 1 9 

When  Inns  of  Court-Rakes, 

And  Quill-driving  Prigs, 
Flock'd  to  St.  James's, 

To  shew  their  long  Whiggs. 

When  Sodomites  were  so  impudent, 

To  ply  on  the  Exchange; 
And  by  Day-light  the  Piazza's 

Of  Covent-Garden  to  range. 

When  the  Theatre  Jilts, 

Would  S — ve  for  a  Crown ; 
And  for  want  of  brisk  Trading, 

Patrol'd  round  the  Town. 

When  Debauches  of  both  Sexes, 

From  Hospitals  crept ; 
Where  Nine  Months  at  least, 

In  Flannel  they  slept. 

When  Drapers  smugg'd  Prentices, 
With  Exchange  Girls  most  jolly ; 

After  Shop  was  shut  up, 
Could  Sail  to  the  Folly. 

When  the  Amorous  Thimberkins, 

In  Pater-noster-Row  ; 
With  their  Sparks  on  an  Evening, 

Could  Coach  it  to  Bow. 

When  Poets  and  Players, 

Were  so  damnable  poor  ; 
That  a  Three-penny  Ordinary, 

They  often  would  Score. 

When  De  Foe  and  the  Devil, 

At  Leap-Frog  did  play ; 
And  huffing  proud  Vintners, 

Broke  every  Day. 


320  SONGS  Compleat, 

When  Chamber-maids  dress'd, 

In  their  Mistresses  Cloaths ; 
Walk'd  in  ail  Publick  places, 

To  Ogle  the  Beaus. 

When  Tally-men  had  no  Faith, 
With  Strumpets  and  Whores  ; 

But  nap'd  them  in  the  Streets, 
By  Dozens  and  Scores. 

When  Informers  were  Rogues, 

And  took  double  pay ; 
Much  worse  than  the  Persons, 

They  are  hir'd  to  betray. 

When  Serjeants  were  so  vigilant, 
'Twas  impossible  to  shame  'em  ; 

But  whip  see  Jethro\  immediately, 
G Eternally  D 'em. 

When  Brewers  to  the  Victuallers 

Was  so  cursed  severe, 
They  scarce  would  give  Credit, 

For  a  Barrel  of  Beer. 

Thus  is  it  not  evident, 

Tap-lashes  don't  thrive ; 
Since  they  swarm  in  most  Prisons, 

Like  Bees  in  a  Hive  ? 

But  you  Blue  Apron  Tribe, 

Let  this  caution  prevail ; 
Be  not  too  Saucy, 

Lest  you  Rot  in  a  Goal. 

At  this  Juncture  of  time, 

I  strol'd  to  Moor- Fields; 
Much  us'd  by  the  Mob, 

To  exercise  their  Heels. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  321 

Also  fam'd  for  a  Conjurer, 

The  Devil's  head  Proctor  • 
Where  a  little  below  him, 

Dwells  the  never  born  Doctor, 

Two  such  Impudent  Rascals, 

For  Lying  and  Prating  ; 
That  the  Series  of  their  Lives, 

Is  not  worth  my  Relating. 

My  Pockets  being  lin'd  well, 

With  Rhino  good  store  ; 
And  Inclinations  much  bent, 

After  a  thing  calFd  a  Whore. 

To  gratifie  my  Lust, 

I  went  to  the  Star  ; 
Where  immediately  I  espy'd, 

A  Whore  in  the  Bar. 

Whose  Phiz  was  most  charming, 

And  as  demure  as  a  Saint ; 
But  con ly  bedaub'd, 

With  Patches  and  Paint. 

Sweet  Lady,  cry'd  I, 

I  vow  and  protest ; 
The  Sight  of  your  Charms, 

Have  so  wounded  my  Breast. 

That  I  am  downright  in  Love, 

And  my  Life  shall  Destroy ; 
If  you  do  not  admit  me, 

Your  Favour  to  enjoy. 

Cringing  in  her  A 

The  B then  reply'd ; 

My  favour,  kind  Sir, 

Shall  never  be  deny'd. 

VOL.  iv.  Y  Will 

322  SONGS  Compleat, 

Will  you  please  to  walk  up, 

Or  be  private  below ; 
Here  Boy,  with  a  Bed  in't, 

The  Gentleman  show. 

Then  backwards  we  went, 

To  a  Cavern  behind ; 
But  such  an  intricate  Place, 

The  Devil  could  not  find. 

Where  Wine  being  brought, 
And  the  Fellow  withdrawn  ; 

I  carest  her  with  Love, 
She  made  a  return. 

No  Pigs  in  a  Stye, 

Or  Goats  in  Bad  Weather ; 

E'er  nussl'd  so  close, 

Or  more  Amorous  together. 

We  Kiss'd  and  we  bill'd, 

We  tickled  and  toy'd  ; 
And  more  than  once, 

Our  selves  we  Enjoy'd. 

But  the  Reckoning  grew  high, 

Which  would  make  my  Pocket  low  ; 

So  how  for  to  Bilk  'em, 
I  did  not  well  know. 

But  at  last  by  a  Stratagem, 

Pretending  to  rally ; 
While  she  went  for  more  Wine, 

I  whip'd  into  an  Ally. 

And  was  so  dexterous  nimble, 

They  could  not  pursue ; 
So  got  rid  of  my  Mistress, 

And  D Reckoning  too. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  323 

Recovering  the  Fields, 

I  was  void  of  all  Fear ; 
And  the  next  place  to  Bedlam, 

My  Course  I  did  steer. 

Where  was  such  amphibious  Crowds, 

I  ne'er  saw  before  ; 
Harlots  for  the  Water, 

As  well  as  the  Shore. 

But  one  above  the  rest, 

So  wondrous  Trim ; 
You  would  sware  she  was  a  Hick, 

And  no  common  Brim. 

Accosted  me  presently, 

And  call'd  me  her  Love  ; 
But  I  soon  did  dismiss  her, 

With  a  Kick  and  a  Shove. 

For  the  Jade  was  so  homely, 

The  D would  not  touch  her ; 

Fit  only  for  a  Dray-man, 
Or  White-Chappd  Butcher. 

But  had  not  walk'd  long, 

Before  a  rare  one  I  espy'd ; 
Bright  as  a  Goddess, 

And  adorn'd  like  a  Bride. 

With  a  rich  Furbelow  Scarf, 

Worth  at  least  Forty  Shilling  ; 
And  when  I  ask'd  her  a  Question, 

Was  extraordinary  willing. 

So  to  the  Tavern  we  went, 

A  Curse  on  the  Place  ; 
For  her  Love  was  so  hot, 

It  soon  fir'd  my  A 

Y  2  Where 

324  SONGS  Compleat, 

Where  after  a  Flask, 

Which  I  swore  she  should  pay  ; 
We  took  both  our  leaves, 

And  went  strait  away. 

The  Plague  of  my  Sins, 
Made  me  damnable  sore  ; 

That  my  Wife  soon  concluded, 
I'd  been  with  a  W . 

She  scolded  so  loud, 

And  continu'd  her  Clamour ; 

I  could  not  forbear, 

But  to  C her  and  D her. 

We  made  such  a  Noise, 
And  con ed  a  Racket ; 

My  Landlady  knew, 

I'd  been  searching  the  Placket. 

And  being  good  natur'd, 
To  make  up  the  Matter ; 

Came  down  in  her  Smock, 
With  Jenny  her  Daughter. 

Ah  !  Tennant  (quoth  She,) 
Let  this  fault  be  remitted ; 

If  he'll  beg  but  your  Pardon, 
He  shall  be  acquitted. 

For  to  speak  by  the  by, 

And  I'm  sure  'tis  fact ; 
You  and  I  have  been  guilty, 

Of  many  such  Act. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 
An  IRISH   Wooing. 


~T~\£rm0t  lov'd  Sheela  well  and  strove  her  Heart  to 
J^/    gain, 

No  mortal  Tongue  can  tell  Dermofs  great  Pain  ; 
And  still  he  cry'd  Sheela  gra,  Sheela  joy,  Sheela  joy, 

Still  he  cry'd  Sheela  joy,  wilt  thou  be  mine. 

I  have  Six  Sheep  my  Joy,  Ten  Goats  and  Twenty 

All  dees  I'll  give  to  dee  if  doul't  be  mine ; 
And  still  he  cry'd  Sheela  gra,  Sheela  joy,  Sheela  joy, 

Still  he  cry'd  Sheela  joy  wilt  thou  be  mine. 

I  have  Potatoes,  and  good  bonny  Clabber  too, 

Ruscan  and  Cream  joy,  wherewith  you  may  slabber 

Arra  take  me  den,  Sheela  joy,  Sheela  joy,  Sheela  joy, 
Take  me  then,  Sheela  joy,  and  make  me  thine. 

Arra  speak  to  me,  Sheela  joy,  what  makes  thy  Mout 

so  dumb, 

If  you  will  be  wid  me,  squeese  my  great  Thumb ; 
Arra  squeese  it  dear  Sheela  joy,  Shela  joy,  Sheela  joy, 
Squeese  it  hard  Sheela  gra,  till  the  Blood  come. 


326  SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Warning  to  all  CUSTARD  Eaters. 

£z:  -  —  ±l_n: 

LET  Totnam  Court  and  Islington, 
.  And  Padington  also  ; 
Attend  with  Lamentation, 
Unto  a  Tale  of  Woe. 

Altho'  'tis  strange,  'tis  true,  no  doubt, 

Of  it  you  may  be  sure ; 
It  is  in  the  News-books  put, 

There's  nothing  can  be  truer. 

Of  many  several  sorts  of  Deaths, 

I  oft  have  heard  I  wis  ; 
But  ne'er  knew  any  lose  his  Life, 

By  such  a  Cause  as  this. 

At  Newbury  that  fatal  place, 

Where  many  a  Man  was  Muster'd  ; 

And  lost  his  Life,  oh  there  it  was, 
A  Youth  was  slain  with  Custard. 

In  that  same  Myrish  bloody  Fenn, 

As  once  it  did  appear  : 
Ox  Essex  and  his  Custard-Men 

Did  choak  the  Cavalier. 


Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  327 

There  liv'd  this  pretty  dapper  Youth, 

Who  was  of  little  Stature  ; 
Shuffvizs  his  Name  in  very  truth, 

And  tender  was  his  Nature. 

He  with  a  Boy  a  Wager  laid, 
A  Custard  he  would  Eat ; 

Before  the  Boy  should  run  so  far, 
And  back  again  retreat 

The  People  all  assembled  were, 
To  see  this  piece  of  Wit  ; 

They  were  agreed,  and  started  fair, 
This  ran,  the  other  bit 

The  nimble  Lad  did  run  and  laugh, 
So  thro'  the  way  he  scowr'd  ; 

That  he  was  coming  back,  e'er  half 
The  Custard  was  devoured, 

The  eating  Champion  seeing  that, 
Much  like  Jack-puddings  Bastard ; 

Clapt  to'ther  half  into  his  Throat 
And  choak'd  himself  with  Custard. 

This  suffocating  Custard  wrought, 

Within  his  gullet  so  ; 
That  on  the  Ground  he  tumbled  down, 

Ah  woful  overthrow  ? 

Two-pence  in  Custard  did  him  choak, 

And  brought  his  Courage  down  ; 
When  death  struck  him  'twas  thought  he  took, 

The  Cream  of  all  the  Town. 


328  SONGS  Compleat, 

One  spark  of  Fire  consumes  a  House, 
Small  Prison  makes  one  pant  \ 

The  Sword-fish  mortifies  the  Whale, 
The  Mouse  the  Elephant. 

But  never  did  I  see  that  Throat, 
Under  my  Lord-Mayor's  roof : 

Unless  they  brought  it  scalding  hot, 
That  was  not  Custard  proof 

Let  this  a  warning  be  to  those, 

That  go  to  Islington  ; 
Custard  will  kill,  Experience  shows, 

As  soon  as  any  Gun. 

Beware  how  you  on  Holidays, 
Abroad  do  Feast  your  Wives  ; 

For  they  that  feed  on  Custard,  go 
In  danger  of  their  Lives. 


To  the  Tune  of.  Turn  again 
Whittington,  &c. 

Under  this  Stone  lies  one,  who  writ  his  Finis  ; 

and  with  a  Trick  of 's  own,  was  kill'd  with  Kindness : 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  329 

He  dy'd  in  such  a  trim,  no  Death  can  match  it, 

A  Custard  was    to  him,  Pap   with    a  Hatchet; 

He  might  as  well  have  been  brain'd  with  a  Silk  Fan, 

As    to    lose    his  Life  in     a      lit — tie  Milk-pan ; 

Tho'  the  great  Guns  and  Pikes  have  loudly  bluster'd, 

There  is  no  Weapon  like  long  Spoon  and  Custard. 



SONGS  Compleat, 

WOO  BO  URN  Fair. 
A  DIALOGUE  between  DICK  and  DOLL. 

,     ^-^-r  o  ^  -*-      -^-^ 

^^|"  ~"  I  •  *  --LJT---  i  I  ' 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  331 


Tenth  Line  of  each  Verse  is  to  be  left  out  at  the 
Second  time  of  Singing  over. 

DOLLY,  come  be  Brisk  and  Jolly, 
Since  Harvest's  home, 
And  Ralph  and  Molly, 
With  Piper  and  Drum  ; 
Are  frisking  now  at  the  Fair : 
Nimble  Katy,  whose  Foot's  so  pretty, 


332  SONGS  Compleat, 

No,  nor  Susan,  with  new  Russet  Shoes  on, 
No,  nor  Ellen,  with  great  Belly  swelling, 

Can  for  Dancing  with  Dolly,  compare, 

Zooks  then  prithee  my  sweetest  Dear. 

She.  Fye  Dick,  you  make  me  so  proud  when  you  tell 


That  none  of  our  Lasses  excel  rre  : 
Nay,  Faith  I  can  guess  your  Design  too, 
With  the  Loss  of  your  own  you'd  have  mine  too, 
But  I  hope  I  shall  mend  the  Case  : 

For  toying  and  coying, 

Come  short  of  enjoying, 

And  tho'  I  let  Loobies, 

Oft  finger  my  Bubbies  : 

Who  think  when  they  Kiss  me, 

That  they  shall  possess  me, 

With  slight  Invitation, 

Fall  to  my  Collation, 
Not  a  bit  till  the  Priest  has  said  Grace. 

He.  Could  you  guess  when  first  I  Woo'd  you, 

I  thought  of  less, 

I  close  pursu'd  you  ; 

Abandon'd  Bess, 
To  gain  dear  Dolly's  good  Will, 
My  Endeavours  to  please  you  ever, 
And  to  Marry  sweet  Doll  of  the  Dairy, 
So  by  Kissing  first  nought  will  be  missing, 
Grant  a  Tast  till  my  Belly  I  fill, 
That,  Ods  Bud  wou'd  do  rarely  well. 

She.  No,  no,  your  cunning  shall  never  deceive  me, 
Should  I  let  you,  you'd  presently  leave  me  ; 
Tho'  something  you  now  may  be  wanting, 
The  Appetite  cloys  with  consenting, 
And  the  Passion  does  soon  decay ; 

Tho'  our  Ears  you  wou'd  tickle, 

We're  false  as  you're  fickle, 

And  mind  not  your  swearing 

False  Oaths,  and  declaring, 


Pleasant  and  Divertive.  333 

Your  amorous  Nonsense, 
Nor  Love  dated  long  since  : 
For  by  late  Forbearance, 
I  know  by  Experience, 
There's  few  till  they're  Bound  will  Obey. 

The  SEA-FIGHT  in  92. 
Set  by  Mr.  AKEROYDE. 


-rr  F  r~r^~t ~°  H~ 
£.^5^;   EEE 


334  SONGS  Compleat, 

THursday  in  the  Morn  the  Ides  of  May, 
Recorded  for  ever  the  famous  Ninety  Two  ; 
Brave  Russel  did  discern  by  dawn  of  Day, 

The  lofty  Sails  of  France,  advancing  now  : 
All  Hands  aloft,  aloft,  let  English  Valour  shine, 
Let  fly  a  Culverin,  the  Signal  for  the  Line  ; 
Let  every  Hand  supply  his  Gun, 

Follow  me,  and  you'll  see, 
That  the  Battle  will  be  soon  begun. 

Tourville  on  the  Main  Triumphant  rowl'd, 

To  meet  the  Gallant  Russel    in  combate  on  the 

He  led  the  noble  train  of  Heroes  bold, 

To  sink  the  English  Admiral  at  his  Feet : 
Now  every  valiant  mind  to  Victory  doth  aspire, 
The  bloody  Fight's  begun,  the  Sea  it  self  on  Fire ; 

And  mighty  Fate  stood  looking  on, 
Whilst  a  Flood  all  of  Blood, 

Fill'd  the  Scup'r-holes  of  the  Royal  Sun. 

Sulphur,  Smoak  and  Fire,  disturb'd  the  Air, 

With  Thunder  and  Wonder  affright  the  Gallick  shoar; 
Their  regulated  bands  stood  trembling  near, 

To  see  the  lofty  Streamers  now  no  more  : 
At  Six  a  Clock  the  Red,  the  smiling  Victors  led, 
To  give  a  second  blow,  the  fatal  overthrow  ; 

Now  Death  and  Horror  equal  reign, 
Now  they  cry,  run  or  dye, 

Brittish  Colours  rid  the  vanquished  Main. 

See  they  fly  amaz'd  through  Rocks  and  Sands, 

One  danger  they  grasp  at  to  shun  the  greater  Fate ; 
In  vain  they  cry  for  aid  to  weeping  Lands, 

The  Nymphs  and  Sea-Gods  mourn  their  lost  estate  : 
For  evermore  adieu  thou  Royal  dazling  Sun, 
From  thy  untimely  end  thy  Masters  Fate  begun  ; 

Enough  thou  mighty  God  of  War, 
Now  we  Sing  bless  the  King, 

Let  us  drink  to  every  English  Tarr. 


Pleasant  and  Diver  live.  335 

The  Honest  Mans  Fortune :   Set  by  Mr. 
Thomas  Wroth. 



336  SONGS  Compleat, 

THE  mighty  state  of  Cuckoldom,  by  Matrimony 

It  is  a  never  failing  Portion,  paid  us  by  our  Wives ; 
It  was  of  Old, 
As  we  are  told, 
The  Charter  of  each  Nation  ; 
In  Palestine  it  did  subdue, 
The  Circumcis'd  hard  hearted  Jew, 
And  'tis  a  Christian  Dispensation. 

Each  jarring  Kingdom  of  the  World,  in  this  one  point 


Thus   Cuckoldom,  may  well  be  call'd  th'  united  Pro 
vinces  ; 

It  does  invest, 
With  ample  Crest, 
Min — heer — van — pluchen — Hans  ; 
CUCKOLDS  are  made  Grandees  of  Spain, 
And  ev'n  in  Italy  they  reign, 

And  they  are  Alamode  of  France. 

The   Persian,  Jew,  Mahometan,  the  Protestant,  and 


Owe  what  they  are  to  the  Intrigues  and  Kindness  of  a 
Woman  ; 

What  she's  bestow'd, 
They  count  no  load, 
Nor  think  their  HORNS  Oppression ; 
For  sure  no  Sot  can  be  so  blind, 
As  to  esteem  a  Wife  unkind, 

That  largely  adds  to  his  Possession. 

Yet  some  will  call  poor  Cuckolds  Beasts,  and  range 

them  in  three  Classes, 

The   Goat- Cuckolds,   the   HLzm- Cuckolds,  and   we   all 
know  they're  Asses ; 
The  Goats  ne'er  mind, 
Their  Horns  behind, 
Large  Crest  the  Ram  adorns  ; 
Which  on  his  Brow  in  Terror  lies, 
Hanging  in  Judgment  o'er  his  E)es, 
And  Asses  take  their  Ears  for  HORNS. 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 



— ^ — i — p— j-fr 

POOR  C7<a?«*V<f  thy  Garlands  tear, 
From  off  thy  Widow'd  Brow  ; 
And  bind  thy  loose  dishevel'd  Hair, 

With  Ewe  and  Cypress  now  : 
And  Since  the  Gods  decreed  his  Years, 

Shou'd  have  so  short  a  Date  ; 
Let  thy  sad  Eyes,  pay  Seas  of  Tears, 
As  Tribute  to  his  Fate. 

The  Trees  a  duller  Green  have  worn, 

Since  that  dear  Swain  is  gone ; 
The  tender  Flocks  their  Pasture  mourn, 

And  bleat  a  sadder  Moan  : 
The  Birds  that  did  frequent  these  Groves, 

To  happy  Mansions  fly  ; 
And  all  that  once  smil'd  on  our  Loves, 

Now  seem  to  bid  me  die. 
VOL.  iv.  z 


SONGS  Compleat, 

A  SONG.  Set  by  Mr.  Leveridge,  Sung  by 
Mr.  Wilks  in  the  Comedy  caltd  the  Re 
cruiting  Officer. 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 


Fair  one  be  kind,  you  never  shall  find, 
A  Fellow  so  fit  for  a  Lover  ; 
Come  Fair  one  be  kind,  you  never  shall  find, 

A  Fellow  so  fit  for  a  Lover  : 
The  World  shall  view  my  Passion  for  you, 
The  World  shall  view  my  Passion  for  you, 

But  never  your  Passion  discover  : 
The  World  shall  view,  my  Passions  for  you, 

z  2  The 

340  SONGS  Compleat, 

The  World  shall  view  my  Passion  for  you, 

But  never  your  Passion  discover. 
I  still  will  Complain  of  Frowns  and  Disdain, 

Tho'  I  revel  thro'  all  your  Charms  ; 
I  still  will  Complain  of  Frowns  and  Disdain, 

Tho'  I  revel  thro'  all  your  Charms  : 
The  World  shall  declare,  I  dye  with  Despair, 
I  die  with  Despair,  I  die  with  Despair, 

When  only  I  die  in  your  Arms, 

When  only  I  die  in  your  Arms  : 
I  still  will  adore,  Love  more  and  more, 

But  by  Jove  if  you  chance  to  prove  Cruel, 
I'll  get  me  a  Miss,  that  freely  will  Kiss, 
I'll  get  me  a  Miss,  that  freely  will  Kiss, 

Tho'  after  I  drink  Water-gruel. 
P II  get  me,  &c. 

The  NORTHAMPTON-SHIRE  Health,  Set  by 

Pleasant  and  Diver tive.  341 

T  T  ERE's  a  Health  to  those  Men, 
J7J.    That  go  with  us  again, 

To  chuse  Knights  that  can  afford,  Sir, 
To  serve  without  Pension, 
Or  other  Pretension, 

But  Just  and  Right  is  the  Word,  Sir. 

As  for  those  that  have  Pay, 
We  have  nothing  to  say, 

Let  the  Soldier  live  by  his  Sword,  Sir, 
We're  for  them  that  are  known, 
To  have  Lands  of  their  own, 

And  Just  and  Right  is  the  Word,  Sir. 

Should  we  chuse  the  Court  Tools, 
They  will  call  us  all  Fools, 

Tho'  a  double  Saint  and  a  Lord,  Sir, 
We  are  sure  we  can  trust, 
To  the  Right  and  the  Just, 

For  Just  and  Right  is  the  Word,  Sir. 

Then  take  off  your  Glass  fair, 
To  do  otherwise  here, 

Is  unjust  against  Right,  and  absurd,  Sir  ; 
He  that  leaves  but  three  drops, 
Shall  have  them  thrown  in's  Chops, 

For  Just  and  Right  is  the  Word,  Sir. 


SONGS  Compleat) 

PARE  Mighty  Love,  O  spare  a  Slave, 

That  at  th7  Feet  for  Mercy  lyes  : 
hat  would  thy  cruel  Godhead  have, 
See  how  he  bleeds,  see  how  he  dyes  : 
Upon  a  noble  Conquest  go, 
And  for  thy  Glory  and  my  Peace ; 

Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

O  make  the  scornful  Ccelia  know, 

The  Pains  she  now  regardless  sees. 
O  make,  &c, 

Dye  all  thy  Arrows  in  my  Tears, 

And  subtly  poyson  so  each  Dart ; 
That  spite  of  all  those  Arms  she  wears, 

The  point  at  last  may  reach  her  Heart : 
Revenge,  revenge  the  Wounds  I  bear, 

And  make  our  Fortunes  so  agree, 
That  I  may  find  that  Cure  from  her, 

Which  she  may  need  as  much  from  me. 
That  I  may,  &c. 


The  Maid  of 


SONGS  Compleat, 


ON  Brandon  Heath,  in  sight  of  Methwold Steeple, 
In  Norfolk  as  I  Rode  along, 
I  met  a  Maiden  with  Apples  laden, 

And  thus,  thus  to  her  I  urg'd  my  Song : 
Kiss  me  said  I,  She  answer'd  no, 
And  still  she  cry'd  I  won't,  I  won't,  I  won't  do  so ; 
But  when  I  did  my  Love  begin, 

Quoth  she  good  Sir  ;  quoth  she  good  Sir,  good  Sir,  I 
live  in  Lyn. 

'Twas  Summer  season  then,  and  sultry  weather, 

Which  put  this  fair  Maid  in  a  Sweat ; 
Said  I  come  hither,  let  us  together, 

Go  try  to  lay  this  scorching  heat : 
But  she  deny'd,  the  more  I  cry'd, 

And  answer'd  no,  and  seem'd  to  go ; 
But  when  I  did  my  Love  begin, 

Quoth  she  good  Sir,  I  live  in  Lyn. 

To  Kiss  this  Maiden,  then  was  my  intent, 
.1  felt  her  Hand,  and  snowy  Breast ; 
With  much  perswasion,  she  shew  occasion, 

That  I  was  free  to  do  the  rest : 
Then  in  we  went  and  Six-pence  spent, 

I  cry'd  my  Dear,  she  cry'd  forbear ; 
But  when  I  did  my  Love  begin, 

Quoth  she  good  Sir,  I  live  in  Lyn. 

Three  times  I  try'd  to  satisne  this  Maiden, 

And  she  perceiv'd  her  Lover's  pain  ; 
Then  I  wou'd  go,  but  she  cry'd  no, 

And  bid  me  try  it  o'er  again : 


Pleasant  and  Divertive. 

She  cry'd  my  Dear,  I  cry'd  forbear, 
Yet  e'er  we  parted  fain  wou'd  know 

Where  I  might  see  this  Maid  again, 
Quoth  she  good  Sir,  I  live  in  Lyn. 


The  Beauty,    a    SONG    made  and  Set  to 
Musick  by  GEORGE  KINGSLEY,  Gent. 


SONGS  Compleat, 

A  Lass  !  my  poor  tender  Heart  must  now  surrender, 
Since  Love  such  a  train  of  Artillery  brings  ; 
Such  Graces  and  Glories  attend  my  sweet  Chloris, 
As  are  able  to  conquer  and  captivate  Kings  : 
Each  lovely  Feature,  of  this  pure  Creature, 
Creates  a  Cruel,  cruel,  cruel,  cruel  ling'ring  smart : 
Her  blushing  Nose  is  as  red  as  Rose  is, 
Its  glowing,  glowing,  glowing,  glowing  heat  inflames  my 


Pleasant  and  Divertive  347 

The  Charms  of  her  Eyes,  what  Tongue  can  tell, 

Of  Which  each  Glance  conveys  a  Spell ; 

And  at  distance  they  look  like  two  Frogs  in  a  Well, 

But  oh  !  the  Balsamick  scent  of  her  Toes, 

And  the  Nectar  that  drops,  drops,  drops  from  her  Nose; 

Hey  ho, 
And  a  comfortable  Gale  from  her  Elbows  :  Hey  ho, 

Hey  ho, 
And  still  I  cry  in  vain,  O  Love,  O  Love,   O  Love, 


Love,  O  Love,  O  Love,  O  Love,  Love,  Love,  O  Love, 
Come  ease  my  Pain. 

But  her  Heart  alass  is  as  hard  as  a  Flint, 

Let  me  dye  if  I  thinknot  the  Devil  is  in't ; 

For  always  upon  me  she  loooketh  a  squint :  Hey  ho, 

Yet  Nature  at  least  has  served  her  right, 

In  taking  all  her  Teeth  out  quite  : 

That  tho'  she  can  Bark,  she  cannot  Bite,  Hey  ho, 

And  indeed  for  this  there  was  a  just  Cause, 

For  according  to  blind  Cupid's  Laws, 

Love  should  have  neither  Fangs  nor  Claws,  Hey  ho. 

A  Scotch  SONG,  the  Words  by  Mr.  John 
Hallam,  Set  to  Musick  by  Mr.  John 

*5~          -  -  ^   1  jgfcgH- 


SONGS  Compleat, 

te:^fIpq^>  I  fqi^ijafsS^ 

UPON  the  Wings  of  Love  my  Dear  I  come, 
No  more  I  will  depart  from  thee  and  Home  ; 
The  dreadful  noise  of  Battles  now  do  cease, 
Brave  Willy  is  return'd  with  Joy  and  Peace  : 
The  Trumpet  shrill  no  more  shall  sound  Alarms, 
And  call  thy  Jockey  out  of  thy  soft  Arms ; 
In  which  I'll  lig  and  sleep  both  Day  and  Night, 
And  Dream  of  nought  but  Pleasures  and  Delight. 

Each  bonny  Lad  shall  with  his  loving  Lass, 
With  Pipe  and  Tabor  trip  it  on  the  Grass  ; 
With  Chaplets  gay  my  Jenny  shall  be  crown'd, 
And  with  her  Loving  Jockey  'Dance  around  : 
In  Silks  and  Sattins  then  my  only  dear, 
The  Blithest  Lass  in  Tweedale  shall  appear ; 
Thou  shalt  enjoy  what  e'er  thou  dost  desire, 
And  in  each  other's  Arms  we  will  expire. 

Pleasant  and  Diver  live. 


A  SONG,  Set  and  Sung  by  Mr.  LEVERIDGE, 
at  the  Theatre  Royal. 


FOOLISH  Swain  thy  sighs  forbear, 
Nothing  can  her  Passion  move ; 
Calia  with  a  careless  Air, 
Laughs  to  hear  the  Tales  of  Love  : 


350  SONGS   Compleat, 

Darts  and  Flames  the  Nymph  defies, 
Toys  which  other  Hearts  beguile  : 

Pleasure  sparkles  in  her  Eyes, 
Gay  without  an  am'rous  Smile. 

Calia  like  the  feather'd  Choir, 

Ever  on  the  Wing  for  flight ; 
Hops  from  this  to  that  desire, 

Flutt'ring  still  in  new  delight : 
Pleas'd  she  seems  when  you  are  by, 

And  when  absent  she's  the  same ; 
Talks  of  Love  like  you  or  I, 

But  believ'st  an  empty  Name. 

Always  easy,  never  kind, 

When  you  think  you  have  her  sure  : 
Such  a  Tempter  you  will  find, 

Quick   to   wound,   quick  to  wound,  quick  to 
wound,  but  slow  to  Cure, 

Pleasant  and  Divertive.  351 

A  SONG,  Set  by  Mr.  Berenclow. 




SONGS  Compleat. 




TAKE  not  the  first  Refusal  ill, 
Tho'  now  she  won't,  anon  she  will, 
Tho'  now  she  won't,  anon  she  will, 
Take  not  the  first  Refusal  ill  : 
She  were  not  a  Woman  if  she  knew, 
One  Moment  what  the  next  she'd  do  ; 
She  were  not  a  Woman  if  she  knew, 
One  Moment,  one  Moment  what  the  next  she'd  do : 
If  you'll  have  patience  she'll  be  kind,  kind,  she'll  be 


To  Day  ne'er  knew  to  morrow's  Mind  ; 
Wait  till  you  find  her  in  the  cue, 
If  you  don't  ask  her,  ask  her,  she,  she'll  ask  you. 



D'Urfey,   Thomas 
Songs  compleat